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The Kindness Bench for SimLit Writers - For All Games!

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  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    edited August 2020
    MadameLee wrote: »
    [quote="Simsophonique;c-17615505"

    --
    @madamelee : if the program you are going to follow is made by administration make sure you won't know anything about it until day one

    Well the last week of July the program said we would have a meet-up at the park the following week-the major days that the program would normally have a meet-up would be either Monday OR Thursdays (we never EVER had anything on Fridays. Since the Monday of the following week that meant Thursday was most obvious choice for the meet-up. I replied back to the calendar email (mentioning-the meet-up in said email) and asked questions like 1)what day is the meet-up, 2)what time, and 3)if i needed to bring food. That week from Saturday-Wednesay I religiously looked at my email and I got 0 response in any of the emails sections-not in "other" not in "junk". I then last Sunday talked to one of my friends from the program and she said the meet-up was suppose to have been on Friday. I emailed the leader again and their excuse was "well there could only be a limited amount of people and only 14 people showed interested but no one showed up on Friday". But I would have shown up had I known what the DAY Was..and like I said- we never had anything on the Friday-so I think people showed up on the Thursday and was wondering where the leader was.. and this is the 4th time the leaders have failed to communicate properly-twice without a phone/email tree, and twice with a phone/email tree.

    Hi, Magna! I'm sorry you had information lapses and fast food withdrawal. What good things happened this summer?

    I'm living in a Covid hotspot so I'm staying home and playing in the garden.
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • ThePlumbobThePlumbob Posts: 4,971 Member
    Hey @CathyTea ❤️

    I know you haven't necessarily made your own kindness bench post and are just replying to others, but I just had to reply there when I read that you feel socially isolated.

    I just wanted to say that you are such a big reason why this whole simlit community even exists, I still have such fond memories of the forums a few years back, and to me, you were the soul of the community, steering us all so buch better than how we knew. You have a true gift of knowing how to bond people and gently nudging them in the right direction, and are always so selfless and thoughtful with everyone. I know this is often taken for granted, and it really shouldn't be, so I wanted to say thank you for being exactly the way you are.
  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 29,362 Member
    I know one grateful reader doesn't make a crowd of readers, but I truly feel it counts for something.


    i agree with cathtea. i know shocking . i only had 3 readers when i started the benders. now i'm down to 1. it had picked up for a while but i had a lot of glitches. so cathteas the only one still around.
  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 29,362 Member
    playing in the garden.

    her happy place. :)
  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    ThePlumbob wrote: »
    Hey @CathyTea ❤️

    I know you haven't necessarily made your own kindness bench post and are just replying to others, but I just had to reply there when I read that you feel socially isolated.

    I just wanted to say that you are such a big reason why this whole simlit community even exists, I still have such fond memories of the forums a few years back, and to me, you were the soul of the community, steering us all so buch better than how we knew. You have a true gift of knowing how to bond people and gently nudging them in the right direction, and are always so selfless and thoughtful with everyone. I know this is often taken for granted, and it really shouldn't be, so I wanted to say thank you for being exactly the way you are.

    Aw, @ThePlumbob , what kind words! :)

    I don't feel isolated online--my online communities, this one and my Tamriel friends at ESO, are really great! So thank you!

    It's the in-person interactions that bring feelings of social isolation.

    Right now, I'm working from home due to the pandemic, and so I don't have to feel the daily exclusion or rejection that makes me feel isolated--and I don't have to mask at all at home because the person I live with accepts me! :)

    So, ironically, even though I only see one other person face-to-face each day, I feel much less isolated than I do when I go to the office each day!

    At any rate, thank you so much for your kind words! I think that having regular experiences of being excluded helps me appreciate inclusion, so I'm very happy to have contributed to an inclusive community here!

    I love that we can take long absences and when we come back, we're still remembered and welcomed and loved! <3
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    playing in the garden.

    her happy place. :)

    How did you know?

    And....did the rest of you know that August 17 is @friendsfan367 's birthday?

    Happy birthday, Sis!

    friendsfan01.png
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • ThePlumbobThePlumbob Posts: 4,971 Member
    @CathyTea I know exactly what you mean, I can relate to a lot of that (although it's not something I struggle with as much these days, I definitely used to!). Either way I'm glad you are in a good place now, and that you know there's lots of love for you here! :)

    @friendsfan367 Very happy birthday to you, hope you have a lovely day!
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    @CathyTea I got an Oreo Ice capp and a 10pack of Timbits (donut holes) at Tim Horton's last Wednesday. downsidE: I have a wound on my foot from my sandal running on it.
    6adMCGP.gif
  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 29,362 Member
    CathyTea wrote: »
    playing in the garden.

    her happy place. :)

    How did you know?

