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The Feedback Thread - For All Games!

Comments

  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    AudreyFld wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    But what could the two people either on the street or customer&employee see if all they see is out the window of the business? What could the passenger see?

    This is always intersting. They see pieces of whatever happens and it looks different from every perspective.

    well it's all a big Matt Guion (aka bandgeek8408) plotline. Since an O.C. character will be the son of Matt Guion and his wife (I made Sims of them) who will be the love interest of the yet unnamed heiress (I'm not done with Gen 6 yet)
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  • amy_queenamy_queen Posts: 65 Member
    edited June 2017
    Sorry in advance for the long post~
    Hello all ☺ So I come bearing a question with regards to trigger warnings for content, specifically with regards to (domestic) or just violence in general. I’m currently just reposting old simlit creations of mine, not writing new ones, and I hadn’t included any warnings when posting my story initially. I have finished posting everything now, and while reading various works from other authors, I’ve noticed they’ve mostly put warnings or tags in their posts to warn their viewers. Reading through the thread I noticed that to not spoil the stories in certain cases, the main pages of the blogs/sites have also been used as a place for warnings; however, for me, it’s not all the stories that I’m posting that need this warning (as I have several) so I’m not sure if that solution can still apply for me…

    In short: I was wondering if it would be possible for anyone to let me know if a disclaimer or some sort is necessary, and if possible the most recommended way to do so. The story is called Broken and as a whole it isn’t violent; however, these specific chapters are the only ones that reference/have such scenes. I appreciate your feedback ~
    Intro (reference)
    Chapter 3 (brief scene)
    Chapter 13 (slightly longer scene)

    side note: this is an incredible thread I hope to come back to often~ either for more questions or to help if I can
    side side note: I guess indicating the chapters that have some violence is kind of a spoiler XD
    thanks again!
  • InfraGreenInfraGreen Posts: 6,470 Member
    edited June 2017
    @amirahqueen: judging from your three linked chapters, it looks like abuse in the home is an ongoing theme. Maybe make it clear on the story's home page? And warn on individual chapters that go beyond that.

    Sometimes a content warning will vaguely spoil something but honestly, I think it's worth it for reader comfort.

    (It's kind of reminded me to update my own warnings. :p)
    A thousand bared teeth, a thousand bowed heads

    outrun / blog / tunglr
  • cecerose0208cecerose0208 Posts: 1,521 Member
    InfraGreen wrote: »
    @amirahqueen: judging from your three linked chapters, it looks like abuse in the home is an ongoing theme. Maybe make it clear on the story's home page? And warn on individual chapters that go beyond that.

    Sometimes a content warning will vaguely spoil something but honestly, I think it's worth it for reader comfort.

    (It's kind of reminded me to update my own warnings. :p)

    I agree that a combo warning would make sense for this story. Something on the home page that warns for overall story themes. Then on those specific chapters, a quick warning at the top would be good.

    @amirahqueen If you're worried about spoilers, try to keep the warnings general. You can say domestic abuse instead of getting specific on if it's physical or not. However, I find that for readers who might be triggered, it's better to be more specific on what they may want to avoid. For your other readers, since it's coming right before the actual chapter, the spoiler concern is lessened imo.
  • amy_queenamy_queen Posts: 65 Member
    InfraGreen wrote: »
    @amirahqueen: judging from your three linked chapters, it looks like abuse in the home is an ongoing theme. Maybe make it clear on the story's home page? And warn on individual chapters that go beyond that.

    Sometimes a content warning will vaguely spoil something but honestly, I think it's worth it for reader comfort.

