What ah my jeez the second he showed up I knew he was Cosmic Mint that is your future husband how can you not realize ;_;.
BUT AHH FIR IS ADORABLE.
I kinda wanted to smack Cosmic when he was like "alright stop hugging" because like excuse me that was a moment and you just ruined it.
Ah my jeez when Reno realizes I bet he will be flipping tables and chairs and anything else he can find.
Ahh I'm excited for your next update now.
Amazing chapter .
Well, she was a bit scared and confused at first. But she got it.
You'll see why he acts the way he does next chapter when he takes her to go talk to the King.
Yup. It's not gonna be good.
Me toooooo! Hopefully I can make it in the next couple of days, but I'm not really sure. I have to do college apps right now, because they just opened and I want to get them out of the way.
Thank you!
Limping down the hall was difficult, to say the least. In those heels, I couldn’t put any weight on that foot--and here I was thinking that it was getting better--so I grabbed onto Cosmic’s arm to hold myself up. If he were alive, I would have been able to feel the warmth of his arm comforting me as we walked to see his leader. I would have felt the taut muscles shifting beneath his skin as he moved his arm. Instead, he just felt like a rock. Even as I felt his movements, it was just like he were a moving boulder. It was not comforting in the least.
“How much farther?” I whined, “Can I take these off, at least until I get there?” I hoped that Cosmic would stop to talk to me, but he kept going. He just kept speed walking down the hall.
“No. We are almost there.” His voice was so formal, it wasn’t at all like when he’d first come to me in that dark room. “Just another turn here.” He explained, steering me down another dark hallway. Even in the dark I could see a large door waiting for us at the other end. Looming. As we approached it, it seemed to grow disproportionately from everything around it, until it towered over us. Cosmic reached for it, pulling his arm away from my grip, and set his hand on the handle. “Are you ready?” He asked. He actually did wait for me to nod before swinging the huge doors away from us, exposing us to the King’s throne room.
It was dark in the throne room, the only light emanating from a few candles scattered about the room. It flickered and jumped, creating a spooky aura that filled the air--which was accompanied by the general dead feeling that came from the vampberries--making me feel like I was stuck inside a very bad Spooky Day special. Only, this wasn’t a TV special, it was reality. I took a deep breath, and a loud swallow, and stepped forward into the room. My heels were ridiculously loud against the floor, especially in the absence of all the regular noises. The whirr of heating and cooling units was gone; vampberries didn’t need to worry about the temperature. There was not a single sound of breathing in the room, other than mine, which created more than it’s fair share of noise. Vampberries were exceptionally quiet creatures, that much was clear.
In the silence even my ears were able to pick up on the sound of Cosmic’s shoes as he walked away from the door, and the thump of the door as it shut. I expected him to place a comforting hand on my shoulder or back as he approached me, to give me a sign that it was all going to be okay. I braced myself for the cold that his hand would bring; but it never came. I knew that he was standing there, right behind me, but he was not making a single motion to touch me. It must have been forbidden; vampberry to human contact, that would have been the only thing that kept him so far away from me when there were others around. Steeling myself in position, I hoped that I could keep my balance for long enough, and that my ankle wouldn’t give out while I was standing there in front of the King.
The King stood from his desk, placing his hands flat against the top. A sickening smile spread across his face, exposing his fangs for my viewing pleasure, letting me know not to cross him because it wouldn’t end well for me. Not that I needed a reminder.
When he felt he’d gotten the message across to me, he stepped away from the desk, and closer to me. His fangs stayed exposed as he looked me up and down, his eyes tracing every part of me--and lingering where I didn’t want them to linger. He stuck out his hand, index finger extended, and started swirling his finger. When I didn’t catch on he barked at me to spin around. I inched my way around, taking careful steps, and I was able to mask my expressions of pain pretty well. He commanded me to stop once I’d turned 180 degrees, so I did, knowing exactly what he was doing. After a minute or so, during which I was afraid to look up at Cosmic, the King told me to turn around again.
“So...” He spoke slowly, “This is the mortal you want to turn.” He looked at Cosmic, “Why exactly is that? What makes her so special that you refuse to let her be faded?” He took a step towards me with his eyes still locked on Cosmic, “She certainly is a pretty one. Is that why you want her so much? Is that what you want her for?” He placed his cold finger under my chin, causing me to shiver and almost collapse. He lifted my face slightly, inspecting my neck. His eyes seemed to glow brighter as they studied the area from my chin to my collarbone, “We do not allow toys here. No distractions. You know that.” He moved his finger from my chin to my neck, feeling my pulse, which was racing. “Such a lovely mortal, it almost makes me sad that her heart will soon cease to beat. Almost.”
Finally Cosmic chimed in to defend me. “She is not a toy.” His voice was harsh, sudden, and clipped. Both the King and I turned to look at Cosmic, but I was careful to make sure it was only my head that moved. His fingers, which lingered on my pulse, restricted my movement a little bit, and I felt them pressing harder into my neck when I twisted around.
“Funny how you begin to disobey me when she enters the room. If I am not mistaken, that is the mark of a distraction, and what begins as a distraction ends as a toy.” The King dropped his hand from me, “Should I fade her now, or would you like to do the honors?” His fangs seemed bigger as he thought about sinking them into me and drinking my mortal blood. “It has been so long since I have tasted the blood of a green berry. Too long. But since she is yours I will let you taste her first.” His glare was not quite serious, as if he was enjoying what he was doing to Cosmic. “What is wrong, did you not know that bringing a mortal to my coven is like bringing a sheep to slaughter.” The King turned away from Cosmic, and me, and strutted to his desk. He pulled open a small drawer and removed a small blade. “You will do the honors.” He demanded, “I insist.” He added, reaching out and grabbing me by the hand. He held my arm so that my wrist faced upwards and was completely exposed. He laid the blade against my skin, lightly but ready to force it down at any moment. “A young vampberry like you--only a year to learn self control--may have sympathy for a mortal whose skin is unbroken, but the scent of her blood will drive you mad.”
“You are right, Ferric.” Cosmic finally conceded, “She is a toy. I brought her here because I loved her as a mortal. The love is gone, but the desire remains, even after my change. In three months she will be of age, and I will be able to change her, and you will not be disappointed by what she can do. She was a broken human, she will make a merciless vampberry when the time comes.” I kept my mouth shut as Cosmic talked. Luckily, I wasn’t stupid enough to believe that he meant what he was saying, and, though his words still hurt, I had thick enough skin to take them for as long as I had to. He must have known was he was doing, but it didn’t really matter anyway. What choice did I have? I had to trust him, because the other option was certain fading. Nothing good could come of me talking--at least I was sure of that--so I kept my mouth shut and let him weave his story. It obviously worked, since Ferric released my hand, and tossed the blade back to his desk. “I should not have lied.” Cosmic added, that part was for saving himself.
“That is what I thought.” Ferric snarled, “Next time, start with the truth. It will be much easier for all of us.” He picked up the blade that he’d thrown on his desk, and started spinning it between his fingers. “Three months. Three months is a long time to wait to turn her, but rules are rules. It is a long time to have her running around the coven, tempting all of the others. Her pulse will not go unheard. Do you understand what it means to watch her?”
Cosmic nodded, “It is a big responsibility, but you do not need to worry.”
“Her ankle had better heal by the time you turn her.” Ferric said, gently pushing on my shoulder, and knocking me out of balance. I was afraid that I was going to fall to the floor, but Cosmic was there, right behind me, ready to catch me in the blink of an eye. His arms, even if they were stone cold, were sturdy and supportive. He helped me stand up straight, and I turned to face him, wrapping my arms around his neck. I had had enough of trying to stand on my own, and since he’d already told Ferric that I was his toy, I figured that it would be okay. His arms wrapped around me, too.
“It will.” He stated.
“Good. You are both dismissed.”
*~~~~*~~~~*
After our meeting with Ferric I saw a lot more of Cosmic, but at the same time, it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t what I wanted. He had to protect me from the numerous other vampberries that wanted me, and so he stayed with me in my little room a lot. But he wasn’t quite himself. I had quickly gotten accustomed to the Cosmic that had tried to comfort me on my first day in the coven, but over the next week that Cosmic didn’t seem to come out anymore. He was distant, avoiding my touch and my eye contact. I tried to talk to him about our childhood, wanting to relive some of the good times we’d had so long ago, but he didn’t want that. He refrained from speaking of his mortal life at all, and that meant that anything that had happened more than a year before was completely off limits. I did learn, however, that this particular coven refused to turn anyone under the age of 18, since vampberries didn’t age, and it would be useless to have a bunch of immortal children running around--that was why Fir was still a mortal. I was over 18, and I was pretty sure Cosmic was lying on purpose, but even the idea that he might have forgotten how old I was stung.
The only time that he was gone physically was when one of us needed food. He left three times a day and returned with a meal for me--usually something cold and disgusting, but I ate it anyway--and he stayed out for a lot longer in the evening. I assumed that that meant he was hunting for himself, but I didn’t ask because I really didn’t want to know. Only once had I made the mistake of thinking about the number of berries that he must have faded in order to survive, but it made me feel contempt towards him, and I didn’t want that, so I pushed those thoughts away.
I was alerted to his entering the room by the sound of the huge bolt unlocking. He kept it locked whenever he was gone so that I would be safe from the others, and I didn’t try to argue. I knew that I was no match for a vampberry, and it would have been 🐸🐸🐸🐸 for me to argue and ask for it to be open. I didn’t even want it to be open, since I didn’t have anywhere else to go.
“Food.” He stated simply, laying down a plate with a cold grilled-cheese sandwich lying on it. The sound of the ceramic plate against the tile floor echoed sharply around the room, and when it faded away there was only silence. He stood in front of me, watching and waiting for me to pick up the cold sandwich and bring it to my mouth. My fingers lingered over the bread, wishing that I could feel heat rising off of it, wishing that I could know where it came from; but I couldn’t have either of those pieces of information. I just had to eat it, because my other option was to starve. “Please eat, Mint.” He begged when he realized that I was not going to do it on my own. Lowering my hand to the bread, which felt cold and almost clammy, I shook my head.
“Sit with me.” I told him. It wasn’t really a request, because I knew that it was more likely that he would refuse, but it was worth a try.
Surprisingly, he lowered himself to the ground next to me, and threw his arm around my shoulder. I suppressed a chill. Even though his touch made me cold, I wanted it. I wanted him to put his arms around me, to grab my hand, to pull me close to him. I was so happy to be able to be with him again, even if he wasn’t quite the same.
“Why won’t you talk to me?” I asked, my voice barely more than a whisper. “What’s wrong? I thought that... that we could spend all of our time together--really together.” I leaned into his shoulder, hoping to keep him from leaving while we were talking.
“I cannot do this right now. Not yet.” He said, robotically, removing his arm from my shoulder. “I really wish that I could be what you want me to be, but I cannot be.” He made a move to stand up and get away from me, but I grabbed him by the arm and pulled him back. I was sick of him walking away from me and ignoring me. I spent all day in the same room as him, but I felt just as disconnected as when I thought he was faded. “Let go.” He commanded, but his voice was softer than it should have been. “Eat your food. You need to eat.” He yanked his arm away from me, and then started smoothing out his sleeve. He didn’t look back at me.
“Why won’t you talk to me!” I asked again, “You were so nice on the first day! What changed!” My head sank in between my knees as I tried to stop the tears that were starting to threaten me. I didn’t want to cry in front of him. He didn’t show me any emotion, and I didn’t want to show him any, either. “Come back here, Cosmic.” My eyes stayed focused on the back of his head. I reached over and picked up my sandwich, poised and ready to throw it at him just to get his attention.
“I do not want you to starve. That would be a shame.” He told me, it was the closest that he had come to showing any affection towards me in days. He was walking towards his post at the door, going as far away from me as he could get without letting me off his watch. He started to open the door to step outside, but I screamed at him and he slammed it shut. “Be quiet.” He commanded, and this time he really meant it. His eyes burned holes in me when he met my face with his glare; they were glowing like spotlights.
