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  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    edited March 2017
    I have a problem.. I'm going to say in the upcoming chapter that Juliet's twin Hailey is an actor (who got inspired by her grandaunt, Maria who played a teen Joyce in the Soap Opera Ashes 2 Ashes TV show) but I never mentioned it before now..maybe just have pictures of her plays (from the past) be good in this chapter? Since her acting ablities didn't get established before hand
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  • AudreyFldAudreyFld Posts: 6,695 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    I have a problem.. I'm going to say in the upcoming chapter that Juliet's twin Hailey is an actor (who got inspired by her grandaunt, Maria who played a teen Joyce in the Soap Opera Ashes 2 Ashes TV show) but I never mentioned it before now..maybe just have pictures of her plays (from the past) be good in this chapter? Since her acting ablities didn't get established before hand

    That would certainly be a good way to show it happened. Using flash back photos that are a little faded is nice.

  • purplestarz2006purplestarz2006 Posts: 340 Member
    Wow, @cecerose0208, those were amazing comments.Thank you so much. I'm glad you liked Haiti-you're right, the toddlers brought a whole new personality to things. I will definitely keep what you said in mind as I go forward, especially the part about paying more attention to the personality traits and throwing more social events. (I am trying to get in the habit of at least throwing them actual weddings.)

    Weddings sure, but no rush to add birthday parties in.

    At the risk of immediately contradicting myself, I've gotta say, I love how your Sims kept aging up without birthday cakes. It felt like an SNL-level running jokes throughout the cycles, like, "oh plum, forgot to make another Sim a cake, darn!" I'm smiling now just thinking about it, hehe.

    Yeah, it has become sort of a running gag. I swear, I do try to get everybody a cake...but I always end up being distracted by other things going on in the house. Even on the lot I just posted today, I got the backyard all decorated for the party and then the dad aged into an elder about 2 hours too soon.

    You were right about the social events, though. The ones I did manage to squeeze in in time were really fun to watch. (Probably going to have to forgo the "prestige event" thing though since I was so preoccupied with trying to fill all the goals it was hard to take screenshots.)
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  • cecerose0208cecerose0208 Posts: 1,521 Member
    AudreyFld wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    I have a problem.. I'm going to say in the upcoming chapter that Juliet's twin Hailey is an actor (who got inspired by her grandaunt, Maria who played a teen Joyce in the Soap Opera Ashes 2 Ashes TV show) but I never mentioned it before now..maybe just have pictures of her plays (from the past) be good in this chapter? Since her acting ablities didn't get established before hand

    That would certainly be a good way to show it happened. Using flash back photos that are a little faded is nice.

    I agree that screenshots made to look older should do the trick. I wouldn't expect to more every single thing about every Sim, not even ones born and raised in game. Also, interesting new details about the characters make me as a reader feel closer to them, as long as those details don't feel out of character.

    On another note, I saw that you posted this same question in the Writer's Lounge, and I didn't respond because it felt like the conversation had kind of moved on already. So I'm really glad you posted it here. I'm glad this feedback threat exists, otherwise I probably wouldn't have responded, and I'm sorry about that because you asked a really important question.
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    AudreyFld wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    I have a problem.. I'm going to say in the upcoming chapter that Juliet's twin Hailey is an actor (who got inspired by her grandaunt, Maria who played a teen Joyce in the Soap Opera Ashes 2 Ashes TV show) but I never mentioned it before now..maybe just have pictures of her plays (from the past) be good in this chapter? Since her acting ablities didn't get established before hand

    That would certainly be a good way to show it happened. Using flash back photos that are a little faded is nice.

    I agree that screenshots made to look older should do the trick. I wouldn't expect to more every single thing about every Sim, not even ones born and raised in game. Also, interesting new details about the characters make me as a reader feel closer to them, as long as those details don't feel out of character.

    On another note, I saw that you posted this same question in the Writer's Lounge, and I didn't respond because it felt like the conversation had kind of moved on already. So I'm really glad you posted it here. I'm glad this feedback threat exists, otherwise I probably wouldn't have responded, and I'm sorry about that because you asked a really important question.