    (It's kind of reminded me to update my own warnings. :p)

    Thanks for the feedback, I'll take your and @cecerose0208's advice and edit my main page as well as include a small note at the beginning of the respective chapters~ In retrospect I guess an informative warning is more important than any potential spoilers; as you've mentioned, readers probably won't be as concerned with the latter :)
    Thanks again, I appreciate it!
  • cecerose0208cecerose0208 Posts: 1,521 Member
    @amirahqueen Any time! Thanks for using the feedback thread. :)
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    for my Swanson story I'm writing a political speech and I need feedback
    |It been about almost 30 years since Windenburg had a leader who cared for 'ONE for ALL and ALL for ONE!' since the last one died in prison about 13yrs. Since the needs of the many outweigh the needs of a few. If you vote for me everyone will have a home no matter how poor or the colour of their skin. I will make sure that police, judges, business owners receive the lessons of Compassion, Courage, Respect, Charity and Honesty that knights were once taught to follow."

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  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 22,855 Member
    @MadameLee What specific feedback would you like? Are there specific things you're wondering about with this speech? And what are you hoping to...
    a) reveal about the character giving the speech
    b) reveal about those listening to the speech
    c) show about the political climate
    d) and how does this tie in with the overall plot?

    What I like about it its tone of earnestness, rhetoric, and all the cliches! :) That's an effective mix for a political speech in a story.
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Dragon Name: Hywicoes | House: Ravenclaw | Wand: Dogwood, Unicorn hair 11 ¼" , Suprisingly Swishy
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    CathyTea wrote: »
    @MadameLee What specific feedback would you like? Are there specific things you're wondering about with this speech? And what are you hoping to...
    a) reveal about the character giving the speech
    b) reveal about those listening to the speech
    c) show about the political climate
    d) and how does this tie in with the overall plot?

    What I like about it its tone of earnestness, rhetoric, and all the cliches! :) That's an effective mix for a political speech in a story.

    I don't have a speech for the rival politician.. all I know is THAT speech something about the status quo and that the people who are living below the poverty line are lazy and judges,etc don't need to use the C.C.R.C.H for POCs since they're criminals,etc.

    but mostly a&b (and d) it's the speech that letting Selene win the election
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  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    testing
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  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    Juliet been dealing with the guilt of giving up one of her children and the way she copes with that is by drinking. The same thing that her Mom did when the mom, Elizabeth had divorced Juliet's father.
    Romeo (the Dad of the children and son-in-law of Elizabeth) is tired of dealing with Juliet's drunk antics that he throws her - Juliet in a jail just to get her to sober up. what do you guys think about that?
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  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 27,777 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    Juliet been dealing with the guilt of giving up one of her children and the way she copes with that is by drinking. The same thing that her Mom did when the mom, Elizabeth had divorced Juliet's father.
    Romeo (the Dad of the children and son-in-law of Elizabeth) is tired of dealing with Juliet's drunk antics that he throws her - Juliet in a jail just to get her to sober up. what do you guys think about that?

    can i answer your question with one of my own?

    it sounds like juliet is dealing with her problems with self abuse. why doesn't she go to therapy?
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    Juliet been dealing with the guilt of giving up one of her children and the way she copes with that is by drinking. The same thing that her Mom did when the mom, Elizabeth had divorced Juliet's father.
    Romeo (the Dad of the children and son-in-law of Elizabeth) is tired of dealing with Juliet's drunk antics that he throws her - Juliet in a jail just to get her to sober up. what do you guys think about that?

    can i answer your question with one of my own?

    it sounds like juliet is dealing with her problems with self abuse. why doesn't she go to therapy?

    She tried therapy (several times) but everytime she thought of the child she gave up she turned back to drink. Since it's basically was a closed adoption (not that the other family gave her their last name).
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  • InfraGreenInfraGreen Posts: 6,470 Member
    edited June 2017
    Would anyone be willing to proofread an upcoming No Stars over Uptown Chapter before Wednesday? It deals with some absolutely horrific subject matter and I feel like I've gone too far...I guess it's character growth for me if I can say that now?

