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I need help with romance.

I'm an S2 player who also appreciates S3. I haven't been able to play 3 for quite a long time but with a new computer I have finally got all of 3 installed and running beautifully. So although I've played 3 quite a bit in the past I haven't really done much with pairing up sims. I am having a hard time getting my friendships up high enough to even begin to flirt or anything. Sims keep getting mad at my sim over really stupid stuff which of course drops the relationship score. As I recall, getting to the point where your sim can actually get romantic with another sim is not unlike traversing a minefield.

Please give me some tips on how to get a little love. My sims need to breed.

Comments

  • SPARKY1922SPARKY1922 Posts: 5,965 Member
    Hi @meljones

    I am hoping another player comes along who can provide further advice on this issue than I can as in my game it's easy to establish friendships and romance relationships unless the sims are divorced/separated or have definite opposite traits so i am wondering if you it could be the traits between sims? Also wondering if you use any mods as they can affect relationships sometimes as well. I hope you manage to get it sorted and congrats at being able to play 3 again :)
  • GraceyManorGraceyManor Posts: 20,079 Member
    What are their traits like?
    Do you have University? If so do they have any points in any of the influences(like jocks or nerds) I find nerds like to berate ignorance and
    that causes issues
    Have you tried giving both sims hopeless romantic traits?
  • meljonesmeljones Posts: 45 Member
    Does Hopeless romantic help? If so I will give everyone that trait. I am so used to S2 that I don't really remember what 3's trait system is like. I only use Overwatch, MC, and Relativity. I tend to avoid mods that require a lot of set up and stuff. I don't use SP for that reason but I might try the mod you suggested and see if I can figure it out. Thanks for the suggestions everyone.
  • GraceyManorGraceyManor Posts: 20,079 Member
    edited December 2019
    It might help.I use it for all my romantic sims.
    As for the mod above, that mod isn't suppose to be discussed on the site or linked to.
    Most people refer to it as the "W" mod instead.

  • SimmingalSimmingal Posts: 8,885 Member
    edited December 2019
    I haven't played ts3 for some time so not 100% sure but I think they get relationship points for things like watching sims play instruments or dancing together or playing games together so I'd try those cause I'm lazy and don't like tapping interactions all the time

    also if sim is not on lot computer chatting is a friend for when you just need to get relationship up a little so they stop hating each other
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  • meljonesmeljones Posts: 45 Member
    Well whether or not my sims ever find love I am having a ton of fun playing 3 again. And I am definitely gonna check out the mod we aren't suppose to mention.
  • SummerRoxySummerRoxy Posts: 93 Member
    I don't know if it's just me but repeatedly switching through the chat options can be tiring and only add a few relationship points. I find pillow fighting useful when trying to push sims' relationship meter up. After the points are more than 60 or so, I try the "mild" romance options like asking zodiac signs, ask if they're single, flirtatious joke and then attack from there. >:)
  • igazorigazor Posts: 19,330 Member
    With or without the romance element, TS3 sims will advance through relationship gains like crazy once they develop some Charisma skill and satisfy a couple of the skill challenges. After a certain point, most sims can befriend another practically by just walking past them or at least asking how their day was. At Level 0, where most of them would start out, yes building friendships is painfully slow. The skill needs a boost to get up to Level 1 such as by taking a Charisma class, reading the Volume 1 skill book, or practicing speeches in front of a mirror. After that, unless your sim is so socially awkward that they keep sticking their foot in their mouth during every conversation, the skill tends to build naturally through normal everyday conversations. Even more so in larger households where there's almost always someone around to talk to. :)
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  • SPARKY1922SPARKY1922 Posts: 5,965 Member
    Ahh yes lets not forget all those dating phone calls that usually end up in the cemetery lol serial killer dates anyone :D
  • simmerLellasimmerLella Posts: 612 Member
    Do you know what stupid stuff Sims are getting mad about? Are you visiting another Sim's house? No mooch trait, right? (Getting mad at mooches isn't stupid.)

    Wait, they removed the censorship of that word? I only used it because the OP did. :D

    I suppose work on the friendships, take that time, build charisma if it suits the personality vision you have, and note that a high attraction score helps the friendship LTR boosts, too.
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  • KelvinKelvin Posts: 6,899 Member
    edited December 2019
    If you have generations installed, considering gifting them something once your relationship is high enough with them. If you're not close to them chances are high they will not accept your gift.

