I want to say that I'm sorry for falling off the face of the earth and falling behind on reading. My life is in shambles right now. Details are kind of intense, so feel free to skip it. I will be more active after August when I'm settled in my new place.
Umm, I struggle from a mental illness called Borderline Personality Disorder (Also, PTSD, ADD and Depression. Those often go together as symptoms of BPD.) and I am having a very hard time getting it treated. My roommate is very judgmental of my mental illness and is very mean to me to the point of driving me to suicidal tendencies. She has hurt me A LOT, we used to be friends, but she judged me because I couldn't hold a job with my illness and was going to therapy when my bf and I could afford it. My bf was supporting me through my hard times and she judged me for it saying that I was using him for his money and I am just a crazy B, she calls me a loser whenever she sees me and tells me I'm pathetic and I need to do something with my life.
I was admitted to the ER a few months back for reckless driving on the freeway and disassociation, my living situation was pushing me past the point that I could handle. My boyfriend encouraged me and told me I could work for just him and I and our future, to not think of our roommate, just to focus on us and it's really hard. I got a new job and have been working A LOT to make money so that my boyfriend and I can move. It is VERY stressful on me and I don't handle jobs or authority figures very well. I feel like a Jenga puzzle that's been all over the ground forever and now I've finally got the pieces piled back up, but pull one wrong piece and I'm crashing all over the floor again. I don't know how long I can hold this job for, but I have to do it for my boyfriend, for myself. It's seriously hard physical labor and stressful, but I have to find a way to get through it until I can make a living from home writing. I don't see myself doing anything else in the long run, with my mental illness I NEED a job that I can work from home for the long run.
It's gotten so bad that I have been living in my bedroom for 4 months, I haven't left my room to go into my own house in 4 months. I haven't cooked a meal in 4 months or sat in my own living room. There is a mini-fridge and microwave in my room that I use to live with in my bedroom. I have my emotional support animals in my room with me, so it's very crowded. I'm seriously struggling atm.
I'm trying to move in 2 weeks, my life will be all kinds of chaos until August. I will be moved into a nice, new apartment and get a fresh start. I'm already looking for a new psychiatrist and therapist so I can get back on medicine and in therapy sessions to help me with my illness. I failed all my classes last semester too. This is all embarrassing, but somehow I'm gonna figure my way through all this.
I don't know how active I can be in here until after August, I haven't even had time to update my stories Djinni's Lamp or LLS. Those stories make me happy and I've had NO time for them and I'm super bummed because it's pride month and that's PERFECT for LLS. Plus that new awesome patch came out, it was a perfect month for Rei, but I was too sick to tell their story this pride month.
I hope that when I'm settled in my new home in August, I find the perfect therapist, get back on my meds so I can feel human again and fix my life so I can work towards my goal of being a career author and actress. I'm sorry to dump this all here, I just wanted you all to know that I haven't forgotten about you or these wonderful stories. I hope to be a lot more active after I'm settled in my new home.
Thank you so much. I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have dumped all that on here. I just am feeling overwhelmed and upset with my current situation. Thanks for the links, I'll keep them close.
I feel dumb because I re-read that now and think I could have just as easily said "I'm having a difficult time right now." and it would have been sufficient. I'm sorry everyone. That's some heavy junk for a game website, feel free to skip it. I'm working towards something better soon.
@DarciTheFox I feel you. My sister has BPD and she's also having a very tough time. I've also experienced times where I didn't leave my bedroom for weeks at a time due to depression. Life with a mental illness is tough, and no-one knows that better than my family.
Take some time off, don't stress. Things will get better, they always do.
I know I haven't exactly been active here either, but I've been reading your stories as much as possible! I'll try to leave a comment every once in a while
@DarciTheFox I feel you. My sister has BPD and she's also having a very tough time. I've also experienced times where I didn't leave my bedroom for weeks at a time due to depression. Life with a mental illness is tough, and no-one knows that better than my family.
Take some time off, don't stress. Things will get better, they always do.