    And....did the rest of you know that August 17 is @friendsfan367 's birthday?

    Happy birthday, Sis!

    friendsfan01.png

    i'm phyic.lol kidding you showed me pics once. i think itwas during a conversation we had where i told you i have a brown thumb just like my sims. and you showed me your garden.
  • MonaSolstraaleMonaSolstraale Posts: 1,372 Member
    47d5UDRl.png
    I have no pictures of a garden but maybe you can use a nature plot instead.
    Happy Birthday! @friendsfan367
    I hope you have a nice day :)

  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 29,362 Member
    47d5UDRl.png
    I have no pictures of a garden but maybe you can use a nature plot instead.
    Happy Birthday! @friendsfan367
    I hope you have a nice day :)

    cathteas the nature lover. i'm allergic to everything. lol thank you. mr coffeee did so replies might be slower today.
  • MonaSolstraaleMonaSolstraale Posts: 1,372 Member
    @friendsfan367 Oops! Then maybe I should rather send a cake instead :flushed:
    I hope you are not allergic to whipped cream ;)
    2VMxytpl.png
  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 29,362 Member
    @friendsfan367 Oops! Then maybe I should rather send a cake instead :flushed:
    I hope you are not allergic to whipped cream ;)
    2VMxytpl.png

    no i'm not. is there such thing as a whip cream allergy? never heard of it. my keruig still works just not as strong. the coffee i mean.
  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 29,362 Member
    CathyTea wrote: »
    playing in the garden.

    her happy place. :)

    How did you know?

    And....did the rest of you know that August 17 is @friendsfan367 's birthday?

    Happy birthday, Sis!

    friendsfan01.png

    i just realized you did what i do to you. lol. for those confused the 23 of july is sissys birthday but i often post it the night before so the 22.. i did it 2 years in row now and she still acts suprised lol.
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    edited August 2020
    I'm trying to track down a gown/dress I had previously (I deleted it in my efforts to deal with my computer problem)-and on two different places i'm told to use the tray importer to find the dress-problem? I never saved the household with the dress ON..so they're basically telling me to do the impossible and find the dress that way. It's really annoying me (but I think I found alteratives instead)
    6adMCGP.gif
  • SimsophoniqueSimsophonique Posts: 1,410 Member
    edited August 2020
    @MadameLee : The leader of the meeting is bad faith or their organisation are very under par, I hope they'll correct this soon.
    ---
    Follow and read Miss V Detective (ts3 story)
    on wordpress: thesimsophonique.wp.com / on dreamwidth: simsophonique.dreamwidth.org
    Follow me on tumblr (sims only)
    simsophonique.tumblr.com (please no triggers I am autistic asperger)
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    @MadameLee : The leader of the meeting is bad faith or their organisation are very under par, I hope they'll correct this soon.
    ---

    This was about 4th time they screwed up since I started the program in 2013. With several different leaders in (leader's postion)

    In Febuary 2014 I didn't go to the program on the Monday (which was also assoicated with Chinese New Year) and the pipe burst in the office or something. I didn't know so when I went to the program that Thursday- I discovered that the program was closed. I did get upset at first but I just went back home. One leader



    In 2015 I could only attend this program once a week because the other day I normally attended the program I was busy with a different program and the program was planning on going to the Museum in a big city. The leaders had said for weeks prior to the museum trip they "would do something about lunch" that day. I show up on the Monday of the trip and get confused about why there wasn't any food and one of the leaders (one I kind of don't like) tried to claim "we have said from the start you would need to bring your own lunch/buy lunch".. but that wasn't the case since other people said they didn't say that until Wednesday of the week before (a day I wouldn't have attended even if I hadn't been going to the other program- I'm so thankful that at the time I had a bank card.. since without i I wouldn't have had any food since :8:30 that morning to about 4:00pm 2nd leader (in current leader's position)