    With seasons installed, you can have your sim create an online dating profile and send a message to the sim. They may respond and start sending you love letters or gifts through the mailbox if they are interested in a relationship.

    Alternatively, with Island Paradise installed, have your sim shakabra (not shakebra, lol) with the sim until their friendship bar is high enough for them to progress towards the next stage. Sims are really obsessed with this interaction for some weird reason.
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  • TurjanTurjan Posts: 1,713 Member
    edited December 2019
    I think the advice to get some basic charisma skill (like going to the library and quickly read a skill book there) is a good start. It helps a lot. From some point on (one of the charisma challenges), it gets ridiculously easy, as everyone starts at 45% or something like that. A bit further, you can just walk up to any sim and woohoo/try for baby.
  • meljonesmeljones Posts: 45 Member
    I think I am starting to get the hang of things. So much good advice, thanks Sims3 people. I've had sims get mad at my sim for asking where they went to school or for talking about something the target sim isn't interested in. Like, "How dare you mention the weather!" In sims2 you learn how to work around pitfalls like that but I think 3 is a little more complex. The trait system requires quite abit of knowledge to understand all the ways it affect things. One can have a very fun game and never get into relationships and babies but I'd like to establish a family and play kind of legacy style and use the resulting generations to explore aspects of the game I haven't tried.
  • carlystur03carlystur03 Posts: 435 Member
    One can have a very fun game and never get into relationships and babies but I'd like to establish a family and play kind of legacy style and use the resulting generations to explore aspects of the game I haven't tried.

    I'm glad this is all helping you! That's what I've been doing these days in one of my saves since I usually only play with a max of 2 sims per saved game.
  • igazorigazor Posts: 19,330 Member
    edited December 2019
    It should also be noted that, regardless of how much or little Charisma either sim has, one often has opportunities to pounce on newly learned things about the sims one is conversing with. If you find out through normal conversation that doesn't seem to be getting anywhere (+1 this, -1 that, sim thinks you are being boring, etc.) but learn they have let's say the Bookworm trait or they like to cook, that should open up Enthuse About Books or Food, and Admire Cooking Skill (or something like that). A little bit of flattery, in moderation, can go a long way; too much or too soon and it tends to backfire (sim thinks you are being strange or creepy). Or maybe you have learned their career, so talk about that when the options come up. The bonus relationship gains from talking about things the other sim is really interested in can be huge compared to chatting about the weather or about what your sim likes to talk about but are not mutual interests. Never try to present them with a gift if they aren't Friends or Good Friends (or better) first as they will immediately be suspicious of your intentions and accuse you of trying to buy their friendship -- not sure, but traits may play a role as to when in-person gifts become unconditionally acceptable.

    Apologizing immediately after having offended or bored the other sim to tears can help recover some of the relationship loss, a little bit. Smooth Recovery is huge and can wipe out the effects of a negative social ever having taken place, but that one requires Level 5 Charisma skill.

    Mods can help here, with NRaas MasterController we the players can learn all kinds of things about other sims before our sims do and sometimes we can guide these conversations accordingly. But the game itself will drop clues along the way as well. :)
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  • meljonesmeljones Posts: 45 Member
    @igazor, Yes! I am slowly beginning to pick up on some of these things. I'm remembering stuff I used to know but have forgotten from not getting to play 3 for so long. All these posts have really helped. 3 is a more complex game I think overall than 2. I read in here a lot since installing the game and sometimes am really surprised by how detailed mechanics wise some of the discussions are.
  • rubyskywalkerrubyskywalker Posts: 1,174 Member
    @KatyFernlily just wanted to make sure u know the link you posted above can raise the rating and should be removed soon. :wink:
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  • sunblondsunblond Posts: 1,035 Member
    edited December 2019
    I really had an issue with the whole attraction system. My Sims never seem to be attracted to anyone. ๐Ÿ˜ญ I just recently added a shimrod mod to disable that whole thing.
    I have found, that calling a Sim you want to eventually romance is a good way to take the relationship from acquaintance to friend, or friend to good friend, which makes inviting them over or out somewhere more successful.
    Also, keep you eye on the top left, where the chat interactions are, that will give you clues as to the mood of the convo. i.e. blahblahblah thinks your sim is being flirty, means to use more romance options, the light is green now, so to speak.
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  • AvataritAvatarit Posts: 836 Member
    I read the title and thought "Me too. Oh they meant in The Sims..."