    I have expereince with editing those kind of photos since I needed to for my "Mirror of Memories" chapter in Gen 2 and to show flashbacks later on in Gen 2 of Hannah's and Jacob's story arch in the chapter "Jacob's story"

    I just am worried at the moment about if the ending of the chapter (5.11 Double-crossing) if it works plot-wise for Juliet's and Clayton's (her step-father) talk about plot-related element

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  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    [

    I just am worried at the moment about if the ending of the chapter (5.11 Double-crossing) if it works plot-wise for Juliet's and Clayton's (her step-father) talk about plot-related element

    I thought it worked really well. It serves a definite purpose plot-wise, while at the same time, it's useful for character-development, too. I really enjoyed that scene as a reader.
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    edited March 2017
    CathyTea wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    [

    I just am worried at the moment about if the ending of the chapter (5.11 Double-crossing) if it works plot-wise for Juliet's and Clayton's (her step-father) talk about plot-related element

    I thought it worked really well. It serves a definite purpose plot-wise, while at the same time, it's useful for character-development, too. I really enjoyed that scene as a reader.

    @CathyTea what character development? I wasn't even aware that Juliet had any character development when doing the composition of the story. (you can probably know where I learned that word from the channel I'm geeking over)

    Post edited by MadameLee on
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  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    CathyTea wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    [

    I just am worried at the moment about if the ending of the chapter (5.11 Double-crossing) if it works plot-wise for Juliet's and Clayton's (her step-father) talk about plot-related element

    I thought it worked really well. It serves a definite purpose plot-wise, while at the same time, it's useful for character-development, too. I really enjoyed that scene as a reader.

    @CathyTea what character development? I wasn't even aware that Juliet had any character development when doing the composition of the story. (you can probably know where I learned that word from the channel I'm geeking over)

    Oh, look! I never answered this!

    What character development? Well, there is so much character development in your story.

    Of course, every single diary entry develops the character, for we get to hear her or his voice, thoughts, mood, attitude, and perspective on what happens.

    The screenshots also develop character as we see how the character dresses, stands, uses physical space/distance, gestures, and facial expressions.

    And the behavior and choices also develop character.
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    CathyTea wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    CathyTea wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    [

    I just am worried at the moment about if the ending of the chapter (5.11 Double-crossing) if it works plot-wise for Juliet's and Clayton's (her step-father) talk about plot-related element

    I thought it worked really well. It serves a definite purpose plot-wise, while at the same time, it's useful for character-development, too. I really enjoyed that scene as a reader.

    @CathyTea what character development? I wasn't even aware that Juliet had any character development when doing the composition of the story. (you can probably know where I learned that word from the channel I'm geeking over)

    Oh, look! I never answered this!

    What character development? Well, there is so much character development in your story.

    Of course, every single diary entry develops the character, for we get to hear her or his voice, thoughts, mood, attitude, and perspective on what happens.

    The screenshots also develop character as we see how the character dresses, stands, uses physical space/distance, gestures, and facial expressions.

    And the behavior and choices also develop character.

    except was Juliet's character delevopment?
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  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    edited April 2017
    I'm only on the toddler years for Gen 6 and I kind of want to know since Sara (Selene's cousin) will be able to go to school and get a bit more food then (Selene) how would a step-mother act when the Prince (or one of the King's Servants) is looking for Selene towards Sara?

    Post edited by MadameLee on
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  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    I need some comedy for this current Gen 6 situation but I don't know how to input comedy..into it....
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  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    I need some comedy for this current Gen 6 situation but I don't know how to input comedy..into it....

    Well, for one thing... "input comedy... into it..." is pretty funny! :D

    So, that points out that repeated language "input/into" and also ellipses can be kinda funny...

    Physical comedy (bumping into things, dropping things, tripping) is funny--as long as no one gets hurt.

    Absurdity--which the Sims is famous for--is pretty funny, as is incongruity... for example, suppose you have a really serious scene, but there in the background is one of those San Myshuno guys in the one-piece swimsuit and shamrock top hat--that always makes me laugh!

    Sometimes, the Sims provide plenty of humor just by the goofy things they do.

    Comedy routines (like "Who's on First") can provide some good inspiration, too!

    And don't forget satire (Animal Farm, anyone?)

    I always find bananas to be funny. :D
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    CathyTea wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    I need some comedy for this current Gen 6 situation but I don't know how to input comedy..into it....

    Well, for one thing... "input comedy... into it..." is pretty funny! :D

    So, that points out that repeated language "input/into" and also ellipses can be kinda funny...

    Physical comedy (bumping into things, dropping things, tripping) is funny--as long as no one gets hurt.