    Anyways I do want one more proofreader. Doesn't matter if you read or not. Disgust is universal. :p


    EDIT: okay more Uptown readers than I thought would ended up volunteering. But if you were considering, I still appreciate the thought. <3
    Post edited by InfraGreen on
    A thousand bared teeth, a thousand bowed heads

    outrun / blog / tunglr
  • AudreyFldAudreyFld Posts: 6,514 Member
    InfraGreen wrote: »
    Would anyone be willing to proofread an upcoming No Stars over Uptown Chapter before Wednesday? It deals with some absolutely horrific subject matter and I feel like I've gone too far...I guess it's character growth for me if I can say that now?

    Anyways I do want one more proofreader. Doesn't matter if you read or not. Disgust is universal. :p


    EDIT: okay more Uptown readers than I thought would ended up volunteering. But if you were considering, I still appreciate the thought. <3

    Now I'm nervous for that chapter!
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    what could be the possibility of a future generation being "spoiled cruel, cold-hearted" person if most of their previous generations have been (mostly) good?

    Oh and I need some ideas for Gen 7 but I need to be PMed directly because of rules
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  • pronteruspronterus Posts: 2,166 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    what could be the possibility of a future generation being "spoiled cruel, cold-hearted" person if most of their previous generations have been (mostly) good?

    Oh and I need some ideas for Gen 7 but I need to be PMed directly because of rules

    In my opinion, that future generation could probably have gotten fed up with the family's values of being good and decided to be rebellious. That person's parents could also be overbearing and have tried hard to shelter their child from the outside world or something. I'd think something along those lines.
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    pronterus wrote: »
    MadameLee wrote: »
    what could be the possibility of a future generation being "spoiled cruel, cold-hearted" person if most of their previous generations have been (mostly) good?

    Oh and I need some ideas for Gen 7 but I need to be PMed directly because of rules

    In my opinion, that future generation could probably have gotten fed up with the family's values of being good and decided to be rebellious. That person's parents could also be overbearing and have tried hard to shelter their child from the outside world or something. I'd think something along those lines.

    Gen 8's various ancestors mostly on the dads' sides been evil/mean
    ie, the 5th great grandparent (ie Darcy Grant) was evil as is the 4th great-great grandma (Kerry Bjersgen)and great-grandpa (Marco Mussell).
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  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    edited July 2017
    what could bullying be like for someone who initials spell HAMS
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  • AudreyFldAudreyFld Posts: 6,514 Member
    Piggy for sure. Piglet maybe. Oink oink! I am thinking juvenile- like 8-13 years old bullying.
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    AudreyFld wrote: »
    Piggy for sure. Piglet maybe. Oink oink! I am thinking juvenile- like 8-13 years old bullying.

    maybe some "Miss Piggy" since the family IS rich... but the characters are like around 8 at the moment
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  • AudreyFldAudreyFld Posts: 6,514 Member
    Is it a girl? Then definitely Miss Piggy and 'do you like frogs' referencing Kermit the frog and Sesame Street. And my other one, Oink oink and snorting.
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    edited July 2017
    AudreyFld wrote: »
    Is it a girl? Then definitely Miss Piggy and 'do you like frogs' referencing Kermit the frog and Sesame Street. And my other one, Oink oink and snorting.

    yeah.. that's makes me thing of a interesting interlude-song chapter for Gen 7. It's her twin that the heiress
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  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,925 Member
    even though JGO is a good person can she be bad for a little while and turn good again? I need a reason for her to be "away" from her twin for a bit when they're teens. Sorry I can't word my question right
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  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 22,855 Member
    MadameLee wrote: »
    even though JGO is a good person can she be bad for a little while and turn good again? I need a reason for her to be "away" from her twin for a bit when they're teens. Sorry I can't word my question right

    Sure! There's no such thing as "all good" and "all bad", so people can be both, even when they tend to be one, more than another.

    There doesn't even really have to be much of a reason for it... for example, I've got a friend who's usually really kind and supportive, and then every now and then, she'll lash out with mean gossip and really enjoy it. Maybe it's triggered when she feels stressed, and maybe when she's bored.
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Dragon Name: Hywicoes | House: Ravenclaw | Wand: Dogwood, Unicorn hair 11 ¼" , Suprisingly Swishy
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