My sim's friends keep declining invites!

MKSizzle · August 2018

I am not sure what is happening here. I have had 2 of my sims try to invite their best friends over but they keep getting declined. The sims are not at work, they just say the don't feel like it. Has anyone ever had this happen or any idea what is going on?

puzzlezaddict · August 2018

I've seen it quite a bit. Sometimes it's about traits (like if the other sim is a loner), sometimes the relationship isn't high enough. But the other big contributor is that the invitee is stuck. If you find the sim and open their house, you'll often see them halfway through the door or caught in another awkward position.

Of course, a MC reset will take care of the problem. But if you find a particularly stubborn sim, you can always use MC to make them show up. Click on the sim, or City Hall if you don't feel like tracking them down, NRaas > MC > (sim) > Basic > Invite Over. If they really didn't want to show up, though, or you asked a few times in a row, they might think your sim is being awkward or creepy. But a simple apology will fix the issue.

MKSizzle · August 2018

@puzzlezaddict unfortunately, i dont think any of these are the issue. That is why i specified BEST friend lol so yeah oh their relationship is mote than ok. Definitely not a loner, more party animal

puzzlezaddict · August 2018

I saw what you wrote, but you asked if anyone had seen the issue of a sim constantly declining invites. Yes, I have, for several reasons, and I focused on the one that seemed most likely in your case. Regardless of whatever else is going on, you can always use MC to force a visit.

The other thing I should have said is that even after a reset, the sim might still refuse a phone invite if you've already tried at least once that day. The game apparently still remembers that the other sim said no thanks sometime in the last 24 hours, and a second invitation doesn't work. But that's what mods are for.

mw1525 · August 2018

@MKSizzle - The thing about the relationship panel is it really doesn't tell the truth of a Sim's true relationship. At best, the relationship panel will indicate the type of interactions that a Sim can have with another. For example, you can't reveal a secret to an acquaintance and you can't tell an inside joke to someone who isn't a good friend (I believe).

True Sim friendships are a bit tricky to obtain. They will depend not just on traits but the amount of time you spend with your friend and the type of things/activities/events you share with your friends. Some Simmers have suggested that it really doesn't matter what you do with your 'friends', just that you do something with them. Can't say I fully agree with this as I have found it better to invite a Sim who likes fishing to go out fishing with my Sim and one who is athletic to the gym to build the best friendships. It also doesn't hurt to have your Sim pick up the phone and call his/her friend every-so-often just to keep the relationship up.

MKSizzle · August 2018

@mw1525 Well, alright so I have definitely ruled out it being anything to do with that. As I had mentioned, they are truly besties and party together a few times a week. This is just not typical at all. And besides that, I also had another sim try to invite a friend over and I got the same type of decline. Again, not typical.

mw1525 · August 2018

Well, something is negatively affecting the best friends. It isn't uncommon for visit requests to be refused and sometimes they are refused because the Sim is about to be otherwise engaged, lacks the interest or needs to take care of some other need and really can't make it. Usually, when this happens they'll call back and say something came up. If all they are saying is they don't feel like it, then there is most likely an issue there which you may or may not be aware of.

igazor · August 2018

Has your sim tried cleaning the house and bathing once in a while? Sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures.

I prefer the MC > Basic > Invite Over method though. It's a bit cheaty, but if I know the sims I am inviting are best friends, beloved relatives, etc. and aren't really busy at the time, it cuts through the random element (or the one we can't at the time figure out) getting in the way. I'll still use the phone or in person invite interaction if there's any doubt that the other sim might accept, two friends just getting to know each other for example. In those cases, an occasional "Nah, I have to wash my hair and clean the birdcage tonight" seem a bit more realistic.

mw1525 · August 2018

Here's where play styles differ. @igazor, is it for special occasions you may use the NRaas option, like a family members wedding where you really want that Sim to be a part of it? Or, is it more of a 'you'll come when I call you thing'? Please forgive my question as I can't imagine any circumstance where I would ever want to 'force' a Sim over for a visit. Again, that's just my play style talking.

igazor · August 2018

It is indeed a play style thing. When I invite a friend or two over to play video games for a casual afternoon, I don't necessarily expect them to accept. When I invite my parents over for dinner and to play with their grandkids, I am devising a storyline and when I can see they aren't really doing anything important by way of NRaas Tagger, then they will come when I summon them. It's a case by case basis, with many falling in between the two extremes.