    Absurdity--which the Sims is famous for--is pretty funny, as is incongruity... for example, suppose you have a really serious scene, but there in the background is one of those San Myshuno guys in the one-piece swimsuit and shamrock top hat--that always makes me laugh!

    Sometimes, the Sims provide plenty of humor just by the goofy things they do.

    Comedy routines (like "Who's on First") can provide some good inspiration, too!

    And don't forget satire (Animal Farm, anyone?)

    I always find bananas to be funny. :D


    You don't happen to be a fan of a youtube "show" called Wheezy Waiter? (I only heard of it from HIM (you know? Matt)

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  • AkramAAkramA Posts: 2,717 Member
    I definitely need feedback for my first chapter of my new story because this is the first time I made a story with world building. I wanted to know if the way I describe this type of world is confusing or not. Along with how the controversial theme if it's gone too far or not. I also wanted to state that English is not my first language so PM me if it's a grammar or context issue. Here's the chapter!

    Montero Branch Chapter 1
    I also write non sims stuff on Wattpad
  • AudreyFldAudreyFld Posts: 6,695 Member
    AkramA wrote: »
    I definitely need feedback for my first chapter of my new story because this is the first time I made a story with world building. I wanted to know if the way I describe this type of world is confusing or not. Along with how the controversial theme if it's gone too far or not. I also wanted to state that English is not my first language so PM me if it's a grammar or context issue. Here's the chapter!

    Montero Branch Chapter 1
    Since it's your turn in our circle - maybe we can discuss this story and some of your questions there instead of the last one.
  • AkramAAkramA Posts: 2,717 Member
    I guess, but I think I want the circle to focus more on Castellon Legacy.
    I also write non sims stuff on Wattpad
  • AudreyFldAudreyFld Posts: 6,695 Member
    AkramA wrote: »
    I guess, but I think I want the circle to focus more on Castellon Legacy.
    Of course! And it appears we've already begun. :)
  • AudreyFldAudreyFld Posts: 6,695 Member
    edited April 2017
    @AkramA - I love that you flip-flopped the theme. I think as long as you do what a lot of the Amazon challenge writers do which shows a change in how they treat their "breeders" you will be fine. And with your humor, I think you can show just how strong the women are and how sensitive the men are. I'm looking forward to reading it.
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    edited April 2017
    I want to show the so-called bad kids (Leah ((step-sister-like character)), Melissa ((birth sister and twin to Selene)), Elliot and Jay ((Selene's future husband no not the prince he's someone else entirely and it's short-live)) ) doing bad things.

    Messlia been serial dating. Leah doing graffti Elliot will be stealing. Well maybe Jay doesn't do anything bad..
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  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    I want to show the so-called bad kids (Leah ((step-sister-like character)), Melissa ((birth sister and twin to Selene)), Elliot and Jay ((Selene's future husband no not the prince he's someone else entirely and it's short-live)) ) doing bad things.

    Messlia been serial dating. Leah doing graffti Elliot will be stealing. Well maybe Jay doesn't do anything bad..

    That sounds effective!

    I don't always think of graffiti as something bad, myself--unless it's writing negative things or gang markings or something.
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 32,748 Member
    CathyTea wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    I want to show the so-called bad kids (Leah ((step-sister-like character)), Melissa ((birth sister and twin to Selene)), Elliot and Jay ((Selene's future husband no not the prince he's someone else entirely and it's short-live)) ) doing bad things.

    Messlia been serial dating. Leah doing graffti Elliot will be stealing. Well maybe Jay doesn't do anything bad..

    That sounds effective!

    I don't always think of graffiti as something bad, myself--unless it's writing negative things or gang markings or something.

    *cough* rotten to the core? video remember *cough* in this case its bad (up until a point later in the story when it's going to be helping)

    I don't know what I should do about Jay ..maybe have his dad take me to one of the "nightmares coming true" and he's so chicken by it he's beeing punished for being a chicken by beaing treated like Carlos was in the Descandants movie (Disney one)
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  • InfraGreenInfraGreen Posts: 6,693 Member
    I promise I'll answer a fresh question in here someday (though graffiti is one of those low-tier offenses...I've written strange stuff on school desks too. It's a contextual thing because commissioned street art is a different situation from spraying the side of the building just because).

    But instead I have one. No Stars over Uptown spoilers are in spoilers, though these are pretty mild.

