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Where are the fathers?

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  • pepperjax1230pepperjax1230 Posts: 7,764 Member
    edited June 9
    Gordy wrote: »
    Maybe the children are adopted. Maybe the father is simply a 🌺🌺🌺🌺 donor.
    A Mac eyeliner make-up donor.
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    That is scary looking. :D

    tenor.gif?itemid=5228641
  • AquaGamer1212AquaGamer1212 Posts: 5,100 Member
    CelSims wrote: »
    Showing both biological parents isn't a necessity, and the only reason a kid would ever develop this desire or need to figure out who their biological parents are would be if someone blew it out of proportion as this big ordeal to the point where they believed it was a thing they needed to know. I've known adopted people who did want to know who their bio parents were. I've also known adopted people who didn't care who their bio parents were, because their bio parents aren't their actual loving parents, and thus didn't matter. I'm sorry you have this expectation that someone is missing and should have been there in the game, but that's a problem you have conceived with the couples in Eco Living, and not really a problem that actually exists. As someone else has mentioned, if you think they need fathers, by all means use CAS to make them a father. Otherwise, just roll with it, because not every family or child needs to be held to heternormative standards and somehow believe that they're not whole just because they don't have 1 man and 1 woman involved in their kids' lives. I think you're walking on the knife's edge with this topic in terms of offending people, so you may want to be careful.

    Well you certainly managed to offend me. As someone who has not met one of my biologicals I can tell you that there are more reasons to wanting to know who they were than 'someone blowing it out of proportion'. Wanting to know where you came from genetically and the historical story of your particular set of genetics is NOT the same as wanting to meet that gene donor or have them in any way in your life.
    And it doesn't mean your adopted parents weren't actual loving parent either.

    If you look at the Tinker family in CAS, you will see that Yasmin and Tina are married. Yasmin is the mother of Olive, Tina is listed as 'household member' to Olive. Why can't I change that to also be mother? Same sex pregnancies are possible in game and even if the other parent was a donor etc, allowing that change would enable more accurately portray a happy family unit.

    No one said you couldn’t. That’s completely different than what others are talking about....
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  • LaBlue0314LaBlue0314 Posts: 16,993 Member
    In my game, most moms don't know who the dad is either. As far as gay couples, we have the Hecklings, a male gay couple that came with Cats and Dogs. I've kinda wanted to play them and let them adopt.

    I sort of have done something like that, in my case I had Brant use a sergeant for their children. The sergeant is not in the picture, but he and Brent are the parents. The biological mother is not in the picture and the kids don't have her in their relationship family tree (did a little adjustment in CAS on the family tree). But the youngest son has her blue eyes.
  • AquaGamer1212AquaGamer1212 Posts: 5,100 Member
    LaBlue0314 wrote: »
    In my game, most moms don't know who the dad is either. As far as gay couples, we have the Hecklings, a male gay couple that came with Cats and Dogs. I've kinda wanted to play them and let them adopt.

    I sort of have done something like that, in my case I had Brant use a sergeant for their children. The sergeant is not in the picture, but he and Brent are the parents. The biological mother is not in the picture and the kids don't have her in their relationship family tree (did a little adjustment in CAS on the family tree). But the youngest son has her blue eyes.

    *surrogate
    ts4_blossom_meadows_world_icon_gif_fan_art_by_hazzaplumbob-d.gif

  • kwanzaabotkwanzaabot Posts: 2,220 Member
    Gordy wrote: »
    Maybe the children are adopted. Maybe the father is simply a 🌺🌺🌺🌺 donor.
    A Mac eyeliner make-up donor.
    EZnaus_XsAIYFcP?format=jpg&name=large

    AHAHAHA XD!! Perfect!


    ...But in all seriousness, does it matter where the fathers are?! Two women are perfectly capable of raising a child. >.<

    Sure, but what if you want to tell a story where Knox tracks down his biological father?
    In old Sims games Knox's parentage would've been a mystery the community would've been obsessed with solving.

    Heck, look at Johnny Zest and people wanting to know how he fits into the Landgraab family. You don't get stuff like that in recent packs.
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  • SERVERFRASERVERFRA Posts: 2,505 Member
    It's a world where the men are an endangered species. Lol
  • kwanzaabotkwanzaabot Posts: 2,220 Member
    SERVERFRA wrote: »
    It's a world where the men are an endangered species. Lol

    Yeah, they're dying from exposure, because nobody makes clothes for them
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  • MonaveilMonaveil Posts: 422 Member
    I change any pre-made that I have any degree of interest in to fit in with my game. Truthfully, very few pre-made households interest me so almost all of them are deleted and replaced with my own households. I don't let EA/Maxis define how my game is populated.