I dropped my grilled-cheese into my lap. “I have to talk to someone.” Solemnly, I reached down and grabbed the tops of my high tops. I moved my fingers back and forth across the threads that held the material together. I couldn’t help but think of Reno as I did it. Suddenly, I felt like I would have been more comfortable with Reno than with Cosmic. I felt like I knew Reno better than I knew Cosmic, even though I’d known Cosmic for years and Reno for only days; although, at this point, those years meant close to nothing. It had been so long, it was foolish for me to think that he would be the same. That he would feel the same way about me. “Can I at least see my parents?” I still held out hope that I could find some solace in them--even though I knew that they had been vampberries for much longer, their humanity was gone and I just didn’t want to admit it. I didn’t want to admit defeat. If I was going to be locked up in the basement of a vampberry coven, I wanted to believe that I was going to gain something from it.
“Okay.” He said, quietly, “You are right. I have forgotten how important socialization is to mortals.” The glowing in his eyes subsided, and I felt comfortable standing up and approaching him. His expression softened at my limp, but he did not offer me a hand. However, he did hold the door open for me and walk slowly with me down the hallway to the room that my parents were in. He whispered to me as I walked past him, through the door, “We can’t talk here.” But it was so quiet that part of me thought that I had imagined it, and I was too afraid that I’d made it up to ask him to repeat it. Once I was past in, and out in the hallway, he spoke again, but this time at normal volume. “I will have to stay and keep watch. I want you to be prepared for that.”
“I didn’t expect anything different.” I sighed. It would be easy enough to ignore him, since it was basically like he wasn’t there anyway.
He asked me to be quiet as we walked, and I nodded, then we headed out to find my parents again. I didn’t even try to memorize the route we took, since every hallway looked exactly the same. I peered down a few as we travelled, and I couldn’t tell one from the next. It didn’t matter, anyway, since I wasn’t allowed to leave my room by myself, I just hoped that I’d feel more comfortable if I knew my way around the place. That was not going to be a possibility, though, so I gave up on it pretty quickly.
Cosmic stopped in front of a door that looked just like the one which we had found my parents behind the first time--but I couldn’t say for certain that it was the same one, since they all looked the same. He knocked twice, and was met with what I perceived to be silence, but he found some kind of answer in. He signaled to me to be quiet, which was unnecessary because I wasn’t making any noise, and then he opened the door. He stepped in before me, and then signaled for me to join him.
“Mint is here to see you.” He announced, and I felt my cheeks becoming hot. He introduced me like he was a butler and I was some sort of special guest. I tried to walk towards my parents, but he held me away from them using his arm to bar the way.
“Do not worry, we will not harm her.” My father told Cosmic, causing him to relax a bit. Cosmic stepped backwards, leaning up against the wall behind him. Watching. “It is very good to see you.” My dad told me, “It has been too long, has it not?” The way he spoke made him seem so... unhuman. None of his words seemed to flow naturally, they seemed so forced and formal, and it was exactly what I didn’t need. My parents really weren’t my parents anymore, and it was just making it worse to see that. It was like salt in the wound that Cosmic had opened when he was distant. But it was too late to back out, now, I was going to talk to my parents. I was going to fish for the parts of them that remained after their transformation.
“Why don’t we sit down.” I suggested awkwardly. Sitting seemed like a good way to make the conversation more relaxed and casual. I walked carefully to the wall behind my parents, away from Cosmic, who wasn’t part of our conversation, and sat down. I was joined quickly by my parents, who sat on either side of me. Fir wandered over to Cosmic, still not exactly comfortable with me being around. As much as I wanted to, I didn’t blame him. Who knows what the vampberries had told him about mortals, since they had to convince him to let them turn him at some point.
The silence settled in the room at the same time we did. I felt like I could have cut through the tension with a knife, and with each passing second it choked me more and more, preventing me from speaking. I wanted to soak up the time that I had with them because I needed to make up for lost time, too, and sitting around silently wasn’t getting the job done. My hands reached for the floor where if I had been outside I would have started pulling up grass, but there was no grass to occupy my idle hands. Instead, I splayed my fingers out on the cold tile.
“How have you been?” My dad finally asked. It was a pretty stupid question, but at least he was trying. But I didn’t know how to answer. They’d been gone for 10 years; 10 years when I grew up, became an adult, went through elementary school, middle school, and high school. So much had happened that they’d missed, I didn’t know how to answer the question of how I’d been. I didn’t even know if they’d understand what I said. Did they remember what emotion was like, or were they just mindless worker bees contained in the hive? Ferric had seemed to have some emotion--even if it was just cruelty and malevolence--but maybe their mortal emotions had to be erased before new vampberry ones could show up. Besides, I couldn’t tell them that I’d been sad, even though that was about as accurate as I could get about the time that they’d been gone. If they did understand emotion, and I told them that I’d been sad, they’d feel awful. If there was one thing I was sure of regarding their disappearance it was this; they didn’t chose it.
“Um... okay...” I finally answered. Part of me hoped that my dad could see through that facade, and see that I hadn’t been okay; know that I couldn’t have possibly been okay. Part of me hoped that he’d just accept the answer and move on. “I mean... I missed you guys, but life went on.” I reached out, ready to take one of each of their hands, but I stopped myself. Was it okay to touch vampberries? Would they turn on me, try to attack me or drink my blood if I touched them? I took a deep breath, and went for it. Their hands tightened around mine.
“We cannot wait until you can join us.” My mom said, “Cosmic tells us that we have to wait three months until you can be turned. It will be worth it.” Her hand squeezed mine. It made me sad that she didn’t remember when my real birthday was, but I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to stick my foot in my mouth. “There are so many worries that you can let go of once you have been turned. You will be so much happier; so much freer.” She smiled, showing me her sharp teeth.
I looked up to see Fir’s small face approaching me. He was padding softly across the room, being extremely cautious, but coming up to me by his own accord. I looked up at Cosmic, expecting him to be smiling at me, happy that Fir was finally reaching out to me, but he had a stark grimace on his face. His arms were crossed, and he looked like a shadow had settled over his face. My eyes darted back to Fir before he could realize that I’d been looking. Fir was smiling at me, so I smiled back and encouraged him to come a little bit closer. He did, talking tiny step after tiny step until I could reach out and place my hand on his face. I didn’t do that, because I didn’t want to ***** him, but it was hard to resist.
“Hey, little guy.” I cooed. His grin widened at my voice, “You remember me, Fir? We met last week. I’m your sister, Mint.” He brought my hand up so that it was within his reach, and he met me halfway. His little hand settled into mine, and his whole face brightened at the warmth. It must have been such a novel thing to him to meet another berry with natural body heat. “Yeah, I’m like you.” I told him.
“Mint.” He said. “I like you, Mint.” It made me happy to hear my name being used in conversation. It made me feel a lot closer to him, whereas Cosmic and my parents usually never said my name--though Cosmic had a few times, it just wasn’t enough. I had never understood how important the use of a name was when talking to somebody, but it made all the difference in the world.
“Maybe, after your transformation, you can tell Fir that it is not so bad to be changed.” My mom suggested, “He still has 8 years until he can be changed, but he is scared. He insists that he will not do it.” She released my hand, and pushed gently on my back, encouraging me to get closer to Fir.
“Yeah, okay.” I agreed, standing up and taking a step towards my brother. He didn’t shy away, which I was sure he would do now that I was so much taller than him. “I’m sure Cosmic can tell you it’s not so bad, right Cosmic?” I looked up to him, to find that he still looked unhappy. He responded to my expectant look with a slight shake of his head. It couldn’t have been that bad, my parents seemed so for it, they couldn’t possibly want to put both of their children through some horrible process. My smile became more fake as I looked back at Fir, “I’ll be happy to tell how what it’s like once I go through it.” I shoved my hand into his hair, and ruffled it a little.
“I am not sure.” Fir whispered. It was strange to hear such formal words coming from such a small child. I wanted nothing more than just to comfort him, so I bent down a gave him a hug. I felt him relax in my arms, and I was pretty proud of myself. I’d never thought of myself as somebody who was good at talking to--or dealing with--children.
“In fact--” I said, straightening up from Fir, “--well, I mean, I don’t really know if this would work, so just hear me out.” I walked past Fir, closing the gap between Cosmic and I. His expression didn’t soften, not even a little bit, as I came towards him. It made me falter a little bit that he already seemed to unreceptive to what I was saying, and he didn’t even know what it was yet. “I mean, you might disagree, I don’t really know how this works, but I was thinking--”
“No.”
“Come on, hear me out, okay.” I pleaded, bring my hands together in front of my chest. I tried to look straight into Cosmic’s eyes, but he looked away. “Just let me say what I want to sa--”
“No. I know what you are going to ask, and it is not going to happen.” He insisted.
I was not going down without arguing my case a little, “You don’t even know what it is yet.”
“I have a pretty good idea.”
“Why can’t you turn me now?” I asked. Cosmic shook his head. “Come on. Three months won’t really make a difference. Just turn me now.” I lifted my arm towards him, veins up. I bit down on my lip and widened my eyes, a technique that usually seemed to work for the girls I’d gone to school with--for getting guys to do what they wanted, that is, not for getting a vampberry to turn them.
“I do not think you understand.” He told me, with a heavy air of scolding in his voice. “I cannot simply break the rules. I am not a rogue vampberry, there are rules in this coven and they will be followed.” His expression was hard and unwavering. I opened my mouth to protest again, but Cosmic stopped me, discretely reaching out and touching my hand with his. I froze. He leaned in, bringing his mouth very close to my ear. A small, cold breath was released as he spoke, so silently I wasn’t sure if I was imagining that he was talking to me. “Follow my lead.” Was what I heard, but it didn’t not prepare me for what happened next. Nothing could have prepared me.
He leaned away from me for just a second, then he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close to him, bring his lips to mine.
Haha I saw the back of his head as well and I was like "jeezus Crimson you get around" and then I saw it wasn't Crimson and XD. Blood colored vampberries are the worst. Like, for some reason it really makes them more evil (at least, it does to me). Ferric is an awesome name.
Cosmic just why do you make my emotions hurt ;__;. I hope he can get in touch with his inner human/feeling side soon because like. That ship. I cannot watch it sink before it sails. :C
Haha I saw the back of his head as well and I was like "jeezus Crimson you get around" and then I saw it wasn't Crimson and XD. Blood colored vampberries are the worst. Like, for some reason it really makes them more evil (at least, it does to me). Ferric is an awesome name.
Cosmic just why do you make my emotions hurt ;__;. I hope he can get in touch with his inner human/feeling side soon because like. That ship. I cannot watch it sink before it sails. :C
Nah, I wouldn't take your character without asking. But, I mean, how could I not make the leader of the vampberries the same color as blood? It's just too fitting to resist. Thank ya.
I want to make a chapter, but instead I've been watching Doctor Who and Sherlock. I'm not sure how long it'll be before a chapter is made, at this point. I'm a little addicted to Netflix.
I want to make a chapter, but instead I've been watching Doctor Who and Sherlock. I'm not sure how long it'll be before a chapter is made, at this point. I'm a little addicted to Netflix.
That happens to me all the time! "Hmm, I should write a chapt...Hey, is that Supernatural on Netflix?" *forgets about writing*
I want to make a chapter, but instead I've been watching Doctor Who and Sherlock. I'm not sure how long it'll be before a chapter is made, at this point. I'm a little addicted to Netflix.