    only this next incident plus the one I mention before had the same leader
    In March 2019 on the March 13 it was March Break for my local school board. And The program was suppose to have potluck on Monday March 13 and my parents had something to do back in our town. So they dropped me off at the program's building (and since they had to go around the building to get out due to road work infront of the building) and were planning on picking me up later. It just as I'm entering the building I notice a sign on the bulletin board saying the program was closed due to water shut-off. My parents were driving off and at first I did try to run up to them but when I was loaded with my backpack, the potluck cake, and containers for the coffee grounds. I couldn't. I couldn't remember anything about where they parents were going but the intersection of two streets. so I went nextdoor to the grocery store and talk to two mangers one a female manger was useless for me (told me to go to the local library 1) I didn't know where the library was at the time 2)even if I had known at that time.. I couldn't exactly carry a cake all the way there. The other manager a male one was a lot helpful he googled some clinics around the intersection I called one other clinic before I got a clinic who reponist was very helpful and I guess contacted the correct clinic where my parents were out. But I was so upset (I was crying)..I forgot about telling the Recopinist to tell the other recepnist to tell my parents I was waiting outside the grocery store next door to the building. Its only because Dad had to go around the building again he was able to get me (since he stupidly thought I was at the building)
    6adMCGP.gif
  • lisabee2lisabee2 Posts: 3,708 Member
    ThePlumbob wrote: »
    Hey @CathyTea ❤️

    I know you haven't necessarily made your own kindness bench post and are just replying to others, but I just had to reply there when I read that you feel socially isolated.

    I just wanted to say that you are such a big reason why this whole simlit community even exists, I still have such fond memories of the forums a few years back, and to me, you were the soul of the community, steering us all so buch better than how we knew. You have a true gift of knowing how to bond people and gently nudging them in the right direction, and are always so selfless and thoughtful with everyone. I know this is often taken for granted, and it really shouldn't be, so I wanted to say thank you for being exactly the way you are.

    Well-spoken! It is exactly how I feel! I owe so much to you ... you may not realize it but you have kept me afloat many times! Much love an many thanks!
    SebEwnF.jpg
    LisabeeSims
    New readers can visit here first: In-a-NUTSHELL
    #EAgamechanger
  • lisabee2lisabee2 Posts: 3,708 Member
    Hello. How are everybody?
    I am back at the simlit community after struggling with my game issues for months and time to have my new medication dosage to be effective, it takes months to be balanced. I am still tired but I got free days without sleeping all days to write again. So I started over Miss V Detective I hope it is better.
    I refollowed back a couple of my old readers and friends in wordpress but none of them followed me back . Wordpress is a pain in a plumbob because it does not allow me back to get my nickname and my blog adress as simsophonique only (I am thesimsophonique for the blog adress and simsophoniquesims for the gravatar profile). I was right to move on to dreamwidth because the new features on wp gives me nauseas, really I hate it, I post excerpts only there.
    If you liked my story or wants to speak to me I am still there even though since I am diagnosed Autistic Asperger I rather slow down my communication with the community ,to avoid to be not well understood, in private I had arguments I do not want to be angry with anybody.I only speak for saying something interesting. I also slow down my readings as well. Too much information are hard to keep in mind especially when I read in a language that isn't yours but you understand it globally not fully.
    ---
    About the target audience mine is close to 0 even 0. Simmers do not seems to be ready for a rewriting of the existing sims story with my sims/characters instead of the premades and much influenced by how I play the game. I dont care, I write and share for myself first. I have nothing to prouve to somebody but to myself. Playing writing and sharing are just hobbies. If people doesn't like I rather them to keep silence instead of insulting me, pushing me down, targetting me all the time at simsecrets or getting bad comments.

    you need to plus that by one .. I have always read your stories <3 I am glad to know you are working on the stories again.
    SebEwnF.jpg
    LisabeeSims
    New readers can visit here first: In-a-NUTSHELL
    #EAgamechanger
  • Kellogg_J_KelloggKellogg_J_Kellogg Posts: 1,548 Member
    This is for anyone who feels down about not having many...or any...readers of their work. My philosophy is that you create for yourself first because sometimes along comes an idea and it can't be contained; it has to be written down, painted, filmed or made. And then you send it out into the world in the hope that someone, or many, will enjoy it. Or maybe the audience is low or non-existent. The question then is was it still worth creating in the first place and I encourage anyone reading this to stand by their efforts and ask would it have been better not to bother at all and invariably the answer is usually no; it's not enriching to let a good idea wither.

    And there's a lot to be said about creating a body of work and letting it build up and up until people notice. I've found that with a couple of real life projects I've done....no views or hits for months but I kept producing work until people noticed that I'd been prolific and they decided to check out what I do. Then the views and likes came.

