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The Kindness Bench for SimLit Writers - For All Games!

Comments

  • RipuAncestorRipuAncestor Posts: 2,144 Member
    @MadameLee Lots of love and strength for you and everyone whose lives have been touched by Cider. It's hard losing someone close to you. All the best. :heart:

    @IvoryButterfly I'm glad you're feeling better. All the best. :heart:
    doublebannerpic.jpg?w=676
    My Sims stories:
    The Fey of Life - fairytales in life are few and far between (Forum thread HERE)
    The Chrysanthemum Tango - a story about life, death, magic, and how to be a good landlady (Forum thread HERE)
    Forget-Me-Not - some things just refuse to stay buried; an Ambrosia Challenge story (Forum thread HERE)
  • MadameLeeMadameLee Posts: 31,072 Member
    edited August 19
    thank you everyone. I just want to get another dog but that's not going to happen. Since I can't move out ...I don't have a job, or anything. Even if we could get another dog where would they sleep my bedroom a mess. Until we got Cider when I was 14 the only dogs my sister and I interacted with was my Aunt M's dog my Aunt L's dog. our neighbour J's dog-this one before (s)he(?) was put down (s)he was inside my parents' home when J was in hospital. So I was very close to Cider since she been in my life since October 2004
    kikWQMd.jpg
  • sweetnightingalesweetnightingale Posts: 2,076 Member
    @IvoryButterfly - I'm glad you are feeling better. It's no fun to be sick.

    Your banner is awesome!
    36314395402_b6f8316264_z.jpg]
    Simming With Sweet Nightingale. Short stories, pen pal letters, and longer works.
  • IvoryButterflyIvoryButterfly Posts: 1,170 Member
    @IvoryButterfly I'm so sorry you've not been feeling well but I'm glad you're starting to feel better now. Mann I've just been admiring your new banner. Looks so inviting.
    @IvoryButterfly I'm glad you're feeling better. All the best. :heart:

    @IvoryButterfly - I'm glad you are feeling better. It's no fun to be sick.

    Your banner is awesome!

    @simscognito congratulations on the new glasses well, seeing colour is a thing I know many take for granted and it's so wonderful to know you're enjoying all the colours mother nature has to offer up.

    THANK YOU all so much for the <3 's and happiness. I'm also glad my slight artist skills for basic banner making are liked :D
    mbytI0Z.png
    The Universe & I have agreed to disagree with each other!
  • emorrillemorrill Posts: 5,728 Member
    edited August 22
    **Sits on the bench**

    Hello fellow SimLit writers. :)

    So, I was worrying about something (I kinda do since I have this wretched anxiety that I've been cursed to live with forever. :confounded: ), but...say you have lots of friends on here/your blog, that know you pretty well; some even might look up to you, or esteem you as a good and wonderful person. And you are.

    Then you write stuff in your stories that is the complete opposite of your own personality and beliefs and...you fear your friends might be reading it like: :flushed: "Say what now?" "Oh wow..." "Never knew she had that in her..." (<--someone recently said that one to me actually) kind of thoughts. And you also feel that it might change their perception of you. :( Like you're not the person they thought you were.

    Yeeeah that's kind of the boat I'm in right now. Seriously, am I worrying too much??? :neutral:

    I mean, I'm a writer. I have many various different characters, with different personalities, and I gotta get into character when I'm writing about their life and actions. That's what makes a story realistic, I mean, everything can't always be sunshine and rainbows! I figure people should know it doesn't mean I would do or believe the same things personally, but...you never can tell what people think anymore. *sigh*
    Am I the only one that worries about this kind of thing? Or have some of you too?

    Please help ease my anxiety my fellow authors. <3 And I'm sorry if this sounds like something silly to worry about. Thanks.
    ql.jpg
    *Celebrating 30 years of QL!*
  • simscognitosimscognito Posts: 16,256 Member
    emorrill wrote: »
    **Sits on the bench**

    Hello fellow SimLit writers. :)

    So, I was worrying about something (I kinda do since I have this wretched anxiety that I've been cursed to live with forever. :confounded: ), but...say you have lots of friends on here/your blog, that know you pretty well; some even might look up to you, or esteem you as a good and wonderful person. And you are.

