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Dim Sims ISBI 7/9

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  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    Aww... Poor Divan :( But he is too cute to be alone, are you blind all, ladies? :/

    I know! It took FOREVER! But...he does eventually succeed. It's not pretty, but it happens--in the next update! :smiley:
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  • EgewinhEgewinh Posts: 72 Member
    But but but I love Vicki, she's awesome and so unique. They would make awesome babies be a home wrecker, Divan lol. Great update
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    ISBI - Posh Life. Meet Cash Snobbington
  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    @Egewinh Vicki reminds me of that woman in The Parent Trap with Lindsey Lohan. She looks exactly like the woman who was dating the father. And acts like her too! Ha!
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  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    edited November 2015
    Chapter 1.3


    The next day, Divan goes to another bar, determined to find a wife. Or at least someone who wouldn’t slap his face, throw drinks at him, or treat him like he smelled like a wet dog who’d just got into a fight with a skunk.

    (I snap my fingers at him. There’s the PERFECT girl! Out back. Quick! She might get away.)

    Divan rushes outside, only to find Kaila staring at the pool, looking like she was deciding whether to go in her clothes or not.

    He wrinkles his nose. “Really? Kaila? She won’t even speak to me.”

    (I think she’ll change her mind. Just be a little more subtle. Gentle is the key here.)

    He shrugs then goes over to Kaila and says, “So...where were we? Oh yes, your place or mine?” He wiggles his eyebrows and leans in for a kiss.

    Instantly, she shoots her hand out, disgusted.

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    ***facepalm***

    (Okay, this calls for drastic measures because Divan is obviously a few fries short of a Happy Meal. Oy. So, I plant some love lamps around, setting the mood. I don’t care if it’s against some sort of rule. He needs help!)

    And what do you know? Kaila lets him smack a sloppy kiss on her even though her eyes pop almost outside of her head in shock.

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    But he’s not finished. He moves in, drawing her close to him and it’s like all the memories of treachery and pain vanish with the flutter of his beautiful eyelashes. She is his.

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    They kiss for so long, Divan starts thinking about improving his manly looks.

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    (Okay, okay...you’ve got her, Divan. Now don’t waste anymore time. Her meter is at high octane PINK. Ask her to marry you!)

    He doesn’t even protest (which is a first, I might add). Pulling her into the bar (I guess so he can have a few witnesses so she can’t back out when the love lamps’ effects are gone,) he drops on one knee.

    “Sweet cheeks, would you be my cuddle muffin, forever and ever and let me be the daddy of your sweet daughter so I can get on with this...er...whatever it is?” He glances at me, rolling his eyes for a second, and then slaps on a sweet smile for Kaila.

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    She puts on the diamond ring and says, “Of course, Snuggie woogems, I will. By the way, YOU are the true deadbeat father of my daughter. And if you EVER stray again, I will cut off your tinkle bits and feed them to you for supper.” She flashes a fierce grin and bats her eyelashes.

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    “Yipes!” he whines in his head at me all the while smiling like this is the best day of his life.

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    (Weeell, this is getting off to a wondrous start, I must say!)


    Divan decides not to waste another minute (especially because if he remains single for much longer, he knows he’s more prone to wander off the faithful path), so they plan their wedding.

    Kaila looks lovely in a black dress (I hope that’s not an omen to come) and Divan is dashing as always in a tux.

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    And then the moment we’ve all been waiting for happens! The nuptials.

    “Kaila, thank you for putting up with my antics and giving this another shot. I promise to guide you to food, help you with laundry, and feed the babies in the middle of the night even without you asking.”

    (He doesn’t even realize how true that will be!)

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    “And I promise, “ Kaila coos, “to...well, to survive as your wife and the mother of your many children.” She gives him the ring and Divan’s heart swells because he truly loves her and knows she’s been the only one he’s ever truly wanted ever since high school.

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    He gives her a sweet peck on the cheek and promises her more later.

    (Aww...)

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    Instead of a honeymoon, the two instant parents (well, instant for Divan, who had no idea he was a father already) went home and ate supper that Divan fixed. His daughter, Brianna, looked very much like him.

    “I like this mystery meat, Daddy,” Brianna says, stuffing her mouth.

    “So glad you’re eating without me having to call you to supper!” Divan says, still not understanding how truly wonderful this is!

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    Brianna picks up the dirty dishes and puts them into the dishwasher.

    (I love this child!)

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    So without any dishes to clean, the two honeymooners quickly retire for the night.

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    And whip up enough sparks and feathers and dust to almost set the bedroom on fire.