    I don't have Eco Living yet, but from what I've seen during Let's Play videos by various Game Changers I already know which of the pre-made households I plan to delete for various reasons including traits that don't match aspirations. From my experience, those Sims are broken. Unless Knox is flawed somehow, then it seems that he might be the only pre-made from this pack that's worth keeping.
  • NushnushganayNushnushganay Posts: 5,530 Member
    I agree that anyone can add or subtract what they want or don't want in their game, but the point about lack of representation of one kind of same-sex family with kid(s) whereas there is abundant representation of another kind, both with and without kids, is valid.

    Viewed through another lens, say race, would it be okay if there were no all-Black families in the townies? There are many all -white families, a few families with one parent of color, but if there us not even a single all-Black family, what is that representing, and is it enough that players can make their own if they want one?

    Hmmm.
    Remembering the Great Gingerbread Massacre. They did not fall in vain. BTTYmSB.jpg
    My pronouns are they/them and he/him

  • EdithVEdithV Posts: 631 Member
    If someone is adopted by two women there are no fathers? Likewise there are no fathers if ❤️❤️❤️❤️ was donated, that person was just a ❤️❤️❤️❤️ donor. I have a family member who had a child by going to a ❤️❤️❤️❤️ bank and neither she nor her child consider the ❤️❤️❤️❤️ donor the father, even if it’s biologically the case. If you have two mums you’re not ‘missing’ a father, you have both of your parents. This post seems like an over reaction to nothing.
  • dearie_blossomdearie_blossom Posts: 350 Member
    The Sims is a game that is mostly played by girls and woman who mostly play with female characters so what‘s so bad about having more female representation and female clothes? Games marketed towards men are called progressive for having one female character but games marketed towards women always have to cater to poor, oppressed men. Wake me up when Assassin's Creed and GTA has a 50:50 male to female ratio.
  • BloosmooBloosmoo Posts: 716 Member
    Here's a kicker, maybe Yasmin is bisexual and now in a lesbian relationship, or maybe she's pansexual. Nobody demands to know where Mila Munch's kids sprang from like that. The assumption you make is that kids need their fathers in their lives, what if that father is abusive? What if that father is so into drugs that he can't see straight never mind the child in front of him. Do they still need the influence of that father? The same goes with mothers too. In the real world kids get taken off their parents for all sorts of horrible behaviour, is that kid better off then with it's bio parents because they are 1 man and 1 woman, or are they better off with a couple of the same gender who will love them no matter what? Are single mothers or fathers better parents for staying with an abusive partner, do the kids do better when they hear Mum and Dad arguing and fighting? You have an opportunity here to create some amazing stories to entertain yourself with and it'll give you less agro so why not do that? You have endless possiblities if you want to know who Olive's father is. Could it be Brent or Brant Hecking doing a favour for their friends by donating tadpoles. Could it be that Yasmin had a one night stand with say....Sergio Romero and knowing that he hates kids never once told him of the result of their carelessness. Could it be that you change your cas options so same sex couples can have kids....loads of stories waiting to be told.
  • katrinasforestkatrinasforest Posts: 975 Member
    edited June 10
    CelSims wrote: »
    If you look at the Tinker family in CAS, you will see that Yasmin and Tina are married. Yasmin is the mother of Olive, Tina is listed as 'household member' to Olive. Why can't I change that to also be mother? Same sex pregnancies are possible in game and even if the other parent was a donor etc, allowing that change would enable more accurately portray a happy family unit.

    CAS doesn't show the stepmother relationship, though, which would be the case if Olive was adopted prior to Yasmin and Tina meeting. (Don't have the expansion yet, so I can't check either way.)
  • SimmervilleSimmerville Posts: 8,576 Member
    It's pretty easy for us to create any sim's background story as we want. Technically, a child can not have more than 2 parents, so the game would not be able to show 4 parents when a child was say adopted. But - we can use our free imagination, create extra sims in CAS even if it is only to have one photo taken, you can base a new CAS sim on existing DNA, if that matters.

    In my game the first thing I do when getting a new pack is to create at least one previous generation in order to take some photos for the family photo wall. I also like them to have a couple graves - especially if the household is local and not recently moved in from say Sim City. On my blog I'll shortly present the 3 most important Industrial pioneers of my Evergreen Harbor:

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    Simmerville on Youtube | My blog is updated weekly: Simmerville's Sims
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  • thecatsredthecatsred Posts: 327 Member
    One of the moms transitioned after the kid was born. Problem solved.