That happens to me all the time! "Hmm, I should write a chapt...Hey, is that Supernatural on Netflix?" *forgets about writing*
I wish you luck! xD
Oh, yeah, that reminds me. I also want to watch all of Supernatural, Firefly, Merlin, and Game of Thrones before summer is over. (in addition to the remaining 3 episodes of Sherlock and then... 70 or so of Doctor Who) I told myself I was gonna watch all of those over this summer... and I didn't. Oops. I mean... obviously I'm not gonna get all that done. But a girl can dream
His mouth was cold and hard pressed against mine. His hands around my waist sent shivers down my spine. I wanted to pull away, but I also didn’t want to pull away. I wanted to get away from him, but I also wanted to stay there in his arms forever. The internal battle was raging so hard that I couldn’t respond when he finally released me from his grip; I simply stumbled backwards slightly, only to be caught by his hand and pulled in again. I felt the words that I wanted to say, the questions that I wanted to ask, struggling to make their way out of my mouth, but failing. I could hardly breathe, let alone speak, but I wanted to know what in the world had just happened to make Cosmic do that. He hadn’t shown any emotion, and then he kissed me out of the blue. I practically had whiplash.
He took me by the hand and pulled me out of the room, where my parents and little brother stood, watching in silent confusion. My feet didn’t want to listen to me, in the same way that my words didn’t want to listen, but I was forced to follow behind him, stumbling the whole way. His grip was tight; tight enough that there was no way that I could remove my hand from it, but also loose enough that he wasn’t hurting me at all. Still, I was a bit worried about where we were going.
We sped down a couple of hallways, which could have been the same ones we’d taken to get to my parents from my room or they could have been totally different. Then we rounded a corner and Cosmic stopped abruptly by a door. He mouthed an apology, and before I had time to ask what for he was kissing me again, this time while pressing me up against the wall behind me. I felt one of his hands behind my back, and I heard the other fumbling with the doorknob behind me.
“Start taking off my jacket.” He muttered, pulling his face away just enough so he wasn’t breathing into my mouth when he spoke. I reached for his jacket, and started pushing it down his arms. He stopped me when he got the door open. I heard it swing and hit the wall behind it, and then I was being pulled into the room.
As soon as the door closed behind us everything stopped. He pushed me away from him, and fixed his jacket, afraid to look me in the eyes. He made sure that it was locked and that nobody could see into the room. Meanwhile, I was completely lost. I sat down in a chair while my brain continued to race, looking for an explanation somewhere. If it weren’t for the fact that Cosmic had positioned himself purposefully across the room from me, I might have thought that he intended to go farther, which scared me. Instead, he was leaning up against the wall, with his fist and forehead pressed against the stone.
“What was that?” I asked with a raspy voice. I held my hands together over my heart, which was still beating wildly out of control. I was trying to stop it, remembering what Cosmic had told me about keeping it quiet, I didn’t want to attract unwanted vampberry attention because of the blood surging through me. It was hard to be calm, though, with all of the fear and the excitement swirling around in me.
“I had to do something. They were getting to you.” Cosmic stated firmly, “I shouldn’t have let you talk to your parents. I should have known that they’d want you.” He didn’t turn around, he didn’t let me see him as he talked.
“Of course they want me, I’m their kid.” I scoffed, unsure why he thought they wouldn’t want me. Had he thought that they’d be so distanced from me that they wouldn’t even care? But why would he bring me to them if he’d thought it was going to hurt like that?
“No. They want to turn you. They want you to stay here with them, Mint.” He clarified, but it didn’t do much in the way of making things clearer for me. “They want to make you like them, to steal your humanity away from you. Didn’t you hear what they were trying to say to you?” There was a slight glow reflecting off the wall in front of him; reflecting the light from his eyes. He was angry.
“I don’t understand, I thought you wanted to turn me.” Hadn’t he told Ferric that we just had to wait three months? He seemed like he had wanted it then.
“No, Mint, I care for you more than that. They’re just selfish. I would never condemn you to a life like this. You have so much to live for, so much more that you can do with your life. I wouldn’t be right to force you to stay here and be a monster.” Finally he turned around, and his eyes were bright like two little suns on his face. He was absolutely livid, but I didn’t know if it was with me or with my parents. Either way, I didn’t want to cross him more, but I wanted answers.
“So... you don’t want me here?” I asked.
“Mint, you misunderstand. I’d love more that anything to have you here with me forever. I’d love for us to be able to spend the rest of eternity together, but that would be selfish of me. You are so much better than this life. You’re not a killer. You’re not a monster.” He started to approach me, but he stopped, staying distanced from me. He was afraid that he was going to hurt me in his anger.
“You’re not a monster, either.” I whispered, but I knew that he wouldn’t accept it. I even knew that he really was a monster, but I didn’t want it to be true. It seemed like it would have been so easy to reach up to him, to get close to him, to kiss him again--which I longed to do--but that would have been so dangerous. That would have been asking to be sucked dry, and I wasn’t going to do that.
“Mint. No. I am a monster. Everyone here is a monster and a killer. We cannot be saved, but that’s okay because we don’t deserve to be saved, we all have blood on our hands, Mint, so much blood you cannot even begin to imagine. You, on the other hand, deserve a better life than this. I’m not going to turn you, Mint, I’m going to help you get out of here.” He backed away from me as the light in his eyes flared up.
I froze. “Can’t--can’t they hear you! They’re gonna fade you for saying that!” I kept my voice low, even though I knew that if they’d heard already then it was too late to be quiet; and I didn’t know how they could have possibly not heard. If a vampberry could hear my heartbeat from anywhere in the compound, then they could hear Cosmic yelling about helping me escape.
“It’s okay, Mint, they can’t hear us in this room, it’s for Ferric’s meetings that he doesn’t want overheard. That’s why I brought you here. We can talk freely in here, as long as they don’t think we’re talking.” He looked away from me, and I was sure--if he meant what I think he meant--that his face would have flushed if it could.
“Oh...” I breathed, “Well... what if I don’t want to go? What if I want to stay here with you, my parents, and Fir? You don’t get to decide what I do with my life.”
“No, you’re right, I don’t. But I can tell you what this is like, and explain to you why you don’t want this. I remember what it’s like to be human, Mint, I remember what it’s like to feel warm wrapped up in a blanket, to eat your favorite food, to love. I remember what it was like when I could hug Fir without him shivering at my touch--and I feel it with you, too. I know that I feel cold and dead to you, Mint, and I hate it. I want to be able to wrap you up and hold you in my warmth, but I have none.” His gaze was fixed on his wrist, where his fingers played with the hem of his sleeve, pulling the button in and out of it’s hole, rubbing the material between his thumb and forefinger.
Thinking about the coldness of the contact of his skin made me shiver. He saw it, and I saw pain and frustration flicker across his eyes. I could tell him that I didn’t mind the cold, but we both would have known that was a lie. Living beings desire warmth and comfort in a touch, and Cosmic couldn’t give that to me. “But... but... I’m sure you can still love, Cosmic.” I said it because I thought it was true. He seemed to love Fir a lot, and he seemed to at least care for me. Maybe it wasn’t clear to him how much that came across to other people.
“The love I show is all because of memory. Every bit of affection is forced, because I remember what it felt like, and because I want to feel it again, but it’s not the same. This is not the feeling that I once had, and with each day it fades from me more. Every second that I’m a vampberry I feel a shred of my humanity slipping away, and it’ll keep going until I’m nothing but a monster. Eventually I’ll be heartless and cruel like Ferric. I’ll have no remorse for the lives I take in order to eat. Everyday I’m dying more, it’s only a matter of time before the poison takes over everything--you can see it in your parents; they struggle to find the humanity buried deep inside them. It’s been covered by layers of stone in their hearts, cooled to the point where it’s nearly unrecognizable to them.” The glowing in his eyes subsided to darkness and pain. It was like a shadow that passed over his face, but it lingered. I no longer felt the same fear to touch him, but something still held me back.
“I don’t want to leave you guys. I spent my whole life wishing that I could be with the people that I love again, and now I’m here and you’re telling me I have to go away.” The words were crackly and quiet, soft enough that I had a hope that they’d gone unnoticed.
“Mint--” Cosmic spoke, “--I know this isn’t ideal. Trust me when I say that I want you here, but if you really knew what it was like you’d be charging at the opportunity to leave. Knowing what I do now, I’d rather be out there, even if it meant a 9-to-5 office job in cubeville and a boring life in suburbia.” His anger had all but melted away, and he was beginning to make an emotional plea to me.
“But--”
“No ‘buts’ Mint. I will not turn you. I will not be the one to steal your life away from you. I won’t let your parents do it, either, if I can help it. You and Fir need to get out of here.” Stepping towards me he placed both of his hands on my shoulder and looked right into my eyes, “I have this all planned out, Mint, you just need to follow my lead. Why do you think I told them that you turned 18 in three months? I know that’s not true, Mint, I know exactly when your birthday is--I never forgot it--but in two or three months they’ll stop watching you, and then I can help you slip out.” He smiled, waiting for me to respond. It was a lopsided smile, friendly, patient, anxious. It was the vision that I’d always had of him whenever I imagined him as an adult with me.
He remembered my birthday. That shouldn’t have mattered to me as much as it did, but it just proved that it wasn’t stupid for me to have cared about him all those years. I didn’t forget him, and he didn’t forget me, either. We didn’t know that we’d be reunited, but we held on to each other so tight, it had to be destiny.
I stood up, causing his hands to fall from my shoulders, and leaned into him.
Pulling his head in with both of my hands, I kissed him, ignoring the cold that radiated through my body. It wasn’t exactly what I thought it was going to be, kissing Cosmic, because I’d never once imagined that he’d be a vampberry, undead and freezing, but that’s who he was now and it didn’t matter to me. He was still Cosmic, and I still loved him.
And I let him know that. He needed to know.
“I love you, too, Mint. That’s why I have to let you go.”
*~~~~*~~~~*
I didn’t want to leave Cosmic and my family, but I did understand that he was very serious about what he was doing. Under no circumstances was he going to let me stay there with the coven, and the more I thought about it, the more I realized that he did have a point. He did know better than I did about being a vampberry. He knew what it was like to be stuck there in the camp. It was also true that I did not have the heart to kill, which would make it extremely difficult for me to live as a vampberry, because starvation, while it wouldn’t kill a vampberry, would be extremely miserable for one.
But that didn’t mean that I was happy about leaving.
Then Cosmic presented me with an idea. It was a genius idea, that I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t thought of before he suggested it; I could bring Fir with me. I could save him, spare him the same fate that Cosmic was sparing me. That really pushed me over the edge and, reluctantly, I agreed to Cosmic’s plan. I agreed to leave the compound, my parents, and my best friend.
My job over the next few weeks was to get close to Fir, to make him trust me. I needed him to trust me enough to run with me, away from his parents and the only life he’d ever known. The problem was that he had to trust me, but he couldn’t know what we were doing, because Cosmic and I were both sure that if he knew that I was taking him away, he’d never go. I felt awful about tricking him like that, but I wanted to save him, and that desire to better his life trumped the guilt of pulling him away from his family. I had to convince him that I was somebody he could trust his life with, but for that to happen I had to believe that I was somebody he could trust his life with, and it was hard for me to believe that. I’d never been responsible for another person in all of my 18 years of life. I’d never been responsible for a cat or a dog, or even a fish, I had absolutely no experience with keeping anybody else alive. That made my confidence shaky, but I had to hide it for Fir’s sake. For him, I had to push all of my doubts and insecurities aside; his life depended on it. I pretty quickly figured out that if I wanted to hold myself accountable for getting out of there, I had to do it for Fir, because I still didn’t really want to leave. No matter what Cosmic said, how hard he argued that I couldn’t live there, or how many good reasons he had that I had to leave, part of me wanted to stay there with him. I didn’t want to give up the people who I’d spend the latter half of my life wishing to be reunited with.
So I latched on to Fir. I knew that it wouldn't be easy to get him to trust me as much as I needed him to, and I couldn’t blame him for that. He’d known me for so little time, and I was so different than what he was used to, that he was unsure about me. There was one good sign, something that was promising to me, and that was that Fir was curious about me. At first I couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad kind of curiosity, but I soon realized that he wanted to get to know me. He wanted to get to know me because I was his sister, and he had spent his whole life not knowing that I existed, and not knowing what it meant to have a sister, but he had one now, and he wanted to explore the idea.