I know I haven't exactly been active here either, but I've been reading your stories as much as possible! I'll try to leave a comment every once in a while
Oh thank you so much. You guys are so nice I'm over here crying like a little kid. BPD is the roughest thing I've ever encountered personally, for me and a lot of the women in my family. I hope your sister feels better soon and things get better for her, it's so hard. Depression will get you where it counts too, I'm glad there's others that know it's a struggle and encourage you to look past it. That's always so hard to do, especially when you're in the thick of it.
Thank you so much for reading my stories, it means so much to me. My boyfriend wants me to keep writing these stories so that I can get constructive criticism, improve my writing and prove to myself that I can write something good, mainly just to prove to myself that I can write something that is good. I don't have much faith in my writing skills, but it feels good to have my character's and my stories told. I'm trying to finish my first book this year and get it published because my boyfriend made a connection with Random House/Penguin Publishing and if I had a finished book, I might get to become a published author. I don't feel good enough for any of it, but I love my characters and the stories in my head so much that I think they deserve a chance to exist in the world.
Thank you, thank you.
I have been looking at fancy new apartments to make myself feel better. Since I'm making some money now and my boyfriend makes good money, we can afford to live in a nice loft in the city. I figure if I'm gonna have to be stressed out making money, I might as well love the place I come home to. I'm hoping that a nice environment will be good for my writing and I can finish my book quickly.
I hope something like this:
My boyfriend really likes the polished industrial loft look and all the large, open windows. I'm just excited to move somewhere nice. I'm kind of a killjoy though because I'd rather be on the ground floor and he'd rather have a view.
@DarciTheFox I feel you. My sister has BPD and she's also having a very tough time. I've also experienced times where I didn't leave my bedroom for weeks at a time due to depression. Life with a mental illness is tough, and no-one knows that better than my family.
Take some time off, don't stress. Things will get better, they always do.
I know I haven't exactly been active here either, but I've been reading your stories as much as possible! I'll try to leave a comment every once in a while
Oh thank you so much. You guys are so nice I'm over here crying like a little kid. BPD is the roughest thing I've ever encountered personally, for me and a lot of the women in my family. Depression will get you where it counts too, I'm glad there's others that know it's a struggle and encourage you to look past it. That's always so hard to do, especially when you're in the thick of it.
Thank you so much for reading my stories, it means so much to me. My boyfriend wants me to keep writing these stories so that I can get constructive criticism, improve my writing and prove to myself that I can write something good, mainly just to prove to myself that I can write something that is good. I don't have much faith in my writing skills, but it feels good to have my character's and my stories told. I'm trying to finish my first book this year and get it published because my boyfriend made a connection with Random House/Penguin Publishing and if I had a finished book, I might get to become a published author. I don't feel good enough for any of it, but I love my characters and the stories in my head so much that I think they deserve a chance to exist in the world.
Thank you, thank you.
I have been looking at fancy new apartments to make myself feel better. Since I'm making some money now and my boyfriend makes good money, we can afford to live in a nice loft in the city. I figure if I'm gonna have to be stressed out making money, I might as well love the place I come home to. I'm hoping that a nice environment will be good for my writing and I can finish my book quickly.
I hope something like this:
My boyfriend really likes the polished industrial loft look and all the large, open windows. I'm just excited to move somewhere nice. I'm kind of a killjoy though because I'd rather be on the ground floor and he'd rather have a view.
my mom would love if i felt like making money when stressed. i do the easy thing and fix it with ice cream and cookies.
my mom would love if i felt like making money when stressed. i do the easy thing and fix it with ice cream and cookies.
LOL, I never feel like making money when I'm stressed. I just have to, I do however love your idea of a solution and am considering a trip to the store for some cookies, like a box. lol. I think I'm gonna go de-stress and watch some Star Trek. (With some cookies. )
my mom would love if i felt like making money when stressed. i do the easy thing and fix it with ice cream and cookies.
LOL, I never feel like making money when I'm stressed. I just have to, I do however love your idea of a solution and am considering a trip to the store for some cookies, like a box. lol. I think I'm gonna go de-stress and watch some Star Trek. (With some cookies. )
my mom would love if i felt like making money when stressed. i do the easy thing and fix it with ice cream and cookies.