    (Whoa, Divan! Way to make your wife happy!)

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    As the two were making babies, Brianna aged up surprisingly!

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    She inherited her father’s active trait, so that means she’ll clean the house and stay in shape. I decided to make her a gym in the basement to help encourage fitness. Maybe someone will use it!

    I couldn’t believe how much she looked like her mom.

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    So, I redecorated her room (and yes, with the money Kaila brought in, I moved them to a bigger house.)

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    Kaila uses the bathroom and discovers some wonderful news!

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    Celebrating the only way Divan knows how, he whispers in her ear, "Does my Yummy Gummy want her Chef of Love?"

    (Okay...TMI, people...)

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    The next day, it was back to the grindstone for Divan, but he likes his work and didn’t mind.

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    Unfortunately, his late night baby making made him fail miserably. So glad I’m not counting points. We haven’t even been a fam for one whole day and the TH is failing!

    ***slams head on desk***

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    Post edited by pammiechick on
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  • roseinblack69roseinblack69 Posts: 4,066 Member
    edited November 2015
    Wow, how many events and all they are very happy and positive :) Firstly it seemed me Brianna is similar to Divan, but now I think she is more like her mom :) I like this funny family, looking forward to read more <3
  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    @roseinblack69 I know...I actually see both parents in her. That shot just really showed all Kaila. This is a happy family and things go fairly smoothly at first. :) I would have more screen shots but at the time, my mouse wasn't working well so it was hard to take them. Very frustrating!
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  • sabreenesabreene Posts: 1,152 Member
    Those pictures of Divan and the ring turned out sooo nice! Looking from those to Kaila to Brianna, I can totally see her parents in her!

    The ISBI playstyles are so much fun, it's like a light-hearted romp. Even when things go bad, like passing out on the floor, it's just funny.
  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    edited November 2015
    @sabreene That's why I eat ISBI's like candy. Lots of fun even when things go wrong (which they do. All. The. Time. :lol: )
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  • MarialeinMarialein Posts: 2,885 Member
  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    Thank you @Marialein and welcome to an ISBI. Glad to have you reading this silly story! <3
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  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    edited November 2015
    Chapter 1.4

    As we peek into the goings on in this burgeoning family, we see that Brianna gets right to work, cooking macaroni and cheese since her parents are no where to be found.

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    And right afterwards, she uses the treadmill I put in the basement.

    (I think I like this teen already!)

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    When Divan arrives home, he whispers sweetly to his wife, making her giggle.

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    But as she gets a bite to eat, an intense pain seizes her.

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    (Uh oh, Divan! It’s baby time!)

    Shockingly, Divan doesn’t even react. It must be the scientist in him. He just winks at all the nurses as he watches his wife get poked and prodded by a strange robot machine.

    (Or is he flirting with that nurse? Stop it, Divan! You just had a baby. Pay attention to your wife and child!)

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    After what felt like days (three sim days to be exact), their baby boy, Hunter, ages up.

    (Doesn’t he look exactly like his dad?)

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    And since there is only two bedrooms in the tiny house, they decide to move. Thank goodness Divan listened to me and planted that cash crop of plants.

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    They all arrive at the new digs. Brianna is especially happy. “Think of all the boys I can invite over!” she whispers.

    (Divan! You need to keep your daughter under guard!)

    But he ignores me. He’s wearing his undies out in public. Nuff said!

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    Divan happily cooks in his gourmet kitchen even though his family doesn’t take notice. Hunter grabs a bowl of cereal anyway.

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    This living room is large enough for the whole family to enjoy a meal and watch tv.

    (I personally don’t think this is a healthy way to live, but yeah. No one cares for my opinion in this household.)

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    After dinner, Divan decides it’s time for some loving and Kaila is very receptive.

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    (Divan, you do know what happens when you woo hoo, right?)

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    Kaila feels a little sick. Is that from pregnancy? Nope. It’s a disgusting toilet.

    (Thank you for cleaning! These neat sims are the best!)

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    Hunter is a little cutie pie who plays on the computer....

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    And washes the dishes.

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    And yay! Divan comes home with a promotion. And none too soon. They need the extra cash for this palace they decided to move into.

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    After cleaning the toilet, Kaila finds out that yes! She is going to have another baby.

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    (Did you hear that, Divan? And your cash crop is failing. Better get out there and work!)

    “Nag, nag, nag, Creator. Can’t you see that’s what I’m doing? I know you don’t care that I worked an entire shift at the plant and am plum tired. Noooo.”

    (Stop whining and work. You can sleep later.)

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    With all the excitement of the new baby, Hunter has totally forgotten he has his own bed.