“Where did you grow up?” Fir asked me. I was happy that he was finally comfortable enough with me to start questioning my life, since I’d spent a lot of time getting to know him.
I knew that I had to be careful with my answers. I couldn’t say anything without being overheard by everyone, and one false step, one leak of too much of the wrong kind of information, could lead to my immediate fading. I was walking a fine line, having to tell Fir enough but also keep enough a secret, but Cosmic had gone over this with me. He and I had made up a few details to fill in the things that I had to leave blank for my safety. “I grew up in a town not far from here.” I told Fir, “I lived with a bunch of mortals. In fact, I didn’t even know vampberries existed until I came here.”
“If you’re my sister...” He started, and then stopped to think about his question. “... then... my parents are you parents...? Didn’t know know they were vampberries?” This was not a question that I had prepared for. I stumbled over my words for a minute before I could come up with something that I thought would be an acceptable answer--both for Fir and for the vampberries around me.
“They... uh... they hadn’t been turned yet before they... uh... came here.” I stammered, hoping desperately they he would ask me why they came without me. Unfortunately, he did ask. “They... uh... well, they didn’t know that they were going to come here... it was really short notice, y’know, and I... umm... I was staying with my mom’s friend when they left. That’s why... I... didn’t... come...”
“I heard them talking, once.” Fir told me, quietly. He motioned for me to lean in, so that he could whisper it to me. I knew it wouldn’t make a difference, but I didn’t know how to explain that to him--or even if that would be a good idea. I leaned in, pressing my hand against the cold, dirty floor to hold myself up. “I heard--” He whispered, “They said ‘he knows too much.’ It was when they faded Cosmic’s dad. I was scared that they would fade m- our dad, too.” He leaned away from me, his eyes wide and his expression clearing conveying the fear that he felt and the fear that he still had of the vampberries.
“Well,” I started, in an attempt to downplay what he’d just said to those who were eavesdropping on us, “Our dad is a smart guy. Did you know that he used to be a scientist before he came here?” Fir nodded, but my attempts at comforting him failed. He still looked just as scared. Suddenly I felt like my heart had stopped as the rest of Fir’s sentence sunk into my brain. It was when they faded Cosmic’s dad. Cosmic’s dad was faded. Aside from the obvious, that meant that Fir knew what vampberries did. He knew that they took lives, and it scared me that he was able to speak about it--even if it wasn’t too easily that he spoke about it, it was still frightening that he could tell me at all. I swallowed, trying to relax my face so that I could look brave for Fir.
“A scientist?” Fir asked, quietly, “What kind of stuff did he do?”
“He studied our family history.” I told him, “He researched our grandparents, great-grandparents, great-great-grandparents, and even further back, too. He learned about where they came from, where they lived, who they married. I don’t know much about his work, but he seemed to think it was really interesting. He did other stuff, too, but that’s the one I remember. The genealogy.”
“Grandparents?” Fir asked. For a moment I thought that maybe he didn’t know what grandparents were, since he’d been cooped up all his life. In fact, I thought there might have been a lot of things that he didn’t know. He’d never gotten a chance to go to school or talk to people his own age, I assumed that not a lot was explained to him. Besides, they had to keep him in the dark about the outside world if they wanted him to accept his future trapped in the vampberry settlement. “I know my... my... great-grandparents--our great-grandparents.” He smiled at me, looking very proud of himself for the little tidbit of information.
He knew our great-grandparents? That had to mean that they were vampberries, and that they lived here; in the same coven as my parents. I felt a little sad that I hadn’t been introduced to them, not that I expected them to know who I was, but the fact that they were family made me wish that they’d reached out to me. Although, if there was one thing that Cosmic had made abundantly clear to me it was that the longer you were a vampberry, the more monstrous you were, so maybe they just couldn’t care anymore, and I guess I couldn’t really blame them for that. It wasn’t their fault that they’d been turned, and it wasn’t their fault that it had been so long.
“Does our dad know our great-grandparents?” I asked, thinking that maybe he would have been happy to get to know some of the people who he’d been studying.
Fir nodded solemnly, his lips tightening into somewhat of a frown. “Only great-gramma is here.” He told me, “I forget Ferric is not grampa. Daddy dislikes her. When I was little he said she is the reason that we live here.” His head dropped, so that his eyes were on the ground, and somewhere that I couldn’t see them. “He said it was good, but I remember him being sad when he told me that.”
“Oh. I’m sure he meant what he said.” I wasn’t sure. If Fir had been young when our dad told him that, maybe our dad had still been able to show emotion. Maybe he was trying to fool Fir for safety reasons, just like I was doing.
“Probably.” Fir sighed, “I wanna stop talking. Can we play a game, now?” He waited for me to nod, which I did, and then he stood up. I wondered where he was going to find a game to play in a dark, dank dungeon like the one we were trapped in, but he knew where to go. There was a small, dark, wood chest on the other side of the room. He walked over to it and flipped the lid up, leaning inside and coming back out holding a little space ship. It was red and white, oval shaped, with wings jutting out of the bottom. “This one is my favorite.” He told me, “Ferric bought it for me.” He ran his fingers along the edges of the wings. Thinking about Ferric seemed to be a good thing for Fir, a small smiled appeared on his face when he brought him up. Meanwhile, I tried to hide my disgust at the mention of Ferric’s name, remembering how he treated me when Cosmic brought me to meet him.
He walked up to me and sat down, holding the little rocket in both hands. He sat staring at it for a moment, as if considering his options, and then he held it out to me. I shook my head, “Don’t you want to play with it?” I asked.
“We can take turns.” He told me, pushing it towards me again. Reluctantly, I grabbed it from him, not really sure what to do with it. I didn’t want to let him down, and be boring, and I wanted to be somebody who he could be close to, somebody he could relate with. I closed my eyes, thinking of the days spent playing with Cosmic in my backyard. The good old days, when the biggest worry I had was losing an action figure in the sandbox.
Even pulling forward on the memories of being a kid wasn’t enough. I couldn’t think of a single thing to do with the little rocket, so I passed it back to Fir. He didn’t want to take it back at first, but eventually he relented. “It’s your toy.” I told him, which was what caused him to finally take it from me.
He started to play with it, and he reminded me of Cosmic when we were little. I soaked up his innocence and happiness, and then closed my eyes, remembering the time that Cosmic and I were just like that. If I concentrated hard enough I could picture my backyard. The trees rustling in the slight wind, the swings drifting freely, Cosmic and I kneeling on the dirt, digging up worms. Once he told me that you could split a worm in half and that it would stay alive, but he wouldn’t do it. He didn’t want to risk killing the worm. But now--now he killed berries. He had to, because of what he was, but it was so different from what he used to be. Suddenly, my memory changed, it became dark, cold, it sent a chill down my spine. The Cosmic in my imagination cut the worm in half, then turned to me with glowing eyes and chalky skin.
I opened my eyes, covering my mouth to keep from screaming. My eyes focused back on Fir, trying to bring my concentration back to the present, back to my little brother who stood in front of me and had kept his humanity despite growing up in a coven of vampberries. It was not a feat that I felt I could have accomplished, but Fir clearly clung tightly to life. He had never known anything else, he didn’t have something better to compare it to, but I wanted to give him something better.
A voice pulled me away from Fir, “Are you alright?” I turned to look, though I recognized who it was just by the sound; it was Cosmic, who was standing just inside the doorway, with the door closing behind him. “I heard your heart speed up.” He admitted, hanging his head a little, like he was ashamed to be concerned over something so small. I felt kind of stupid, because he had heard my heartrate speed up from another room, and I didn’t even hear him enter the room until he spoke.
“I’m fine.” I told him, “Fir and I were just playing with his rocket ship toy. Nothing to be concerned about.” I smiled at him, and he started to turn away to leave the room. I didn’t want him to leave, “Wait!” I called, stopping him in his tracks. “Maybe... maybe you could stay and play with us.” I knew there was a chance that he’d say no, that he’d tell me that vampberries were supposed to play with toys, that he couldn’t be too close to me, but he didn’t give me an excuse. He smiled, and walked towards us, Fir and I, his steps smooth and quick. He knelt down beside us, making sure to be close to me, but without our skin touching. He had explained to me that we could show sexual attraction, but it was too dangerous to show simple affection, because that would alert the others to his lingering humanity. We would all be safer if they believed that his emotions had already mostly faded away.
“Okay. For a minute.” He said, settling into position on the floor next to me.
Watching Fir in front of us, playing with his toy, I couldn’t help but imagine that this was, in a way, how our life was supposed to turn out. Only, Fir would have a little bit of pink, too, and we’d be older by the time he was 10. But part of me imagined Cosmic and myself as Fir’s parents, and I couldn’t hold back a smile. Even if it was only in my imagination, it felt right to sit there next to Cosmic watching Fir. I had to be careful, though, not to get too attached to the idea. If Cosmic wanted me out of the coven, it was likely that one of two things would happen. 1. I’d never see him again. Although that was my least favorite option, it was the one that seemed most likely. That was why I pushed it aside and came up with another option. 2. Cosmic would send me away, and then escape to be with me. That one was more dangerous, and would probably involve a lot of running and hiding. Who knew it our lives could ever be normal if we had to run away, and that wouldn’t be a life I’d be inclined to bring a child into, which was a an idea that disheartened me a little.
The thing was, though, that I would be okay with a life of running and hiding, if it meant that I could be with Cosmic once and for all. All I really needed was him. If I could be happy as a human prisoner in a vampberry coven just because of him, surely I’d be able to be happy on the run with him. The problem was that I didn’t know if he felt the same way.
My focus was pulled away from Fir for a minute by Cosmic’s gentle, cold touch on my arm. It was just a small nudge of his elbow against mine, but it immediately called my attention to him. My eyes left Fir, and his rocket, and shifted to Cosmic, whose gaze changed, and hardened, once my view reached him.
“Would you like to come with me to another room?” He asked, cryptically. “You can see your brother again another time.”
“What do yo--Oh. Oh. Um... yeah... yeah, sure.” I stuttered, hoping that he was asking me to go with him to discuss our plan. I had my fingers mentally crossed that he would tell me just how he planned to come along, but I knew that was a long shot. It wasn’t a good idea for me to get my hopes up, but it was already too late. I wanted him to come with us, and there was no way of making my heart let go of that idea. Standing up, I turned to Fir, who had set his rocket down on the ground and was looking at me md Cosmic with slight confusion. “I’ll be back, okay?” I said, smiling at him. He nodded, and turned his attention back to his toy. He seemed a little less enthusiastic to play with it because Cosmic and I were leaving, and I felt bad; like I was abandoning him somehow. If only he could know that it was exactly the opposite; I was saving him.
By the time I turned away from Fir, Cosmic was already standing up and waiting for me at the door. As I approached him, he pushed the big, wooden door open, holding it for me, and then following me out. The click of the locked sounded, and the hallways was cut-off from the light of the room that Fir lived in. I waited in the hall for him to walk past me--briskly and without emotion, not so much as sparing me a glance--and then I followed him. I had learned that it was best to just let him lead me, because I was not going to understand the way the tunnels were laid out, especially not between now and when he would make me leave.
He opened the door for me again when we reached the room where we usually met. I smiled at him when he did it, but I wasn’t offended when he didn’t respond. He couldn’t. Although, it surprised me that he could--as a vampberry--be more considerate than a lot of guys.
I walked in and sat down, relaxing and sinking down into the chair as much as possible. I looked up at Cosmic, expecting his usual loosening and displaying of emotion, but I found none. His face was a blank slate, and his hands were fists at his sides. He looked just as distant as when we were out where we could be seen. That was enough to freak me out a little. The first thought I had was ‘Did something go wrong?’ I sat up, about to ask him what had happened, but he spoke before me.