LOL, I never feel like making money when I'm stressed. I just have to, I do however love your idea of a solution and am considering a trip to the store for some cookies, like a box. lol. I think I'm gonna go de-stress and watch some Star Trek. (With some cookies. )
opps i wasn't suggesting you try that.
Too late!
I won't make it a habit though. I've already got my trampoline on the way and as soon as I move, I've got plans to start learning how to cook really well. But for tonight COOKIES!
my mom would love if i felt like making money when stressed. i do the easy thing and fix it with ice cream and cookies.
LOL, I never feel like making money when I'm stressed. I just have to, I do however love your idea of a solution and am considering a trip to the store for some cookies, like a box. lol. I think I'm gonna go de-stress and watch some Star Trek. (With some cookies. )
opps i wasn't suggesting you try that.
Too late!
I won't make it a habit though. I've already got my trampoline on the way and as soon as I move, I've got plans to start learning how to cook really well. But for tonight COOKIES!
iwas learning to cook . mom was teaching me. then temps reached 103.
That was such an interesting chapter, @MadameLee . I found it intriguing to think of the ways that what she wrote for her school project reflected and complimented her experiences. Really effective way to write this chapter!
That was such an interesting chapter, @MadameLee . I found it intriguing to think of the ways that what she wrote for her school project reflected and complimented her experiences. Really effective way to write this chapter!
Oh. By compliment here I mean companion... like you have a violin and cello playing together. They compliment each other. Each enhances the other's significance and effect. That's how these two parts work together .
Oh. By compliment here I mean companion... like you have a violin and cello playing together. They compliment each other. Each enhances the other's significance and effect. That's how these two parts work together .
I get that.. but how does
the school project seems to go together with America's experience?
America is being treated as a worker, as she herself says early on. And my impression with America is that she's often treated as merely labor, a second-class citizen. I feel that she sees that others think of her as being disposable, and this resonates with what she's writing about the workers. As I was reading her report, I felt that a lot of her interest in and empathy for that historical situation came from her own experiences and her own feelings of marginalization.
America is being treated as a worker, as she herself says early on. And my impression with America is that she's often treated as merely labor, a second-class citizen. I feel that she sees that others think of her as being disposable, and this resonates with what she's writing about the workers. As I was reading her report, I felt that a lot of her interest in and empathy for that historical situation came from her own experiences and her own feelings of marginalization.
What do you think?
Yep that's correct. And I was making sure I did extensive research before typing that chapter. The ironic part about making bombs-is that I just got another book about "Eastern Works" for my b-day which is a sequel to a different book about "Stolen Children"
@CathyTea I'm building a homeless shelter at the moment for my sim' story. it's kind of is essitenal to my story.. i'm debating on to put a 2nd story on the shelter to have an 'office' area for job seekers
Comments
Funny chapter! You're so great with punchlines!
Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
That's one awesome card! And HOW very, very perfect!
Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
I was admitted to the ER a few months back for reckless driving on the freeway and disassociation, my living situation was pushing me past the point that I could handle. My boyfriend encouraged me and told me I could work for just him and I and our future, to not think of our roommate, just to focus on us and it's really hard. I got a new job and have been working A LOT to make money so that my boyfriend and I can move. It is VERY stressful on me and I don't handle jobs or authority figures very well. I feel like a Jenga puzzle that's been all over the ground forever and now I've finally got the pieces piled back up, but pull one wrong piece and I'm crashing all over the floor again. I don't know how long I can hold this job for, but I have to do it for my boyfriend, for myself. It's seriously hard physical labor and stressful, but I have to find a way to get through it until I can make a living from home writing. I don't see myself doing anything else in the long run, with my mental illness I NEED a job that I can work from home for the long run.
It's gotten so bad that I have been living in my bedroom for 4 months, I haven't left my room to go into my own house in 4 months. I haven't cooked a meal in 4 months or sat in my own living room. There is a mini-fridge and microwave in my room that I use to live with in my bedroom. I have my emotional support animals in my room with me, so it's very crowded. I'm seriously struggling atm.
