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Group Work Dilemma
PurpleNightOwl
Posts: 205 Member
I bet lots of people on this site have had to work in groups. I've got a problem at the moment, in regards to university. I can't really go into specific details, like their name and such, but I'm at my wits end.
I'm working in a group of five people at the moment for a project. Four of us, including myself, are doing fine, working together, doing the work, communicating and co-operating, that sort of thing, but there's this one kid in my group who is doing zilch. They've got special needs, but this isn't really an excuse to be honest. They spend a lot of time at uni on YouTube or random forums, not doing work. They won't join in with discussions in our group. I sent a Skype message but they didn't get it (to be fair, they were away). I tried talking to them in class but they blatantly ignored me, so I got really narked and told my lecturer, who was sympathetic and had a word with them. Whether or not it worked I don't know. They just don't act like part of the group, and it's getting annoying. They haven't contributed anything. They did at the beginning, but recently they won't join in with discussions at meetings so how do they know what to do? I've tried talking about this issue with my group. Fat lot of good that did; they were very dismissive and snarky and said stuff like "that's them for you, they never do anything". REALLY helpful, so my other members aren't much help and show no real sympathy or support. I'm exasperated. I've already spoken to someone, like I said. They said to just ignore them, so should I? This person is still technically part of the team, and I don't want them failing and feeling left out. When we had to team up, I only let him join us out of sympathy because no-one else wanted them in their group (and I know how that feels). They do have a reputation for all the things I pointed out, lack of communication and co-operation.
What do I do? I don't want them coming up to me at the end of the semester and saying that I didn't include them or tell them what to do or whatever. They won't talk to me, face to face or online, and no one else wants to. I've already spoken to someone about it and don't want to keep pestering them about it over and over. I didn't really want to post this up here in case someone I knew saw this (but no one I know plays The Sims so maybe not).
Sorry if I sound a bit erratic and a bit mean and impatient, but I'm too soft to turn this person away because they do really good work when they're focused and I want to give them a chance, but I've pretty much given up. Has anyone else had a similar experience?
I'm working in a group of five people at the moment for a project. Four of us, including myself, are doing fine, working together, doing the work, communicating and co-operating, that sort of thing, but there's this one kid in my group who is doing zilch. They've got special needs, but this isn't really an excuse to be honest. They spend a lot of time at uni on YouTube or random forums, not doing work. They won't join in with discussions in our group. I sent a Skype message but they didn't get it (to be fair, they were away). I tried talking to them in class but they blatantly ignored me, so I got really narked and told my lecturer, who was sympathetic and had a word with them. Whether or not it worked I don't know. They just don't act like part of the group, and it's getting annoying. They haven't contributed anything. They did at the beginning, but recently they won't join in with discussions at meetings so how do they know what to do? I've tried talking about this issue with my group. Fat lot of good that did; they were very dismissive and snarky and said stuff like "that's them for you, they never do anything". REALLY helpful, so my other members aren't much help and show no real sympathy or support. I'm exasperated. I've already spoken to someone, like I said. They said to just ignore them, so should I? This person is still technically part of the team, and I don't want them failing and feeling left out. When we had to team up, I only let him join us out of sympathy because no-one else wanted them in their group (and I know how that feels). They do have a reputation for all the things I pointed out, lack of communication and co-operation.
What do I do? I don't want them coming up to me at the end of the semester and saying that I didn't include them or tell them what to do or whatever. They won't talk to me, face to face or online, and no one else wants to. I've already spoken to someone about it and don't want to keep pestering them about it over and over. I didn't really want to post this up here in case someone I knew saw this (but no one I know plays The Sims so maybe not).
Sorry if I sound a bit erratic and a bit mean and impatient, but I'm too soft to turn this person away because they do really good work when they're focused and I want to give them a chance, but I've pretty much given up. Has anyone else had a similar experience?
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Comments
I've been in your place before. As much as I'd feel bad for letting someone fail, I've learned that you can't just let people walk all over you. It really eats away at your soul after so many times. Let the person suffer the consequences of his/her actions.
Race Against the Clock: Can your elder sim turn back the clock before their time runs out?
DISCLAIMER: I'm ruthless during work hours, and I'm working right now.