Comments
ohmygod that is amazing.
Can I put that on the front page?
Haha, of course! ^_^
The Landon Legacy Wordpress // Forums|
Chasing Rainbows: Wordpress // Forums
What a great first fanart
I totally agree, that fanart made my day! So funny!
I also wanted to mention to you that you make REALLY good poses! Which I will be downloading as soon as possible.
BUT AHH FIR IS ADORABLE.
I kinda wanted to smack Cosmic when he was like "alright stop hugging" because like excuse me that was a moment and you just ruined it.
Ah my jeez when Reno realizes I bet he will be flipping tables and chairs and anything else he can find.
Ahh I'm excited for your next update now.
Amazing chapter
Thank you! Pose making is super fun, but it's so much work. I'm glad it's appreciated! ^__^
Well, she was a bit scared and confused at first. But she got it.
You'll see why he acts the way he does next chapter when he takes her to go talk to the King.
Yup. It's not gonna be good.
Me toooooo! Hopefully I can make it in the next couple of days, but I'm not really sure. I have to do college apps right now, because they just opened and I want to get them out of the way.
Thank you!
Limping down the hall was difficult, to say the least. In those heels, I couldn’t put any weight on that foot--and here I was thinking that it was getting better--so I grabbed onto Cosmic’s arm to hold myself up. If he were alive, I would have been able to feel the warmth of his arm comforting me as we walked to see his leader. I would have felt the taut muscles shifting beneath his skin as he moved his arm. Instead, he just felt like a rock. Even as I felt his movements, it was just like he were a moving boulder. It was not comforting in the least.
“How much farther?” I whined, “Can I take these off, at least until I get there?” I hoped that Cosmic would stop to talk to me, but he kept going. He just kept speed walking down the hall.
“No. We are almost there.” His voice was so formal, it wasn’t at all like when he’d first come to me in that dark room. “Just another turn here.” He explained, steering me down another dark hallway. Even in the dark I could see a large door waiting for us at the other end. Looming. As we approached it, it seemed to grow disproportionately from everything around it, until it towered over us. Cosmic reached for it, pulling his arm away from my grip, and set his hand on the handle. “Are you ready?” He asked. He actually did wait for me to nod before swinging the huge doors away from us, exposing us to the King’s throne room.
It was dark in the throne room, the only light emanating from a few candles scattered about the room. It flickered and jumped, creating a spooky aura that filled the air--which was accompanied by the general dead feeling that came from the vampberries--making me feel like I was stuck inside a very bad Spooky Day special. Only, this wasn’t a TV special, it was reality. I took a deep breath, and a loud swallow, and stepped forward into the room. My heels were ridiculously loud against the floor, especially in the absence of all the regular noises. The whirr of heating and cooling units was gone; vampberries didn’t need to worry about the temperature. There was not a single sound of breathing in the room, other than mine, which created more than it’s fair share of noise. Vampberries were exceptionally quiet creatures, that much was clear.
In the silence even my ears were able to pick up on the sound of Cosmic’s shoes as he walked away from the door, and the thump of the door as it shut. I expected him to place a comforting hand on my shoulder or back as he approached me, to give me a sign that it was all going to be okay. I braced myself for the cold that his hand would bring; but it never came. I knew that he was standing there, right behind me, but he was not making a single motion to touch me. It must have been forbidden; vampberry to human contact, that would have been the only thing that kept him so far away from me when there were others around. Steeling myself in position, I hoped that I could keep my balance for long enough, and that my ankle wouldn’t give out while I was standing there in front of the King.
The King stood from his desk, placing his hands flat against the top. A sickening smile spread across his face, exposing his fangs for my viewing pleasure, letting me know not to cross him because it wouldn’t end well for me. Not that I needed a reminder.
When he felt he’d gotten the message across to me, he stepped away from the desk, and closer to me. His fangs stayed exposed as he looked me up and down, his eyes tracing every part of me--and lingering where I didn’t want them to linger. He stuck out his hand, index finger extended, and started swirling his finger. When I didn’t catch on he barked at me to spin around. I inched my way around, taking careful steps, and I was able to mask my expressions of pain pretty well. He commanded me to stop once I’d turned 180 degrees, so I did, knowing exactly what he was doing. After a minute or so, during which I was afraid to look up at Cosmic, the King told me to turn around again.
“So...” He spoke slowly, “This is the mortal you want to turn.” He looked at Cosmic, “Why exactly is that? What makes her so special that you refuse to let her be faded?” He took a step towards me with his eyes still locked on Cosmic, “She certainly is a pretty one. Is that why you want her so much? Is that what you want her for?” He placed his cold finger under my chin, causing me to shiver and almost collapse. He lifted my face slightly, inspecting my neck. His eyes seemed to glow brighter as they studied the area from my chin to my collarbone, “We do not allow toys here. No distractions. You know that.” He moved his finger from my chin to my neck, feeling my pulse, which was racing. “Such a lovely mortal, it almost makes me sad that her heart will soon cease to beat. Almost.”
Finally Cosmic chimed in to defend me. “She is not a toy.” His voice was harsh, sudden, and clipped. Both the King and I turned to look at Cosmic, but I was careful to make sure it was only my head that moved. His fingers, which lingered on my pulse, restricted my movement a little bit, and I felt them pressing harder into my neck when I twisted around.
“Funny how you begin to disobey me when she enters the room. If I am not mistaken, that is the mark of a distraction, and what begins as a distraction ends as a toy.” The King dropped his hand from me, “Should I fade her now, or would you like to do the honors?” His fangs seemed bigger as he thought about sinking them into me and drinking my mortal blood. “It has been so long since I have tasted the blood of a green berry. Too long. But since she is yours I will let you taste her first.” His glare was not quite serious, as if he was enjoying what he was doing to Cosmic. “What is wrong, did you not know that bringing a mortal to my coven is like bringing a sheep to slaughter.” The King turned away from Cosmic, and me, and strutted to his desk. He pulled open a small drawer and removed a small blade. “You will do the honors.” He demanded, “I insist.” He added, reaching out and grabbing me by the hand. He held my arm so that my wrist faced upwards and was completely exposed. He laid the blade against my skin, lightly but ready to force it down at any moment. “A young vampberry like you--only a year to learn self control--may have sympathy for a mortal whose skin is unbroken, but the scent of her blood will drive you mad.”
“You are right, Ferric.” Cosmic finally conceded, “She is a toy. I brought her here because I loved her as a mortal. The love is gone, but the desire remains, even after my change. In three months she will be of age, and I will be able to change her, and you will not be disappointed by what she can do. She was a broken human, she will make a merciless vampberry when the time comes.” I kept my mouth shut as Cosmic talked. Luckily, I wasn’t stupid enough to believe that he meant what he was saying, and, though his words still hurt, I had thick enough skin to take them for as long as I had to. He must have known was he was doing, but it didn’t really matter anyway. What choice did I have? I had to trust him, because the other option was certain fading. Nothing good could come of me talking--at least I was sure of that--so I kept my mouth shut and let him weave his story. It obviously worked, since Ferric released my hand, and tossed the blade back to his desk. “I should not have lied.” Cosmic added, that part was for saving himself.
“That is what I thought.” Ferric snarled, “Next time, start with the truth. It will be much easier for all of us.” He picked up the blade that he’d thrown on his desk, and started spinning it between his fingers. “Three months. Three months is a long time to wait to turn her, but rules are rules. It is a long time to have her running around the coven, tempting all of the others. Her pulse will not go unheard. Do you understand what it means to watch her?”
Cosmic nodded, “It is a big responsibility, but you do not need to worry.”
“Her ankle had better heal by the time you turn her.” Ferric said, gently pushing on my shoulder, and knocking me out of balance. I was afraid that I was going to fall to the floor, but Cosmic was there, right behind me, ready to catch me in the blink of an eye. His arms, even if they were stone cold, were sturdy and supportive. He helped me stand up straight, and I turned to face him, wrapping my arms around his neck. I had had enough of trying to stand on my own, and since he’d already told Ferric that I was his toy, I figured that it would be okay. His arms wrapped around me, too.
“It will.” He stated.
“Good. You are both dismissed.”
*~~~~*~~~~*
After our meeting with Ferric I saw a lot more of Cosmic, but at the same time, it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t what I wanted. He had to protect me from the numerous other vampberries that wanted me, and so he stayed with me in my little room a lot. But he wasn’t quite himself. I had quickly gotten accustomed to the Cosmic that had tried to comfort me on my first day in the coven, but over the next week that Cosmic didn’t seem to come out anymore. He was distant, avoiding my touch and my eye contact. I tried to talk to him about our childhood, wanting to relive some of the good times we’d had so long ago, but he didn’t want that. He refrained from speaking of his mortal life at all, and that meant that anything that had happened more than a year before was completely off limits. I did learn, however, that this particular coven refused to turn anyone under the age of 18, since vampberries didn’t age, and it would be useless to have a bunch of immortal children running around--that was why Fir was still a mortal. I was over 18, and I was pretty sure Cosmic was lying on purpose, but even the idea that he might have forgotten how old I was stung.
The only time that he was gone physically was when one of us needed food. He left three times a day and returned with a meal for me--usually something cold and disgusting, but I ate it anyway--and he stayed out for a lot longer in the evening. I assumed that that meant he was hunting for himself, but I didn’t ask because I really didn’t want to know. Only once had I made the mistake of thinking about the number of berries that he must have faded in order to survive, but it made me feel contempt towards him, and I didn’t want that, so I pushed those thoughts away.
I was alerted to his entering the room by the sound of the huge bolt unlocking. He kept it locked whenever he was gone so that I would be safe from the others, and I didn’t try to argue. I knew that I was no match for a vampberry, and it would have been 🐸🐸🐸🐸 for me to argue and ask for it to be open. I didn’t even want it to be open, since I didn’t have anywhere else to go.
“Food.” He stated simply, laying down a plate with a cold grilled-cheese sandwich lying on it. The sound of the ceramic plate against the tile floor echoed sharply around the room, and when it faded away there was only silence. He stood in front of me, watching and waiting for me to pick up the cold sandwich and bring it to my mouth. My fingers lingered over the bread, wishing that I could feel heat rising off of it, wishing that I could know where it came from; but I couldn’t have either of those pieces of information. I just had to eat it, because my other option was to starve. “Please eat, Mint.” He begged when he realized that I was not going to do it on my own. Lowering my hand to the bread, which felt cold and almost clammy, I shook my head.
“Sit with me.” I told him. It wasn’t really a request, because I knew that it was more likely that he would refuse, but it was worth a try.
Surprisingly, he lowered himself to the ground next to me, and threw his arm around my shoulder. I suppressed a chill. Even though his touch made me cold, I wanted it. I wanted him to put his arms around me, to grab my hand, to pull me close to him. I was so happy to be able to be with him again, even if he wasn’t quite the same.
“Why won’t you talk to me?” I asked, my voice barely more than a whisper. “What’s wrong? I thought that... that we could spend all of our time together--really together.” I leaned into his shoulder, hoping to keep him from leaving while we were talking.
“I cannot do this right now. Not yet.” He said, robotically, removing his arm from my shoulder. “I really wish that I could be what you want me to be, but I cannot be.” He made a move to stand up and get away from me, but I grabbed him by the arm and pulled him back. I was sick of him walking away from me and ignoring me. I spent all day in the same room as him, but I felt just as disconnected as when I thought he was faded. “Let go.” He commanded, but his voice was softer than it should have been. “Eat your food. You need to eat.” He yanked his arm away from me, and then started smoothing out his sleeve. He didn’t look back at me.