I'm trying to move in 2 weeks, my life will be all kinds of chaos until August. I will be moved into a nice, new apartment and get a fresh start. I'm already looking for a new psychiatrist and therapist so I can get back on medicine and in therapy sessions to help me with my illness. I failed all my classes last semester too. This is all embarrassing, but somehow I'm gonna figure my way through all this.
I don't know how active I can be in here until after August, I haven't even had time to update my stories Djinni's Lamp or LLS.
I hope that when I'm settled in my new home in August, I find the perfect therapist, get back on my meds so I can feel human again and fix my life so I can work towards my goal of being a career author and actress. I'm sorry to dump this all here, I just wanted you all to know that I haven't forgotten about you or these wonderful stories. I hope to be a lot more active after I'm settled in my new home.
Thank you.
I want to share a crisis line with you, so that you've got it when you need it: http://samaritansnyc.org/24-hour-crisis-hotline/
Here's another: http://www.suicide.org/
Please keep these numbers and website close at hand, so you've got them when you need them.
All the best to you as you move through this. Know that you're loved and that you have so much to offer this world and all the people in it.
Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
I feel dumb because I re-read that now and think I could have just as easily said "I'm having a difficult time right now." and it would have been sufficient. I'm sorry everyone. That's some heavy junk for a game website, feel free to skip it. I'm working towards something better soon.
Take some time off, don't stress. Things will get better, they always do.
I know I haven't exactly been active here either, but I've been reading your stories as much as possible! I'll try to leave a comment every once in a while
thanks i was going to make longer chapters but with this heatwave thinking is hard.
Oh thank you so much. You guys are so nice I'm over here crying like a little kid. BPD is the roughest thing I've ever encountered personally, for me and a lot of the women in my family. I hope your sister feels better soon and things get better for her, it's so hard. Depression will get you where it counts too, I'm glad there's others that know it's a struggle and encourage you to look past it. That's always so hard to do, especially when you're in the thick of it.
Thank you so much for reading my stories, it means so much to me. My boyfriend wants me to keep writing these stories so that I can get constructive criticism, improve my writing and prove to myself that I can write something good, mainly just to prove to myself that I can write something that is good. I don't have much faith in my writing skills, but it feels good to have my character's and my stories told. I'm trying to finish my first book this year and get it published because my boyfriend made a connection with Random House/Penguin Publishing and if I had a finished book, I might get to become a published author. I don't feel good enough for any of it, but I love my characters and the stories in my head so much that I think they deserve a chance to exist in the world.
Thank you, thank you.
I have been looking at fancy new apartments to make myself feel better. Since I'm making some money now and my boyfriend makes good money, we can afford to live in a nice loft in the city. I figure if I'm gonna have to be stressed out making money, I might as well love the place I come home to. I'm hoping that a nice environment will be good for my writing and I can finish my book quickly.
I hope something like this:
My boyfriend really likes the polished industrial loft look and all the large, open windows. I'm just excited to move somewhere nice. I'm kind of a killjoy though because I'd rather be on the ground floor and he'd rather have a view.
my mom would love if i felt like making money when stressed. i do the easy thing and fix it with ice cream and cookies.
LOL, I never feel like making money when I'm stressed. I just have to, I do however love your idea of a solution and am considering a trip to the store for some cookies, like a box. lol. I think I'm gonna go de-stress and watch some Star Trek. (With some cookies.
opps i wasn't suggesting you try that.
Too late!
I won't make it a habit though. I've already got my trampoline on the way and as soon as I move, I've got plans to start learning how to cook really well. But for tonight COOKIES!
iwas learning to cook . mom was teaching me. then temps reached 103.
Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
*confused*
Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
I get that.. but how does
What do you think?
Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
Yep that's correct. And I was making sure I did extensive research before typing that chapter. The ironic part about making bombs-is that I just got another book about "Eastern Works" for my b-day which is a sequel to a different book about "Stolen Children"
because i had no eltric i want to update a few times today.