Focus on your work and your success although uni is a really fun time etc it has a real life goal and it would be a shame for you to get side tracked and not get the results you should be getting from hard work because you let your emotions do the work instead of your brain.
*Remember you are only responsible for how you act. How someone chooses to react is their responsibility.
“Instead of putting players in the role of Luke Skywalker, or Frodo Baggins, I'd rather put them in the role of George Lucas.”Will Wright.
My W/list: http://store.thesims3.com/myWishlist.html?persona=rosey1579
Quite possibly however imo that still doesn't make it the OP's responsibility. Sounds like she(?) has wasted enough valuable uni time focusing on this person instead of her studies.
“Instead of putting players in the role of Luke Skywalker, or Frodo Baggins, I'd rather put them in the role of George Lucas.”Will Wright.
I've already done my work so far for this, so I haven't wasted my time worrying about this person over my work, but you're right. I should focus more on my studies than worry about what someone else is doing, because it's not my responsibility to worry about what someone else is doing with their own work. I just don't like seeing people get left out, because it's hurtful when someone gets dismissed by others, but in this case if that person's own attitude and behaviour is the reason they are left out, that's their own doing. I don't know what will happen in the long run. I don't know if they'll eventually be a meeting with the lecturers to discuss it, or they'll just drift out of the group and go their own way. It's just such a shame when it happens. Group work is a big part of university. I personally prefer to work solo but I know the benefits of working in teams and if you can't work in a team at uni, you're stuck.
That's the sort of attitude you need to have!
I'm nowhere near university age, but my sister is currently in her third year and this situation reminds me of her so much! xD
I don't know whether it's different where you are, but I know my sister tries to dodge units that include group work assignments (she gets a list of units to choose from; I think she chooses 4/5 a year, but I'm not really sure).
https://www.thesimsresource.com/members/DarkSuperNinja
If I could have my way, I'd never work on a group project. If I lucked out, I would get fairly decent group members who don't need prompting to move on their own. Only some of the people I've worked with have that kind of initiative.
Group projects define the saying "Hell is other people".
Race Against the Clock: Can your elder sim turn back the clock before their time runs out?
In another project where I'm working with someone else, which is a joke, because it turned out this person "left" unceremoniously and without letting me know, the selfish so-and-so, so now a group project has become a solo project, but I've decided not to care about them and carry on alone, and I'm doing just fine without them, but I'm very angry with them all the same, but the fact I'm still getting on and not giving up myself is a good feeling.
In another project working with another person they've been in and out on and off, if you get my drift. When they don't come in, they have some excuse, which is a bit unfair, but I've still done my bit, but luckily they seem to be back full-time and we're getting on with it, but I swear if I get a bad mark out of it I know who to blame.
In my final project there's four of us. There was five but the fifth member was someone who was doing another project with me and left, as I mentioned. We're getting on fine as a group but I personally don't think they're the best people to work with. They might have the technical skills but they don't fare well in team work, which is a hugely important skill for my course. One person thinks they're project member (they never says they are but they act like it), which annoys me because I'm actually project manager and I'm the only person doing the behind the scenes stuff like the documentation and no-one's bothered to do it except me. Anyway, about this person, they are very loud and arrogant and swear like a trooper, and they always make "banter" at me when it feels like bullying. This person asked me at the beginning of the year if there were projects they could work with me. I wished I said no looking back. This person hasn't done much compared to me. I've done two big models which took ages to do, and I started animating before anyone else, and this idiot had the audacity to critique my work like they're my tutor. Who the hell do they think they are? And also, they keep wanting to chat about our work on Skype. We don't have time to talk, just do! Another person doesn't join in with discussions outside the lessons, like on Skype or on Facebook, nor do they do what I ask of them. And they are so behind with dates, they're like "When's our presentation?" and I'm like "Uh, did you not read the course guide or check your emails. Keep up!" The third person hasn't done that much either. They did a really good model, and that's it (well, it's better than nothing) but they don't join in with discussions much and at uni they'd much rather watch stupid YouTube videos than get on with the work.