“Why won’t you talk to me!” I asked again, “You were so nice on the first day! What changed!” My head sank in between my knees as I tried to stop the tears that were starting to threaten me. I didn’t want to cry in front of him. He didn’t show me any emotion, and I didn’t want to show him any, either. “Come back here, Cosmic.” My eyes stayed focused on the back of his head. I reached over and picked up my sandwich, poised and ready to throw it at him just to get his attention.
“I do not want you to starve. That would be a shame.” He told me, it was the closest that he had come to showing any affection towards me in days. He was walking towards his post at the door, going as far away from me as he could get without letting me off his watch. He started to open the door to step outside, but I screamed at him and he slammed it shut. “Be quiet.” He commanded, and this time he really meant it. His eyes burned holes in me when he met my face with his glare; they were glowing like spotlights.
I dropped my grilled-cheese into my lap. “I have to talk to someone.” Solemnly, I reached down and grabbed the tops of my high tops. I moved my fingers back and forth across the threads that held the material together. I couldn’t help but think of Reno as I did it. Suddenly, I felt like I would have been more comfortable with Reno than with Cosmic. I felt like I knew Reno better than I knew Cosmic, even though I’d known Cosmic for years and Reno for only days; although, at this point, those years meant close to nothing. It had been so long, it was foolish for me to think that he would be the same. That he would feel the same way about me. “Can I at least see my parents?” I still held out hope that I could find some solace in them--even though I knew that they had been vampberries for much longer, their humanity was gone and I just didn’t want to admit it. I didn’t want to admit defeat. If I was going to be locked up in the basement of a vampberry coven, I wanted to believe that I was going to gain something from it.
“Okay.” He said, quietly, “You are right. I have forgotten how important socialization is to mortals.” The glowing in his eyes subsided, and I felt comfortable standing up and approaching him. His expression softened at my limp, but he did not offer me a hand. However, he did hold the door open for me and walk slowly with me down the hallway to the room that my parents were in. He whispered to me as I walked past him, through the door, “We can’t talk here.” But it was so quiet that part of me thought that I had imagined it, and I was too afraid that I’d made it up to ask him to repeat it. Once I was past in, and out in the hallway, he spoke again, but this time at normal volume. “I will have to stay and keep watch. I want you to be prepared for that.”
“I didn’t expect anything different.” I sighed. It would be easy enough to ignore him, since it was basically like he wasn’t there anyway.
He asked me to be quiet as we walked, and I nodded, then we headed out to find my parents again. I didn’t even try to memorize the route we took, since every hallway looked exactly the same. I peered down a few as we travelled, and I couldn’t tell one from the next. It didn’t matter, anyway, since I wasn’t allowed to leave my room by myself, I just hoped that I’d feel more comfortable if I knew my way around the place. That was not going to be a possibility, though, so I gave up on it pretty quickly.
Cosmic stopped in front of a door that looked just like the one which we had found my parents behind the first time--but I couldn’t say for certain that it was the same one, since they all looked the same. He knocked twice, and was met with what I perceived to be silence, but he found some kind of answer in. He signaled to me to be quiet, which was unnecessary because I wasn’t making any noise, and then he opened the door. He stepped in before me, and then signaled for me to join him.
“Mint is here to see you.” He announced, and I felt my cheeks becoming hot. He introduced me like he was a butler and I was some sort of special guest. I tried to walk towards my parents, but he held me away from them using his arm to bar the way.
“Do not worry, we will not harm her.” My father told Cosmic, causing him to relax a bit. Cosmic stepped backwards, leaning up against the wall behind him. Watching. “It is very good to see you.” My dad told me, “It has been too long, has it not?” The way he spoke made him seem so... unhuman. None of his words seemed to flow naturally, they seemed so forced and formal, and it was exactly what I didn’t need. My parents really weren’t my parents anymore, and it was just making it worse to see that. It was like salt in the wound that Cosmic had opened when he was distant. But it was too late to back out, now, I was going to talk to my parents. I was going to fish for the parts of them that remained after their transformation.
“Why don’t we sit down.” I suggested awkwardly. Sitting seemed like a good way to make the conversation more relaxed and casual. I walked carefully to the wall behind my parents, away from Cosmic, who wasn’t part of our conversation, and sat down. I was joined quickly by my parents, who sat on either side of me. Fir wandered over to Cosmic, still not exactly comfortable with me being around. As much as I wanted to, I didn’t blame him. Who knows what the vampberries had told him about mortals, since they had to convince him to let them turn him at some point.
The silence settled in the room at the same time we did. I felt like I could have cut through the tension with a knife, and with each passing second it choked me more and more, preventing me from speaking. I wanted to soak up the time that I had with them because I needed to make up for lost time, too, and sitting around silently wasn’t getting the job done. My hands reached for the floor where if I had been outside I would have started pulling up grass, but there was no grass to occupy my idle hands. Instead, I splayed my fingers out on the cold tile.
“How have you been?” My dad finally asked. It was a pretty stupid question, but at least he was trying. But I didn’t know how to answer. They’d been gone for 10 years; 10 years when I grew up, became an adult, went through elementary school, middle school, and high school. So much had happened that they’d missed, I didn’t know how to answer the question of how I’d been. I didn’t even know if they’d understand what I said. Did they remember what emotion was like, or were they just mindless worker bees contained in the hive? Ferric had seemed to have some emotion--even if it was just cruelty and malevolence--but maybe their mortal emotions had to be erased before new vampberry ones could show up. Besides, I couldn’t tell them that I’d been sad, even though that was about as accurate as I could get about the time that they’d been gone. If they did understand emotion, and I told them that I’d been sad, they’d feel awful. If there was one thing I was sure of regarding their disappearance it was this; they didn’t chose it.
“Um... okay...” I finally answered. Part of me hoped that my dad could see through that facade, and see that I hadn’t been okay; know that I couldn’t have possibly been okay. Part of me hoped that he’d just accept the answer and move on. “I mean... I missed you guys, but life went on.” I reached out, ready to take one of each of their hands, but I stopped myself. Was it okay to touch vampberries? Would they turn on me, try to attack me or drink my blood if I touched them? I took a deep breath, and went for it. Their hands tightened around mine.
“We cannot wait until you can join us.” My mom said, “Cosmic tells us that we have to wait three months until you can be turned. It will be worth it.” Her hand squeezed mine. It made me sad that she didn’t remember when my real birthday was, but I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to stick my foot in my mouth. “There are so many worries that you can let go of once you have been turned. You will be so much happier; so much freer.” She smiled, showing me her sharp teeth.
I looked up to see Fir’s small face approaching me. He was padding softly across the room, being extremely cautious, but coming up to me by his own accord. I looked up at Cosmic, expecting him to be smiling at me, happy that Fir was finally reaching out to me, but he had a stark grimace on his face. His arms were crossed, and he looked like a shadow had settled over his face. My eyes darted back to Fir before he could realize that I’d been looking. Fir was smiling at me, so I smiled back and encouraged him to come a little bit closer. He did, talking tiny step after tiny step until I could reach out and place my hand on his face. I didn’t do that, because I didn’t want to ***** him, but it was hard to resist.
“Hey, little guy.” I cooed. His grin widened at my voice, “You remember me, Fir? We met last week. I’m your sister, Mint.” He brought my hand up so that it was within his reach, and he met me halfway. His little hand settled into mine, and his whole face brightened at the warmth. It must have been such a novel thing to him to meet another berry with natural body heat. “Yeah, I’m like you.” I told him.
“Mint.” He said. “I like you, Mint.” It made me happy to hear my name being used in conversation. It made me feel a lot closer to him, whereas Cosmic and my parents usually never said my name--though Cosmic had a few times, it just wasn’t enough. I had never understood how important the use of a name was when talking to somebody, but it made all the difference in the world.
“Maybe, after your transformation, you can tell Fir that it is not so bad to be changed.” My mom suggested, “He still has 8 years until he can be changed, but he is scared. He insists that he will not do it.” She released my hand, and pushed gently on my back, encouraging me to get closer to Fir.
“Yeah, okay.” I agreed, standing up and taking a step towards my brother. He didn’t shy away, which I was sure he would do now that I was so much taller than him. “I’m sure Cosmic can tell you it’s not so bad, right Cosmic?” I looked up to him, to find that he still looked unhappy. He responded to my expectant look with a slight shake of his head. It couldn’t have been that bad, my parents seemed so for it, they couldn’t possibly want to put both of their children through some horrible process. My smile became more fake as I looked back at Fir, “I’ll be happy to tell how what it’s like once I go through it.” I shoved my hand into his hair, and ruffled it a little.
“I am not sure.” Fir whispered. It was strange to hear such formal words coming from such a small child. I wanted nothing more than just to comfort him, so I bent down a gave him a hug. I felt him relax in my arms, and I was pretty proud of myself. I’d never thought of myself as somebody who was good at talking to--or dealing with--children.
“In fact--” I said, straightening up from Fir, “--well, I mean, I don’t really know if this would work, so just hear me out.” I walked past Fir, closing the gap between Cosmic and I. His expression didn’t soften, not even a little bit, as I came towards him. It made me falter a little bit that he already seemed to unreceptive to what I was saying, and he didn’t even know what it was yet. “I mean, you might disagree, I don’t really know how this works, but I was thinking--”
“No.”
“Come on, hear me out, okay.” I pleaded, bring my hands together in front of my chest. I tried to look straight into Cosmic’s eyes, but he looked away. “Just let me say what I want to sa--”
“No. I know what you are going to ask, and it is not going to happen.” He insisted.
I was not going down without arguing my case a little, “You don’t even know what it is yet.”
“I have a pretty good idea.”
“Why can’t you turn me now?” I asked. Cosmic shook his head. “Come on. Three months won’t really make a difference. Just turn me now.” I lifted my arm towards him, veins up. I bit down on my lip and widened my eyes, a technique that usually seemed to work for the girls I’d gone to school with--for getting guys to do what they wanted, that is, not for getting a vampberry to turn them.
“I do not think you understand.” He told me, with a heavy air of scolding in his voice. “I cannot simply break the rules. I am not a rogue vampberry, there are rules in this coven and they will be followed.” His expression was hard and unwavering. I opened my mouth to protest again, but Cosmic stopped me, discretely reaching out and touching my hand with his. I froze. He leaned in, bringing his mouth very close to my ear. A small, cold breath was released as he spoke, so silently I wasn’t sure if I was imagining that he was talking to me. “Follow my lead.” Was what I heard, but it didn’t not prepare me for what happened next. Nothing could have prepared me.
He leaned away from me for just a second, then he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me close to him, bring his lips to mine.
I hope that Cosmic can rediscover his emotion and him and Mint can be together! But mostly because I don't want her to be with Reno. >.>
Haha, no. It's not Crimson. I couldn't resist making the Vampberry leader blood colored, though, just like Nighty did.
You'll have to wait and see what happens.
Cosmic just why do you make my emotions hurt ;__;. I hope he can get in touch with his inner human/feeling side soon because like. That ship. I cannot watch it sink before it sails. :C
Nah, I wouldn't take your character without asking. But, I mean, how could I not make the leader of the vampberries the same color as blood? It's just too fitting to resist. Thank ya.
You'll just have to see where it all goes. 8)
What is he doing to her? Kissing her? Biting her? WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN! :shock:
I missed your comment somehow. Sorry. :oops:
You'll just have to see what he's leading her to.
That was supposed to be a cliffhanger. :XD:
You can fangirl over whoever you like.
He's kissing her. She would feel a bite.
You're gonna have to wait and see what'll happen.
Follow his lead, Mint.... all the way to his sexy vampire bed. ;]
The Landon Legacy Wordpress // Forums|
Chasing Rainbows: Wordpress // Forums
XD ohmygod. Well, maybe that's where he's taking her.
Probably not. But maybe.