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    And...

    PLOP.

    Total failure. UGH!

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    But Kaila doesn’t seem to mind that her little boy is drooling on her floor. She decides she needs to keep her shape even though she’s blowing up like a balloon.

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    Brianna joins her.

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    So glad this family has their priorities straight.

    1. Work out.
    2. Get smelly
    3. Never take a shower
    4. Get tired
    5. Have green smoke and mud blotting their bodies as they drool on the floor.

    Oh the fun!

    “Gosh, mom,” Brianna says, “I’m so tired. Have you heard of this invention? It’s called a bed!”

    “I think that’s only for woo hoo, dear.”

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    Later, when Divan gets frisky, Kaila feels an overpowering sensation to puke.

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    (Not a good sign of your romance skillz, Div, if you ask me.)

    Divan looks up at me, “Who asked you?”

    (Touchy!)

    Before Divan has to leave work, he fixes the computer, leaving a mess on the floor because he doesn’t have time to pick it up or he’ll be late.

    When Hunter enters the room, no one decides to clean the mess. In fact, Hunter splashes in it, laughing with glee while his sister is blissfully unaware as she plays her game.

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    When Kaila gets home from work, she asks, “Who made all this mess?”

    That’s when the teenager comes to life and points at Hunter.

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    Furious, Kaila asks, “What do you have to say for yourself, young man?”

    “Gosh, Mommy, I was just looking for parts to help Daddy with the next repairs.” He gives her that “Divan Rex” cheesy smile.

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    Kaila bends down to hug him. “Aww...that’s momma’s little helper!”

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    (No...that’s momma’s little plum! Don’t listen to him! He’s just like his father!)

    But unlike Divan, Kaila can’t hear me and she’s been suckered yet again. Poor woman.

    Feeling a bit guilty for his fib, Hunter decides to clean the whole house.

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    When Divan comes home from work, he’s excited about the new baby, so he makes a Divan special.

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    Unfortunately, he wasn’t watching and Brianna took a few swigs too many of this libation and well...

    Fail.

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    Sigh...
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  • roseinblack69roseinblack69 Posts: 4,066 Member
    LOL :D Thanks for making me laugh, @pammiechick :D They all are totally crazy :D
  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    It is a crazy ISBI fam. Love playing them! Thanks for reading! <3
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  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    @Julyvee94 I was looking through the future pics and it gets crazier! Lol! My poor sims. :lol:
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  • VIRTUALEEVIRTUALEE Posts: 2,507 Member
    @pammiechick I LOVE this it made me sincerely rofl! Kailas puke face needs to be frames its priceless!!! I have favorited so I wont miss a chapter. Good job :smile:
  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    edited November 2015
    @VIRTUALEE Thank you so much! I love this silly story--it's been fun to do! Hope to update soon!
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  • nessanewbynessanewby Posts: 241 Member
    I had never heard of an ISBI until this, and (embarrassingly) even had to look up what it stood for! But I've got to say, it has had me ROFL! SO very funny! I love it so far, and can't wait to read more! Thanks for sharing Pammie! <3
  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    edited November 2015
    Chapter 1.5

    Divan decides he’s neglected his wife long enough and asks her on a date.

    (Ahem...DIVAN! This is a PG-13 thread. What ARE you doing???)

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    He leers up at me and says, “Serves you right for peeking, Creator.”

    ***Wipes face in frustration as steam hisses out of my ears***

    Divan then tantalizes his date about the finer points of fast food. “And don’t get me started about dipping fries in chocolate shakes. YUM!”

    Kaila seems thoroughly interested. These two are definitely made for each other.

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    When they arrive home, Kaila goes into labor.

    Is Divan worried?

    Just look at his cheesy grin in the mirror. Nothing fazes him.

    "I'm just liking the view. Pregnant women are sexxxxy!"

    (Um...I did NOT need to hear that, Divan.)

    "Then get out of my head, Creator."

    ***glares***

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    And not one but two babies are born!

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    Meet little Levi and Lindsey Rex.

    Divan immediately goes to help.

    (No, Divan, you cannot transform these babies into milkshakes. Now get back to your fatherly duties!)

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    After the babies are born, the house is a filthy mess, so Brianna cleans. “When can I ever have fun? It’s all work, work, work!” she whines.

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    So she drops the plate at her feet and goes into the kids bedroom to play blicblock 24-7 like she always does.

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    Kaila is so happy to have those two monsters from pummeling her belly, she decides to make a drink.

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    I mean, drinks. And then she leaves them there and trots off to troll teh forums.

    (I don't get sim behavior at all.)