If the grandparents, in that example, would really rather be someplace else that evening, then they are free to leave after they arrive and have been greeted. I might be disappointed, but won't try to force them to stay.

mw1525 · August 2018

@igazor - Thanks. I was just curious. Even if it were the latter, it wouldn't make a difference as everything we do all boils down to play style.

MKSizzle · August 2018

@igazor Nail on the head right there. Maybe she just needed to take a shower. She is a slob after all. Maybe her friend was sick of watching her lick plates. She should have responded "I'll come over when you learn some manners and don't smell".

bekkasan · August 2018

Sims are just downright ornery sometimes and it is hard to figure out why. If I need the sim for my story I use the invite over option that way I know they will come. I usually will check to be sure they are not working or doing something important like woohooing that I could potentially be interrupting. That would be mean.

ScottDemon · August 2018

If their motives are low or they have another higher priority such as getting ready to go to work or their just in a bad mood they will always decline an invite.

MKSizzle · August 2018

@ScottDemon yeah, I did consider that, but I had 2 other sims try inviting their best friends and those were also declined. Then I attempted the same a day later and got the same result. There is definitely something funky going on.

igazor · August 2018

MKSizzle wrote: »

@ScottDemon yeah, I did consider that, but I had 2 other sims try inviting their best friends and those were also declined. Then I attempted the same a day later and got the same result. There is definitely something funky going on.

There is another way without resorting to the MC forced invites. Go to where one of these sims are and chat them up socially. Eventually, somewhere in between Sim A thinks Sim B is being sociable/friendly, the option to form a group or invite over should come up. Try one of those. If there is another sim you also wish to invite, bring the "group" (of two) to where they are and ask them to join the group, then bring the group home with you. Or if it's just the one, skip the group and invite them over in person.

What often strikes me as funny is that "Ask to Move In" will frequently show up as a social interaction before or at the same time as "Invite Over." Sheesh, I just wanted to play video games with my friends and order a pizza or something like that, I wasn't looking for a reason to expand my one bedroom apartment and make a lifelong commitment!

If they still refuse, then you might be able to use MC to find out why -- check their motive scores (MC > Basic > Mood) and moodlets (MC > Intermediate > Moodlets > Remove Moodlet, but just to see the list not to really remove anything), and their Career status to make sure they aren't planning to get ready for work soon. Even that can be difficult to see, I've had inactive sims claim to need to be getting ready for work "soon" when it's 12 noon and they didn't start work until 5pm or later.

And if it's not any of those things and they are still refusing to come over, then I would have to say these sims don't really like yours as much as you think they do.

ScottDemon · August 2018

MKSizzle wrote: »

@ScottDemon yeah, I did consider that, but I had 2 other sims try inviting their best friends and those were also declined. Then I attempted the same a day later and got the same result. There is definitely something funky going on.

Actually it's not really unusual the game doesn't always do a good job keeping inactive sims motives at a decent level it always leaves a couple of them very low. Have you tried using MC's Max Motives on them?
Find the sim if their on a community lot like the park pause the game then click on the sim MC>Intermediate>Max Motives unpause the game keep that sim in view wait about 4 or 5 seconds and then use your sims map tag (which you should be able to see somewhere on the screen) to Invite them over.
If their in a house first open the house click on the house or it's map tag MC>Open then find the sim once found pause the game and use Max Motives on them and follow the rest of the steps. And make sure to close the house back up after your done MC>Close
If they refuse the invite after that then maybe something funky is going on. But if they accept the invite that means the game isn't managing all their motives well.
Just make sure to pick a time they don't have to be anywhere say right after they get off from work.

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My sim's friends keep declining invites!

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