    So I've never written identical twins in simlit, mostly because I never got them naturally. But I've always wanted to, because identical twins are often used entirely for visual tricks in fiction. Like, having eerily similar siblings, the humor behind identical twins who are wildly different in terms of style and personality, use in plots where you need two identical-looking people, etc. And why do that when you can have two characters who are characters with a sibling dynamic, who just happen to be identical twins?

    What's bugging me is that, yeah, simlit is visual. Characters should be able to be visually differentiated, and it's tougher to do with identical twins unless the point is for them to look incredibly alike. And in my drafts for these two, they're not alike but they're not wildly different, stylistically. They're both comfortably put-together and big on sweater/button-down shirt combos (my fave tbh). One has more muscle and broader shoulders, which is tough to see under his clothes anyways.

    I guess my questions are:

    1. Are identical twins in simlit confusing? To be honest, I almost never see them written.

    2. If, without context, you saw these two in a story, would you get needlessly confused as to who was whom?

    3. Is it worth it? If it helps, nothing in the plot is dependent on these guys being identical. I just thought it was a bright idea for a hot second.

    And pics/identities under the cut. You've been warned, readers...

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    Andrea. The dead one, yet the one we care the most about. Supposed to be alluring, troubled, and somewhat unfashionable. :p

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    Gianluca. Alive secondary character. Supposed to be kind and approachable but bitter.

    We've barely seen Andrea at all, and Gian won't be introduced for a while, even though he's family to a lot of main Uptown characters. So if you want to suggest changes, now is your time!
    A thousand bared teeth, a thousand bowed heads

    outrun / blog / tunglr
  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 23,088 Member
    OK... so you know how I feel about floppy hair, right? LOL!

    For some reason, I get an instant SimSquish/SimCrush on Gianluca. (Floppy hair, purple sweater, thin-dude, little frowny-smirk. Kind and approachable but bitter. No-duh.) Plus, he looks totally City--I'd expect to run into someone like him in any of my fav West Coast cities.

    So I would say YES! This is absolutely necessary and essential to your plot and not gratuitous at all!

    Seriously, though--they give off a very different vibe from each other, so it's fascinating right there.
    Plus, Andrea is pretty much the driving mystery of your story (as far as I'm concerned at this point in my reading experience with it), and so I'm highly intrigued by his twin brother. And what will Thu think/feel and how will she react/respond with him? I can't wait to find out!

    My niece has quads--three of them are identical triplets and the fourth is fraternal. They're still very young--about six. Being around them is fascinating, and has been since they were infants. Sometimes, the identical ones will share a gesture--but yet it's somehow different for each! And while all four have very similar speaking patterns and voices, each one adopts their own volume and cadence, so we can tell who's speaking! They seem really fascinated by their own similarities--and very comfortable with being similar to each other while also enjoying their unique expressions and interactions. Usually when I've seen them, there have been as many adults as kids, so they'll each choose one adult to talk with and spend the visit with that one person.

    I think it's fascinating, intriguing, and has so much potential! I really think you can have fun with this and explore some interesting angles.
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Do you also play The Elder Scrolls Online? You can find me there as CathyTea, too!
  • AudreyFldAudreyFld Posts: 6,695 Member
    @InfraGreen - I just introduced identical twins in my story. I love the idea for yours! More mysteries to untangle! We know one is dead so (or maybe not) hah. So it shouldn't be confusing.
  • InfraGreenInfraGreen Posts: 6,693 Member
    @CathyTea: Yeah I know you miss your real favorite man in purple. Hush. :p

    I haven't known any identical twins since I was a kid. I went to elementary school with a pair who were...pretty alike, right down to matching names (I considered it here but I couldn't find a good match for Andrea that wasn't too disgustingly close to my own real-life name). But I assume they differentiated themselves later on. Plus I didn't know them that closely.

    @AudreyFld: Maybe I'll just have to read. For inspiration. :p

    ---

    Actually, the solution came to me when I had the bright idea that maybe we have to introduce Gian earlier. And it's simple: for being identical, Andrea and Gian emote so differently. Gian is a lot softer than his brother. And it does fit the finer details of his personality and how he interacts with characters we already know. Whatever that will be.

    And he's the only man in the cast who wears purple. :p
    A thousand bared teeth, a thousand bowed heads

    outrun / blog / tunglr
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