A while ago I went and complained about all this to my tutor as I was very upset and stressed. Later on, we had a one-to-one meeting and they sympathized with me but they said at the end of the day I should have teamed up with better people who are willing to work and not only pass but do well, which I thought was a very fair point. The people I teamed up with I only did so because they were people I knew well or they were sat next to me or I felt sorry for them because no-one wanted them in their team (warning bells!), which sounds a bit silly on paper. My tutor said I was too talented (not my words) to let my skills go to waste like that. I've definitely learnt my lesson. I'm going to work with people who I know want to do well, and a lot of people in my class are like that, and do well in general. I'm not going to be stuck with the "scrappers" and the "slackers" again, even if they are my "friends". I want to do well and I won't let people like that jeopardise my future. My "friend" who's in my group, actually said he wanted to work with me because I do well, so what does that mean, you're not going to pull your weight? Maybe I'm being unfair about these people because they're not bad they just aren't as ambitious as me to do well, they just want to pass.
I won't let this sort of thing happen in my final year, no way. They weren't wrong when they said don't just work with people because they're your friends.
Sorry, rant over, and don't think I'm a snob because I'm not, I just get angry when stuff like this happens.
Race Against the Clock: Can your elder sim turn back the clock before their time runs out?
1. You always end up in the worst group because everyone else you know that is reliable and hard-working is already taken.
2. The people in your group are the opposite of what you are: you're hard-working, dedicated and reliable.
3. You always end up doing most of the work, including trivial stuff like documentation, which bumps up your grade if you've done it properly. Also, no-one else contributes to the documentation, except maybe a tiny bit on the last day - too late!
4. You want to get all your work done and finished early so you can just hand it in on the deadline day, but you can't because everyone else likes to do things on the very last day, seriously?!
5. On the deadline day when you're counting on other people, and they don't come in until late afternoon and you've been in since early that morning.
6. People who mess about in class procrastinating and you're doing actual work.
7. People who don't know when the deadline and other important dates like presentations are (they send you a text saying "Oh yeah, when's our deadline?" Keep up!)
8. People who do most things at the last minute, even things that take ages to do, when you did your stuff about three weeks ago.
9. The one who never shows up, because they're "sick" (yeah right, they're just lazy and don't want to do work or come into uni. Some people are genuinely sick and others are skivers).
10. The one who bosses everyone around and tries to take over, even though they're not the leader (and this is usually the person who doesn't show up either).
11. The person who criticises your work and others for some stupid reason because they think they know everything but they don't. Get lost, I'll do it the way I want.
12. Lack of communication. Why don't you talk to each other?!
13. Seeing other groups getting on really well, when your group looks embarrassing in comparison.
14. Unfinished work.
15. People who drop out of uni or simply stop showing up without any word of warning. Selfish.
16. The bad ways of communicating with each other online, and when they don't immediately reply back or barely talk to you.
17. Loud, obnoxious group members. SHUT UPPPP!!!!!
18. People who don't work in the "holidays" (they're not really holidays, we don't have lectures but still need to work. Time ticking towards deadlines never stops).
19. People who don't read the criteria or module guide regularly.
20. People who have low expectations, or too ambitious.
21. People who aim high then it goes wrong.
22. People who have given up (their work didn't go according to plan).
23. People who take ages doing tasks, longer than necessary.
24. People who only care about themselves by putting other work first and not your group project.
25. When you end up with a half-finished project that has all your finished work, but one or two people have abandoned their work because they didn't finish it in time.
But it's not all bad...
Good Things About Group Projects
1. The workload is lighter (or so you think!)
2. You achieve more than you would alone.
3. When you're the high achiever and reliable person in your group, people look up to you.
4. If you've done more work than the others, you'll look good.
5. If you've had a bad experience working with some people, you know what to do next time. . .NEVER EVER WORK WITH THEM AGAIN, NO MATTER WHAT.
This applies to me. All the people in my group I never want to work with again. I felt like I did most of the work. None of them did the documentation even though I did ask them politely to contribute. Two people didn't have their work finished in time so it was half-finished, which meant that the whole thing wasn't fully finished. My tutor was quite pleased with me because I'd done a lot of work for the project and said it didn't matter if the others weren't finished because I'd done everything I needed (we get marked individually). On the deadline I was very stubborn and angry at my team. I didn't show it but my tutor knew how I felt. The one thing I definitely learnt from all this. . . never work with this team again. Next time, I want to work with hard-working, reliable people. Third and final year, here I come.