    Change it if you don't like it. It doesn't matter.

    I'd like to see more gay men with families though. I hate how Brant and Brent have almost the same name so I always change Brant to something else.
  • SjofnSjofn Posts: 296 Member
    edited June 10
    Or, make more male same sex couples with kids. Gay men start families too, you know...
    That's what bugs me currently, there's three lesbian couples with a kid (cool), and zero gay dude couples with a kid (boo).

    MDianaSims wrote: »
    The family description actually states that Knox is adopted, so that one is solved. His biological parents have probably died by flies or something.
    I haven't adopted a kid in TS4 in years (like ... I think before the family tree was even patched in!) but I'm pretty sure those kids don't have 'biological' parents listed, only their adoptive parents.
  • bryanovensbryanovens Posts: 39 Member
    > @thecatsred said:
    > One of the moms transitioned after the kid was born. Problem solved.
    >
    > Change it if you don't like it. It doesn't matter.
    >
    > I'd like to see more gay men with families though. I hate how Brant and Brent have almost the same name so I always change Brant to something else.

    Is that the only male couple in the game? I've only recently began investing in a few of the EPs so I was wondering if there's another couple I've missed.
  • HeyYoDiscoNickHeyYoDiscoNick Posts: 445 Member
    I'm thinking OP is just using this "won't someone please think of the fathers" thing as a smokescreen for the fact that these families headed by lesbians make them uncomfortable. Have they been advocating for the devs to make the game start generating biological for all the kids our Sims adopt in game? Or have they just chimed in now that a world was released where half of the families are headed by a lesbian couple?

    The idea that not including biological fathers for these kids is sexist is...a stretch. The fact that there are four "canon" lesbian couples, three of whom have children (I'm counting the couple on the cover of the rebranded base game who are on the gallery), and only one gay couple who are childless. Well, I could see an argument being made that that *is* a little sexist.

    I feel like the people making premades are simply being inspired to make female same sex families more often than male ones. I don't suspect any prejudiced intent. But I would encourage the Sims team to reflect on how there might be some hidden biases at play.

    Won't somebody please think of the gay fathers?? And lesbians deserve to be child-free too!
  • RosettasStonedRosettasStoned Posts: 3,791 Member
    edited June 11
    I'm sorry I've upset you all over the families. It's just that I lost my Dad last month. He passed away on Mothers Day. I can't handle it, so I go into the game and see the fathers missing. It just triggered me. I'm so heartbroken and sad.
    I wish it were so easy to just go use cheats to bring him back, like the game. I feel sorry for the kids who will never know how great their Dad was.
  • KaeChan2089KaeChan2089 Posts: 4,944 Member
    I'm sorry I've upset you all over the families. It's just that I lost my Dad last month. He passed away on Mothers Day. I can't handle it, so I go into the game and see the fathers missing. It just triggered me. I'm so heartbroken and sad.
    I wish it were so easy to just go use cheats to bring him back, like the game. I feel sorry for the kids who will never know how great their Dad was.

    I am so very sorry, I am apologize for being so rude, but if you truly want the father's in the game, never hesitate and create them and use cheats to make them related <3
    <3
    Please hang in there.
  • HeyYoDiscoNickHeyYoDiscoNick Posts: 445 Member
    I'm sorry I've upset you all over the families. It's just that I lost my Dad last month. He passed away on Mothers Day. I can't handle it, so I go into the game and see the fathers missing. It just triggered me. I'm so heartbroken and sad.
    I wish it were so easy to just go use cheats to bring him back, like the game. I feel sorry for the kids who will never know how great their Dad was.

    I'm very sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how difficult that must be. I hope you are surrounding yourself with people who love you and being gentle with yourself.

    It sounds like you might be projecting some of your pain on these poor Sims, which I think is pretty normal. I would encourage you to explore that. I'm willing to bet this game can be a great tool for working through a lot of stuff.

    Though I would like to point out that these children's fathers aren't "missing." They simply don't have them. And that's okay! They both are lucky enough to have two loving parents! Not every child needs a father and a mother. That is an argument that has been used against LGBT+ parents for decades, and single parents even longer. Hearing that can be triggering for some.

    I don't have a Father, and I don't consider him missing either. I'm not incomplete without him, and my life has always been better for not having him in it. I'm not looking for sympathy here. None of this causes me any pain.

    Not all dad's are great. Yours was, and that's beautiful. I'm so glad you had that in your life, and I'm so sorry that he is gone.
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