    At the moment I created something on the spur of the moment, my Sim story that I thought would be fun creating...getting the look of my world right, creating the Sims to be the main characters, wondering what stories could be told. Now I haven't had many readers but I still love the idea I've had, I still enjoy the gameplay that produces the stories and I wouldn't want to stop because it's not being as read as some of the big, established stories. I'm creating for myself first and every reader after that is a bonus.
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    I have a million problems with my parents. It was okay when I could go out and get some fast-food occasionally but as of Boxing Day, my province is locked down. And most of my hobbies are computer-related. and I currently can't volunteer in the current situation. Well anyway, I had chilli on Monday afternoon for lunch .. but I love cheese so much I used about 4 servings of it more than I should on it. Mom told me Dad had told her that sometime on Monday afternoon. But I'm an adult so I think I should do whatever I like, and I don't think Dad has any room to talk due to his food-related behaviour (ie he would sneak snacks of our party mix chips and popcorn or even his salted peanuts). Some people suggested I get a part-time job when the pandemic's over but since I'm on Ontario's disability income I don't think that will work (their suggestions were Starbucks and McDonald's) the latter I wouldn't get benefits not unless I was a full-time employee and I can play work 16hours per week at the most for the latter and that's barley even part-time and 14hrs for the former but I still could I think get benefits.
    6adMCGP.gif
  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    OK! You found this! Lockdown and the pandemic do make everything harder. Just trying to get through is enough.

    You could also try to set little goals for yourself, since you can't control anyone else, like doing an online workout a few days a week and maybe doing some history research.

    Have you thought about taking classes online? Where I live, the community college has lots of online classes, and some students say that doing the classwork really helps during the pandemic.
    @MadameLee (forgot to tag you!)
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    CathyTea wrote: »
    OK! You found this! Lockdown and the pandemic do make everything harder. Just trying to get through is enough.

    You could also try to set little goals for yourself, since you can't control anyone else, like doing an online workout a few days a week and maybe doing some history research.

    Have you thought about taking classes online? Where I live, the community college has lots of online classes, and some students say that doing the classwork really helps during the pandemic.
    @MadameLee (forgot to tag you!)

    due to one of my magazine subscriptions (which I really need to get caught up on) they "sold" my name to some things and one of the things is America's The Great Courses booklet thingy So I'm thinking about maybe learning about birding which is one of the courses. A funny (well not funny) course is called Living in Ancient Times
    6adMCGP.gif
  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    CathyTea wrote: »
    OK! You found this! Lockdown and the pandemic do make everything harder. Just trying to get through is enough.

    You could also try to set little goals for yourself, since you can't control anyone else, like doing an online workout a few days a week and maybe doing some history research.

    Have you thought about taking classes online? Where I live, the community college has lots of online classes, and some students say that doing the classwork really helps during the pandemic.
    @MadameLee (forgot to tag you!)

    due to one of my magazine subscriptions (which I really need to get caught up on) they "sold" my name to some things and one of the things is America's The Great Courses booklet thingy So I'm thinking about maybe learning about birding which is one of the courses. A funny (well not funny) course is called Living in Ancient Times

    Oh, that sounds so cool! I want to learn Latin, so I'll check out Great Courses. And I am a birder! It's one of my special interests! So I will love to talk about birds with you!

    I really feel that our special interests are our super power for mental and emotional health, so as long as we have time to engage with them, we gain resilience for getting through other challenging things.
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    edited January 2021
    CathyTea wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    CathyTea wrote: »
    OK! You found this! Lockdown and the pandemic do make everything harder. Just trying to get through is enough.

    You could also try to set little goals for yourself, since you can't control anyone else, like doing an online workout a few days a week and maybe doing some history research.

    Have you thought about taking classes online? Where I live, the community college has lots of online classes, and some students say that doing the classwork really helps during the pandemic.
    @MadameLee (forgot to tag you!)

    due to one of my magazine subscriptions (which I really need to get caught up on) they "sold" my name to some things and one of the things is America's The Great Courses booklet thingy So I'm thinking about maybe learning about birding which is one of the courses. A funny (well not funny) course is called Living in Ancient Times

    Oh, that sounds so cool! I want to learn Latin, so I'll check out Great Courses. And I am a birder! It's one of my special interests! So I will love to talk about birds with you!

    I really feel that our special interests are our super power for mental and emotional health, so as long as we have time to engage with them, we gain resilience for getting through other challenging things.

    I don't think Latin is a course in the "great courses" book. But now Mom is saying that I can just check out books from the library about birding/ how to become a better photographer. It would be a lot easier for me to read than having to deal with 24 lessons and between luminosity, and Duolingo (learning Korean) I have two many lessons (not counting the lessons I have on Hogwarts Mystery game which I been able to play for 2 weeks before Christmas on my computer). Dad put a bird feeder out in the fall and we had some birds like sparrows show up


    PS when you get around to it.. can you tell me what you think about Wyatt's history chapter?
    6adMCGP.gif
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