I wish you luck! xD
Oh, yeah, that reminds me. I also want to watch all of Supernatural, Firefly, Merlin, and Game of Thrones before summer is over. (in addition to the remaining 3 episodes of Sherlock and then... 70 or so of Doctor Who)
Thanks. XD
His mouth was cold and hard pressed against mine. His hands around my waist sent shivers down my spine. I wanted to pull away, but I also didn’t want to pull away. I wanted to get away from him, but I also wanted to stay there in his arms forever. The internal battle was raging so hard that I couldn’t respond when he finally released me from his grip; I simply stumbled backwards slightly, only to be caught by his hand and pulled in again. I felt the words that I wanted to say, the questions that I wanted to ask, struggling to make their way out of my mouth, but failing. I could hardly breathe, let alone speak, but I wanted to know what in the world had just happened to make Cosmic do that. He hadn’t shown any emotion, and then he kissed me out of the blue. I practically had whiplash.
He took me by the hand and pulled me out of the room, where my parents and little brother stood, watching in silent confusion. My feet didn’t want to listen to me, in the same way that my words didn’t want to listen, but I was forced to follow behind him, stumbling the whole way. His grip was tight; tight enough that there was no way that I could remove my hand from it, but also loose enough that he wasn’t hurting me at all. Still, I was a bit worried about where we were going.
We sped down a couple of hallways, which could have been the same ones we’d taken to get to my parents from my room or they could have been totally different. Then we rounded a corner and Cosmic stopped abruptly by a door. He mouthed an apology, and before I had time to ask what for he was kissing me again, this time while pressing me up against the wall behind me. I felt one of his hands behind my back, and I heard the other fumbling with the doorknob behind me.
“Start taking off my jacket.” He muttered, pulling his face away just enough so he wasn’t breathing into my mouth when he spoke. I reached for his jacket, and started pushing it down his arms. He stopped me when he got the door open. I heard it swing and hit the wall behind it, and then I was being pulled into the room.
As soon as the door closed behind us everything stopped. He pushed me away from him, and fixed his jacket, afraid to look me in the eyes. He made sure that it was locked and that nobody could see into the room. Meanwhile, I was completely lost. I sat down in a chair while my brain continued to race, looking for an explanation somewhere. If it weren’t for the fact that Cosmic had positioned himself purposefully across the room from me, I might have thought that he intended to go farther, which scared me. Instead, he was leaning up against the wall, with his fist and forehead pressed against the stone.
“What was that?” I asked with a raspy voice. I held my hands together over my heart, which was still beating wildly out of control. I was trying to stop it, remembering what Cosmic had told me about keeping it quiet, I didn’t want to attract unwanted vampberry attention because of the blood surging through me. It was hard to be calm, though, with all of the fear and the excitement swirling around in me.
“I had to do something. They were getting to you.” Cosmic stated firmly, “I shouldn’t have let you talk to your parents. I should have known that they’d want you.” He didn’t turn around, he didn’t let me see him as he talked.
“Of course they want me, I’m their kid.” I scoffed, unsure why he thought they wouldn’t want me. Had he thought that they’d be so distanced from me that they wouldn’t even care? But why would he bring me to them if he’d thought it was going to hurt like that?
“No. They want to turn you. They want you to stay here with them, Mint.” He clarified, but it didn’t do much in the way of making things clearer for me. “They want to make you like them, to steal your humanity away from you. Didn’t you hear what they were trying to say to you?” There was a slight glow reflecting off the wall in front of him; reflecting the light from his eyes. He was angry.
“I don’t understand, I thought you wanted to turn me.” Hadn’t he told Ferric that we just had to wait three months? He seemed like he had wanted it then.
“No, Mint, I care for you more than that. They’re just selfish. I would never condemn you to a life like this. You have so much to live for, so much more that you can do with your life. I wouldn’t be right to force you to stay here and be a monster.” Finally he turned around, and his eyes were bright like two little suns on his face. He was absolutely livid, but I didn’t know if it was with me or with my parents. Either way, I didn’t want to cross him more, but I wanted answers.
“So... you don’t want me here?” I asked.
“Mint, you misunderstand. I’d love more that anything to have you here with me forever. I’d love for us to be able to spend the rest of eternity together, but that would be selfish of me. You are so much better than this life. You’re not a killer. You’re not a monster.” He started to approach me, but he stopped, staying distanced from me. He was afraid that he was going to hurt me in his anger.
“You’re not a monster, either.” I whispered, but I knew that he wouldn’t accept it. I even knew that he really was a monster, but I didn’t want it to be true. It seemed like it would have been so easy to reach up to him, to get close to him, to kiss him again--which I longed to do--but that would have been so dangerous. That would have been asking to be sucked dry, and I wasn’t going to do that.
“Mint. No. I am a monster. Everyone here is a monster and a killer. We cannot be saved, but that’s okay because we don’t deserve to be saved, we all have blood on our hands, Mint, so much blood you cannot even begin to imagine. You, on the other hand, deserve a better life than this. I’m not going to turn you, Mint, I’m going to help you get out of here.” He backed away from me as the light in his eyes flared up.
I froze. “Can’t--can’t they hear you! They’re gonna fade you for saying that!” I kept my voice low, even though I knew that if they’d heard already then it was too late to be quiet; and I didn’t know how they could have possibly not heard. If a vampberry could hear my heartbeat from anywhere in the compound, then they could hear Cosmic yelling about helping me escape.
“It’s okay, Mint, they can’t hear us in this room, it’s for Ferric’s meetings that he doesn’t want overheard. That’s why I brought you here. We can talk freely in here, as long as they don’t think we’re talking.” He looked away from me, and I was sure--if he meant what I think he meant--that his face would have flushed if it could.
“Oh...” I breathed, “Well... what if I don’t want to go? What if I want to stay here with you, my parents, and Fir? You don’t get to decide what I do with my life.”
“No, you’re right, I don’t. But I can tell you what this is like, and explain to you why you don’t want this. I remember what it’s like to be human, Mint, I remember what it’s like to feel warm wrapped up in a blanket, to eat your favorite food, to love. I remember what it was like when I could hug Fir without him shivering at my touch--and I feel it with you, too. I know that I feel cold and dead to you, Mint, and I hate it. I want to be able to wrap you up and hold you in my warmth, but I have none.” His gaze was fixed on his wrist, where his fingers played with the hem of his sleeve, pulling the button in and out of it’s hole, rubbing the material between his thumb and forefinger.
Thinking about the coldness of the contact of his skin made me shiver. He saw it, and I saw pain and frustration flicker across his eyes. I could tell him that I didn’t mind the cold, but we both would have known that was a lie. Living beings desire warmth and comfort in a touch, and Cosmic couldn’t give that to me. “But... but... I’m sure you can still love, Cosmic.” I said it because I thought it was true. He seemed to love Fir a lot, and he seemed to at least care for me. Maybe it wasn’t clear to him how much that came across to other people.
“The love I show is all because of memory. Every bit of affection is forced, because I remember what it felt like, and because I want to feel it again, but it’s not the same. This is not the feeling that I once had, and with each day it fades from me more. Every second that I’m a vampberry I feel a shred of my humanity slipping away, and it’ll keep going until I’m nothing but a monster. Eventually I’ll be heartless and cruel like Ferric. I’ll have no remorse for the lives I take in order to eat. Everyday I’m dying more, it’s only a matter of time before the poison takes over everything--you can see it in your parents; they struggle to find the humanity buried deep inside them. It’s been covered by layers of stone in their hearts, cooled to the point where it’s nearly unrecognizable to them.” The glowing in his eyes subsided to darkness and pain. It was like a shadow that passed over his face, but it lingered. I no longer felt the same fear to touch him, but something still held me back.
“I don’t want to leave you guys. I spent my whole life wishing that I could be with the people that I love again, and now I’m here and you’re telling me I have to go away.” The words were crackly and quiet, soft enough that I had a hope that they’d gone unnoticed.
“Mint--” Cosmic spoke, “--I know this isn’t ideal. Trust me when I say that I want you here, but if you really knew what it was like you’d be charging at the opportunity to leave. Knowing what I do now, I’d rather be out there, even if it meant a 9-to-5 office job in cubeville and a boring life in suburbia.” His anger had all but melted away, and he was beginning to make an emotional plea to me.
“But--”
“No ‘buts’ Mint. I will not turn you. I will not be the one to steal your life away from you. I won’t let your parents do it, either, if I can help it. You and Fir need to get out of here.” Stepping towards me he placed both of his hands on my shoulder and looked right into my eyes, “I have this all planned out, Mint, you just need to follow my lead. Why do you think I told them that you turned 18 in three months? I know that’s not true, Mint, I know exactly when your birthday is--I never forgot it--but in two or three months they’ll stop watching you, and then I can help you slip out.” He smiled, waiting for me to respond. It was a lopsided smile, friendly, patient, anxious. It was the vision that I’d always had of him whenever I imagined him as an adult with me.
He remembered my birthday. That shouldn’t have mattered to me as much as it did, but it just proved that it wasn’t stupid for me to have cared about him all those years. I didn’t forget him, and he didn’t forget me, either. We didn’t know that we’d be reunited, but we held on to each other so tight, it had to be destiny.
I stood up, causing his hands to fall from my shoulders, and leaned into him.
Pulling his head in with both of my hands, I kissed him, ignoring the cold that radiated through my body. It wasn’t exactly what I thought it was going to be, kissing Cosmic, because I’d never once imagined that he’d be a vampberry, undead and freezing, but that’s who he was now and it didn’t matter to me. He was still Cosmic, and I still loved him.
And I let him know that. He needed to know.
“I love you, too, Mint. That’s why I have to let you go.”
*~~~~*~~~~*
I didn’t want to leave Cosmic and my family, but I did understand that he was very serious about what he was doing. Under no circumstances was he going to let me stay there with the coven, and the more I thought about it, the more I realized that he did have a point. He did know better than I did about being a vampberry. He knew what it was like to be stuck there in the camp. It was also true that I did not have the heart to kill, which would make it extremely difficult for me to live as a vampberry, because starvation, while it wouldn’t kill a vampberry, would be extremely miserable for one.
But that didn’t mean that I was happy about leaving.
Then Cosmic presented me with an idea. It was a genius idea, that I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t thought of before he suggested it; I could bring Fir with me. I could save him, spare him the same fate that Cosmic was sparing me. That really pushed me over the edge and, reluctantly, I agreed to Cosmic’s plan. I agreed to leave the compound, my parents, and my best friend.
My job over the next few weeks was to get close to Fir, to make him trust me. I needed him to trust me enough to run with me, away from his parents and the only life he’d ever known. The problem was that he had to trust me, but he couldn’t know what we were doing, because Cosmic and I were both sure that if he knew that I was taking him away, he’d never go. I felt awful about tricking him like that, but I wanted to save him, and that desire to better his life trumped the guilt of pulling him away from his family. I had to convince him that I was somebody he could trust his life with, but for that to happen I had to believe that I was somebody he could trust his life with, and it was hard for me to believe that. I’d never been responsible for another person in all of my 18 years of life. I’d never been responsible for a cat or a dog, or even a fish, I had absolutely no experience with keeping anybody else alive. That made my confidence shaky, but I had to hide it for Fir’s sake. For him, I had to push all of my doubts and insecurities aside; his life depended on it. I pretty quickly figured out that if I wanted to hold myself accountable for getting out of there, I had to do it for Fir, because I still didn’t really want to leave. No matter what Cosmic said, how hard he argued that I couldn’t live there, or how many good reasons he had that I had to leave, part of me wanted to stay there with him. I didn’t want to give up the people who I’d spend the latter half of my life wishing to be reunited with.
So I latched on to Fir. I knew that it wouldn't be easy to get him to trust me as much as I needed him to, and I couldn’t blame him for that. He’d known me for so little time, and I was so different than what he was used to, that he was unsure about me. There was one good sign, something that was promising to me, and that was that Fir was curious about me. At first I couldn’t tell if it was a good or bad kind of curiosity, but I soon realized that he wanted to get to know me. He wanted to get to know me because I was his sister, and he had spent his whole life not knowing that I existed, and not knowing what it meant to have a sister, but he had one now, and he wanted to explore the idea.