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    Yay! It’s time for the babies to sparkle into kids.

    First Lindsey.

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    And then Levi.

    (Divan, why are you always running around in your underwear?)

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    “Cuz my snuggiemuffins likes me like this.”

    (Okay, TMI...)

    “You asked, Creator.”

    (Sigh)

    That night, the happy little family ate all together in the dining area. A first!

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    But before Divan could wash any dishes...

    Fail.

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    (Divan! You’re failing more than your family who I can’t control! What is up?)

    Lazily looking at me, he says, “It’s because you make me a slave to that dangblasted crop out there. I can’t keep this up, Creator!”

    (Stop whining already. It’s because of me that you live waaaaay better than most sims at your level. No first gen legacy ever lives in houses like these. Now get outside and weed!)

    Oops. I think I pushed him too hard.

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    Sigh...
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  • roseinblack69roseinblack69 Posts: 4,066 Member
    LOL :D Divan is amazing :D
  • pammiechickpammiechick Posts: 11,553 Member
    edited November 2015
    Chapter 1.6

    “OMG, my family is made up of a bunch of losers,” Brianna mumbles to herself as she looks at her dad, nose planted in the shrubbery.

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    (That’s not a very nice thing to say.)

    But she can’t hear me. Just as well. Her YA birthday is tonight and danged if I’m going to make her the heir. She’s a bit on the mean side.

    They all have a very nice time at a museum for Brianna’s birthday, but unfortunately, I forgot to get any shots of it but this one.

    Divan stares, saying in a monotone voice, “Mmm....cake...yummy...”

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    (Doesn’t take much to make him happy.)

    “You do realize I hear everything you say, Creator.”

    (Um, yeah. Actually, I do.)

    “You’re officially on ignore,” he declares, pointing up at me.

    (Go ahead. Try. I dare you.)

    He shakes his head and spins home.

    Only it isn’t the home he’s left.

    (Surprise! All your hard work has paid off, Divan! Welcome to your new uptown digs!)

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    Looking around, Divan smiles. “You’ve outdone yourself, Creator!”

    (So...you’re talking to me now? I thought so. Oh, Divan! Your kids! They’re about to have a pee failure! Get them in the house!)

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    Avoiding his pee failure, Hunter takes a bath only to...

    FAIL!

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    “My, this is a gorgeous home!” Kaila says, inspecting the modern kitchen. “But I wonder where my husband is?”

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    (He’s out in the backyard, tending the garden. After all, money doesn’t grow on trees...well, in this case, maybe it does!)

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    (So, you’re happily gardening now, Divan?)

    “You know what they say...happy wife, happy life!”

    (Good. Glad you’re finally making sense and seeing things my way!)

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    But before I could finish my sentence, Divan disappears and all I could get of him was a few green sparkles!

    (Wha???)

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    I look up to see the culprit.

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    Many moments later...

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    (Um...are you all right, Divan?)

    Glaring, he asks, “So WHERE do these plants come from anyway?”

    (Weeell...heh...um....)

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    “Don’t talk to me ever again. That was just...embarrassing...”

    (But, Divan, Kaila is waiting for you in the house and I think she wants to thank you for making all her dreams come true.)

    “Really?”

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    (YES! Move!)

    Divan’s simple brain goes into full tilt male hormone. We won’t see him for a while.

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    Well, he finds Kaila right away and speaks sweet love sonnets to her.

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    “How about you and me and the bed makes three?”

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    “Oh, Divan, you say the sweetest things,” Kaila coos.

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    (Doesn’t take much, does it?)

    “She’s been falling for this smolder since high school,” Divan says to me in his head as he laser beams his eyes on her.

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    (Ugh...how long till one of your kids ages up? I think the cheese is getting a little too much. Even for me.)

    “You only have yourself to blame. You created me.”

    (Please don’t remind me, Divan...)

    “Come on, you hunk of man you!” Kaila waves a finger toward her as she struts up the stairs to the boudoir.

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    But poor Divan, after all the UFO dealings can’t seem to make it to the room.

    It’s just...yup.

    FAIL!

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    Lindsey knocks him on the head. “Daddy? Daddy???”
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  • roseinblack69roseinblack69 Posts: 4,066 Member
    :D OMG! I love Divan and his family! <3:D Now I'm thinking what will happen if Divan will be pregnant :o
  • SeaDragonSongSeaDragonSong Posts: 2,310 Member
    edited November 2015
    I'm sitting here and I'm dying of laughter, their priorities are EXACTLY how they should be xD

    Divan, two hints: 1. TMI. 2: TMI
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