    So anyway;)
    Make friendships first - use diversified interactions.
    Improve charisma skill (when my sims reach to a certain level they practically get a date invitation every day).
    Have your sim use computer to chat online, to meet new people.
    I find the lifetime reward "observant" to be useful, for example somwtimes it can reveal the fact that the other sim is unflirty... I find this helpful.
    Also it is important to use the romantic interaction "Ask if single".
    It is more difficult for some sims to find love thab others, based on their traits- Insane sims for example are a challenge. Friendly, charismatic sims are easier.

    (So far everything applies for real life too;))
  • simmerLellasimmerLella Posts: 612 Member
    I really had an issue with the whole attraction system. My Sims never seem to be attracted to anyone. ๐Ÿ˜ญ I just recently added a shimrod mod to disable that whole thing.
    I have found, that calling a Sim you want to eventually romance is a good way to take the relationship from acquaintance to friend, or friend to good friend, which makes inviting them over or out somewhere more successful.
    Also, keep you eye on the top left, where the chat interactions are, that will give you clues as to the mood of the convo. i.e. blahblahblah thinks your sim is being flirty, means to use more romance options, the light is green now, so to speak.

    Oh, man, I have the opposite issue. So much so that I grabbed the corresponding game file and tuned it. I massively reduced the "random" element and made other tweaks that appeal more to me. I haven't really tested it out in game yet but it'll be a relief if it's toned down and more meaningful.

    I guess that doesn't really help anyone else though, so I'll share things I found in the file. Apparently sims like high skills, high job level, wealth, celebrity status, certain moodlets (like minty breath and even suntanned) in addition to similar traits and compatible zodiacs. They're more shallow than I thought. :/
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  • AaeiynAaeiyn Posts: 521 Member
    Either I'm really lucky, or my natural Hopeless Romantic, in myself, just knows how Sims respond to certain Interactions. I, also, have a Mod, that adds a little bit more of Friendly Interactions, but I can't remember what were the natural Interactions, to begin with. So, forgive me, if these Interactions are not available.

    Typically, my Sim will do a Friendly Introduction. Ask about Age, Career, Sign and/or if the Sim is Single. Talk about Books, Gardening, Art, Cooking, Movies, etc. (if available). Get to Know, Chat. Admire, Express Fondness, Friendly Hug. Check to see if we've reached at least Friendship Status before proceeding forward with Flirting, Complimenting Personality and Appearance, Amorous Hug, etc. Wait for the Sims to feel allured, to gain access to Hand Holding and/or Massage. Once the Sims feel irresistible, go in for the Kiss! I tend to like "Heat of the Moment Kiss". It's so adorable <3

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  • SimiLovaSimiLova Posts: 1,123 Member
    I usually spam up any actions relating to the other Sim's traits or job. Like if they are into cooking, ask or swap tips. If they are athletic enthuse about going to the gym or needing to work out.

    And in between those, I will slip in a joke or if there is an option to cheer them up, or something. To which, I guess you have to see how the conversation goes and how receptive, the other sim is to yours. Want to add, with Uni or Showtime installed, I also like sharing internet videos or talking about live shows with the other sim. As, I guess with my Sims. The friendlier and more approachable, they seem. Other Sims are like, we enjoy having her around. Let's invite her to parties and I even had an invite to move in once. So guess it never hurts to spam a lot of friendly interactions. And if the vibe is right, ask a sim on a date or do a heat of the moment kiss, and see what happens.

    But, if all else fails, when I move a new sim into town, I try and watch for the notices that may or may not pop up, about so and so may think there is a connection, between you and them. Cause then I know, that 9 times out of 10, romantic socials are gonna be way easy to get away with, and get my sim and the other one dating and all that in no time.

    The only time it gets tricky for me, is when the sim that gets attracted to mine has no sense of humor, isn't flirty, or has the never nude trait. All of which make it a bit, trying to romance the other sim. Not that I haven't succeeded once or twice and had one of my Sims get married to a sim like this. But yea, til said other sim is in my household and I can make them active, to give my sim some romancing in return. Then yeah it's a challenge, I he other way around.
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