“Where did you grow up?” Fir asked me. I was happy that he was finally comfortable enough with me to start questioning my life, since I’d spent a lot of time getting to know him.
I knew that I had to be careful with my answers. I couldn’t say anything without being overheard by everyone, and one false step, one leak of too much of the wrong kind of information, could lead to my immediate fading. I was walking a fine line, having to tell Fir enough but also keep enough a secret, but Cosmic had gone over this with me. He and I had made up a few details to fill in the things that I had to leave blank for my safety. “I grew up in a town not far from here.” I told Fir, “I lived with a bunch of mortals. In fact, I didn’t even know vampberries existed until I came here.”
“If you’re my sister...” He started, and then stopped to think about his question. “... then... my parents are you parents...? Didn’t know know they were vampberries?” This was not a question that I had prepared for. I stumbled over my words for a minute before I could come up with something that I thought would be an acceptable answer--both for Fir and for the vampberries around me.
“They... uh... they hadn’t been turned yet before they... uh... came here.” I stammered, hoping desperately they he would ask me why they came without me. Unfortunately, he did ask. “They... uh... well, they didn’t know that they were going to come here... it was really short notice, y’know, and I... umm... I was staying with my mom’s friend when they left. That’s why... I... didn’t... come...”
“I heard them talking, once.” Fir told me, quietly. He motioned for me to lean in, so that he could whisper it to me. I knew it wouldn’t make a difference, but I didn’t know how to explain that to him--or even if that would be a good idea. I leaned in, pressing my hand against the cold, dirty floor to hold myself up. “I heard--” He whispered, “They said ‘he knows too much.’ It was when they faded Cosmic’s dad. I was scared that they would fade m- our dad, too.” He leaned away from me, his eyes wide and his expression clearing conveying the fear that he felt and the fear that he still had of the vampberries.
“Well,” I started, in an attempt to downplay what he’d just said to those who were eavesdropping on us, “Our dad is a smart guy. Did you know that he used to be a scientist before he came here?” Fir nodded, but my attempts at comforting him failed. He still looked just as scared. Suddenly I felt like my heart had stopped as the rest of Fir’s sentence sunk into my brain. It was when they faded Cosmic’s dad. Cosmic’s dad was faded. Aside from the obvious, that meant that Fir knew what vampberries did. He knew that they took lives, and it scared me that he was able to speak about it--even if it wasn’t too easily that he spoke about it, it was still frightening that he could tell me at all. I swallowed, trying to relax my face so that I could look brave for Fir.
“A scientist?” Fir asked, quietly, “What kind of stuff did he do?”
“He studied our family history.” I told him, “He researched our grandparents, great-grandparents, great-great-grandparents, and even further back, too. He learned about where they came from, where they lived, who they married. I don’t know much about his work, but he seemed to think it was really interesting. He did other stuff, too, but that’s the one I remember. The genealogy.”
“Grandparents?” Fir asked. For a moment I thought that maybe he didn’t know what grandparents were, since he’d been cooped up all his life. In fact, I thought there might have been a lot of things that he didn’t know. He’d never gotten a chance to go to school or talk to people his own age, I assumed that not a lot was explained to him. Besides, they had to keep him in the dark about the outside world if they wanted him to accept his future trapped in the vampberry settlement. “I know my... my... great-grandparents--our great-grandparents.” He smiled at me, looking very proud of himself for the little tidbit of information.
He knew our great-grandparents? That had to mean that they were vampberries, and that they lived here; in the same coven as my parents. I felt a little sad that I hadn’t been introduced to them, not that I expected them to know who I was, but the fact that they were family made me wish that they’d reached out to me. Although, if there was one thing that Cosmic had made abundantly clear to me it was that the longer you were a vampberry, the more monstrous you were, so maybe they just couldn’t care anymore, and I guess I couldn’t really blame them for that. It wasn’t their fault that they’d been turned, and it wasn’t their fault that it had been so long.
“Does our dad know our great-grandparents?” I asked, thinking that maybe he would have been happy to get to know some of the people who he’d been studying.
Fir nodded solemnly, his lips tightening into somewhat of a frown. “Only great-gramma is here.” He told me, “I forget Ferric is not grampa. Daddy dislikes her. When I was little he said she is the reason that we live here.” His head dropped, so that his eyes were on the ground, and somewhere that I couldn’t see them. “He said it was good, but I remember him being sad when he told me that.”
“Oh. I’m sure he meant what he said.” I wasn’t sure. If Fir had been young when our dad told him that, maybe our dad had still been able to show emotion. Maybe he was trying to fool Fir for safety reasons, just like I was doing.
“Probably.” Fir sighed, “I wanna stop talking. Can we play a game, now?” He waited for me to nod, which I did, and then he stood up. I wondered where he was going to find a game to play in a dark, dank dungeon like the one we were trapped in, but he knew where to go. There was a small, dark, wood chest on the other side of the room. He walked over to it and flipped the lid up, leaning inside and coming back out holding a little space ship. It was red and white, oval shaped, with wings jutting out of the bottom. “This one is my favorite.” He told me, “Ferric bought it for me.” He ran his fingers along the edges of the wings. Thinking about Ferric seemed to be a good thing for Fir, a small smiled appeared on his face when he brought him up. Meanwhile, I tried to hide my disgust at the mention of Ferric’s name, remembering how he treated me when Cosmic brought me to meet him.
He walked up to me and sat down, holding the little rocket in both hands. He sat staring at it for a moment, as if considering his options, and then he held it out to me. I shook my head, “Don’t you want to play with it?” I asked.
“We can take turns.” He told me, pushing it towards me again. Reluctantly, I grabbed it from him, not really sure what to do with it. I didn’t want to let him down, and be boring, and I wanted to be somebody who he could be close to, somebody he could relate with. I closed my eyes, thinking of the days spent playing with Cosmic in my backyard. The good old days, when the biggest worry I had was losing an action figure in the sandbox.
Even pulling forward on the memories of being a kid wasn’t enough. I couldn’t think of a single thing to do with the little rocket, so I passed it back to Fir. He didn’t want to take it back at first, but eventually he relented. “It’s your toy.” I told him, which was what caused him to finally take it from me.
He started to play with it, and he reminded me of Cosmic when we were little. I soaked up his innocence and happiness, and then closed my eyes, remembering the time that Cosmic and I were just like that. If I concentrated hard enough I could picture my backyard. The trees rustling in the slight wind, the swings drifting freely, Cosmic and I kneeling on the dirt, digging up worms. Once he told me that you could split a worm in half and that it would stay alive, but he wouldn’t do it. He didn’t want to risk killing the worm. But now--now he killed berries. He had to, because of what he was, but it was so different from what he used to be. Suddenly, my memory changed, it became dark, cold, it sent a chill down my spine. The Cosmic in my imagination cut the worm in half, then turned to me with glowing eyes and chalky skin.
I opened my eyes, covering my mouth to keep from screaming. My eyes focused back on Fir, trying to bring my concentration back to the present, back to my little brother who stood in front of me and had kept his humanity despite growing up in a coven of vampberries. It was not a feat that I felt I could have accomplished, but Fir clearly clung tightly to life. He had never known anything else, he didn’t have something better to compare it to, but I wanted to give him something better.
A voice pulled me away from Fir, “Are you alright?” I turned to look, though I recognized who it was just by the sound; it was Cosmic, who was standing just inside the doorway, with the door closing behind him. “I heard your heart speed up.” He admitted, hanging his head a little, like he was ashamed to be concerned over something so small. I felt kind of stupid, because he had heard my heartrate speed up from another room, and I didn’t even hear him enter the room until he spoke.
“I’m fine.” I told him, “Fir and I were just playing with his rocket ship toy. Nothing to be concerned about.” I smiled at him, and he started to turn away to leave the room. I didn’t want him to leave, “Wait!” I called, stopping him in his tracks. “Maybe... maybe you could stay and play with us.” I knew there was a chance that he’d say no, that he’d tell me that vampberries were supposed to play with toys, that he couldn’t be too close to me, but he didn’t give me an excuse. He smiled, and walked towards us, Fir and I, his steps smooth and quick. He knelt down beside us, making sure to be close to me, but without our skin touching. He had explained to me that we could show sexual attraction, but it was too dangerous to show simple affection, because that would alert the others to his lingering humanity. We would all be safer if they believed that his emotions had already mostly faded away.
“Okay. For a minute.” He said, settling into position on the floor next to me.
Watching Fir in front of us, playing with his toy, I couldn’t help but imagine that this was, in a way, how our life was supposed to turn out. Only, Fir would have a little bit of pink, too, and we’d be older by the time he was 10. But part of me imagined Cosmic and myself as Fir’s parents, and I couldn’t hold back a smile. Even if it was only in my imagination, it felt right to sit there next to Cosmic watching Fir. I had to be careful, though, not to get too attached to the idea. If Cosmic wanted me out of the coven, it was likely that one of two things would happen. 1. I’d never see him again. Although that was my least favorite option, it was the one that seemed most likely. That was why I pushed it aside and came up with another option. 2. Cosmic would send me away, and then escape to be with me. That one was more dangerous, and would probably involve a lot of running and hiding. Who knew it our lives could ever be normal if we had to run away, and that wouldn’t be a life I’d be inclined to bring a child into, which was a an idea that disheartened me a little.
The thing was, though, that I would be okay with a life of running and hiding, if it meant that I could be with Cosmic once and for all. All I really needed was him. If I could be happy as a human prisoner in a vampberry coven just because of him, surely I’d be able to be happy on the run with him. The problem was that I didn’t know if he felt the same way.
My focus was pulled away from Fir for a minute by Cosmic’s gentle, cold touch on my arm. It was just a small nudge of his elbow against mine, but it immediately called my attention to him. My eyes left Fir, and his rocket, and shifted to Cosmic, whose gaze changed, and hardened, once my view reached him.
“Would you like to come with me to another room?” He asked, cryptically. “You can see your brother again another time.”
“What do yo--Oh. Oh. Um... yeah... yeah, sure.” I stuttered, hoping that he was asking me to go with him to discuss our plan. I had my fingers mentally crossed that he would tell me just how he planned to come along, but I knew that was a long shot. It wasn’t a good idea for me to get my hopes up, but it was already too late. I wanted him to come with us, and there was no way of making my heart let go of that idea. Standing up, I turned to Fir, who had set his rocket down on the ground and was looking at me md Cosmic with slight confusion. “I’ll be back, okay?” I said, smiling at him. He nodded, and turned his attention back to his toy. He seemed a little less enthusiastic to play with it because Cosmic and I were leaving, and I felt bad; like I was abandoning him somehow. If only he could know that it was exactly the opposite; I was saving him.
By the time I turned away from Fir, Cosmic was already standing up and waiting for me at the door. As I approached him, he pushed the big, wooden door open, holding it for me, and then following me out. The click of the locked sounded, and the hallways was cut-off from the light of the room that Fir lived in. I waited in the hall for him to walk past me--briskly and without emotion, not so much as sparing me a glance--and then I followed him. I had learned that it was best to just let him lead me, because I was not going to understand the way the tunnels were laid out, especially not between now and when he would make me leave.
He opened the door for me again when we reached the room where we usually met. I smiled at him when he did it, but I wasn’t offended when he didn’t respond. He couldn’t. Although, it surprised me that he could--as a vampberry--be more considerate than a lot of guys.
I walked in and sat down, relaxing and sinking down into the chair as much as possible. I looked up at Cosmic, expecting his usual loosening and displaying of emotion, but I found none. His face was a blank slate, and his hands were fists at his sides. He looked just as distant as when we were out where we could be seen. That was enough to freak me out a little. The first thought I had was ‘Did something go wrong?’ I sat up, about to ask him what had happened, but he spoke before me.
Two simple words were all he said, “It’s time.”