Another thing. I know this will sound harsh, but I hope the people in my group get what's coming to them, a big fat "F". Sorry but that's how I feel.
For my group project (when I was group leader and doing pretty much everything on time and being organised), I was the only person in my group who passed. I didn't get a very high mark but I still passed. My other team members failed. I look back and feel guilty because I was project manager (first time ever) and I felt I did an okay job, I just felt that my team members were outcasts and rejects and I was stuck with them, and they were the opposite of me. I was very annoyed when the work was half-finished. I didn't know if it was my fault for not being persistent enough, or my team member's fault for not caring and leaving things too late. Two of my team members didn't return for their third and final year, and one of my team members are still here by some miracle (personally I feel they should have been kicked out too).
Unfortunately for my other group project, I wasn't so lucky (the one where I was working with someone who disappeared without a trace for a month). I cringe at that too because even though our group was far too small to have a proper leader, I felt my team partner was very bad at communicating with me. To be fair, I wasn't that enthusiastic about the project because instead of making our 2D game from scratch with our own code, they just took a game we made in the first semester from a tutorial we were told to do and then copied stuff over it. All the code was copied and pasted (which I felt was cheating) and they tried to do everything themselves. For example, they would send a text saying, "I've done this and this, etc." when I was thinking, "Well, I could have done that, but you never asked, so now I've hardly done anything apart from make a few textures and sprites". I did get to make an inventory system though, but the work balance wasn't enough, so I was worried they'd get all the credit and say I hadn't done any work when they didn't let me. I was annoyed the day we handed it in because I was in quite early at university to do work and hand it in, but they came in much later and the game still wasn't finished (I hate this because I like finishing things early so you can go over it and it stresses me out). So that was probably one of my worst group project experiences at university (apart from the one above that I talked about). We both failed that assessment. It turned out not to be our fault in the end because the game wouldn't start because the examiner didn't read the instructions of how to start it, and a lot of people failed that one assessment. I managed to pass the module overall because my grade from my first assessment evened out the pass score. I still feel angry about that module now because it sparked an interest in programming in me. As for my partner, she passed the module too. She returned for the final year, but I've barely seen her since. She may show up when she feels like it, which is never. I've seen her work posted on our student portfolio site, but I never see her in person. She never shows up for lectures. This may sound harsh, but she's dead to me. I never want to work with her again. Or that other person who is still here by a miracle. I haven't.
For my third group project last year, when my team member vanished after two weeks and I had to work alone, I passed that one too. Actually, it's the highest mark I've ever received for a solo project, which is a big achievement for me. My partner apparently left because they kept getting 0 in their work (which you only get if you fail to hand in work), so good riddance they've gone too.
I'm in my third and final year now. I only have about 3 - 4 months to go. My final year is quite stressful (not really a surprise) but I'm enjoying it, and I'll be sad when I leave in the summer. I only have two group projects this year. One is my big advanced group project. My group is actually quite good. I'm not working with the bigwigs or boffins of my class, but I like my group. We all get on very well and have different skills and work well together. My group leader is a good leader (I considered being the leader but decided not to after what happened last time). Sometimes they don't show up to lessons but I think they're having quite a few personal health problems so I'm trying to make allowances for that. When they do show up they act like a group leader but not in a pompous way. We're making a game and so far it's looking good and getting positive feedback. I've spoken to other people from other groups and they have had some personal problems between them so I'm pleased I'm in this group and not with a bunch of drama queens. For my second group project (which we just started a few weeks ago), I'm working with the same people as my main group project. I did have a different group at first but some of the left to change modules so I joined up with my current team. So far everything's going fine, but my group leader is the same as the other group project. I'm a bit worried she'll get worn out but we're very cooperative.
I think my third year in terms of group work is going much better than my second year. My team may not be perfect, but who is? The reason I put this discussion up here was to warn people about what can go wrong with group projects. One thing I learnt is that not everyone changes or learns from their mistakes, like me. In my first year, I was disorganised. Now I'm a different person. Sometimes I do procrastinate but I'm much more disciplined than before.
Whoever has been through the same stuff as me or is going through the same stuff, I wish you luck for any current group projects or future ones.