    Then you write stuff in your stories that is the complete opposite of your own personality and beliefs and...you fear your friends might be reading it like: :flushed: "Say what now?" "Oh wow..." "Never knew she had that in her..." (<--someone recently said that one to me actually) kind of thoughts. And you also feel that it might change their perception of you. :( Like you're not the person they thought you were.

    Yeeeah that's kind of the boat I'm in right now. Seriously, am I worrying too much??? :neutral:

    I mean, I'm a writer. I have many various different characters, with different personalities, and I gotta get into character when I'm writing about their life and actions. That's what makes a story realistic, I mean, everything can't always be sunshine and rainbows! I figure people should know it doesn't mean I would do or believe the same things personally, but...you never can tell what people think anymore. *sigh*
    Am I the only one that worries about this kind of thing? Or have some of you too?

    Please help ease my anxiety my fellow authors. <3 And I'm sorry if this sounds like something silly to worry about. Thanks.

    @emorrill hey, it's not silly. These are your feelings and they are valid.
    I'm sorry someone said that to you. As readers we should be able to understand the difference between characters, story and author.
    I think it's great that you're exploring different characters and viewpoints even if they're so different to your own.
    I haven't personally experienced this type of thing but I have experienced readers getting angry when a plot didn't go the way they wanted. I think readers can sometimes forget that it's just a story. :joy:
  • SourochaSourocha Posts: 1,452 Member
    emorrill wrote: »
    **Sits on the bench**

    Hello fellow SimLit writers. :)

    So, I was worrying about something (I kinda do since I have this wretched anxiety that I've been cursed to live with forever. :confounded: ), but...say you have lots of friends on here/your blog, that know you pretty well; some even might look up to you, or esteem you as a good and wonderful person. And you are.

    Then you write stuff in your stories that is the complete opposite of your own personality and beliefs and...you fear your friends might be reading it like: :flushed: "Say what now?" "Oh wow..." "Never knew she had that in her..." (<--someone recently said that one to me actually) kind of thoughts. And you also feel that it might change their perception of you. :( Like you're not the person they thought you were.

    Yeeeah that's kind of the boat I'm in right now. Seriously, am I worrying too much??? :neutral:

    I mean, I'm a writer. I have many various different characters, with different personalities, and I gotta get into character when I'm writing about their life and actions. That's what makes a story realistic, I mean, everything can't always be sunshine and rainbows! I figure people should know it doesn't mean I would do or believe the same things personally, but...you never can tell what people think anymore. *sigh*
    Am I the only one that worries about this kind of thing? Or have some of you too?

    Please help ease my anxiety my fellow authors. <3 And I'm sorry if this sounds like something silly to worry about. Thanks.

    @emorrill I second what has been said, it's not silly, it's your feelings! :blush:

    Also agree that it's important for readers to compreehend that what the writer is writing about, and the person they are, are a complete diferent thing.I mean, I don't think people that write horror are sociopaths, or people that write romance have a perfect romantic life you get my point :D .I think they said what they said without much thought, not realizing it could have that interperation, still, I'm sorry you got that coment.

    If you wrote every character with same belief pattern, and action, as yours, in my opinion, that would get old fast, since, in real life, people don't usually agree on everything both morally and in other aspects of life, as you mentioned.

    I can definetly relate, to some extend, to such feeling. I write some rather errr controversial themes, but, everytime some character with a real nasty opinion spoke, I would always make clear, in the beginning of the chapter, that their opions are theirs only, and don't represent the writer's in any case. ;) Readers should know that by default, but, it still doens't hurt to remember them that.And, if someone were to get angry because of such opinion, you are covered. B) From the way I see, that is.

  • emorrillemorrill Posts: 5,728 Member
    @simscognito
    @emorrill hey, it's not silly. These are your feelings and they are valid.
    ^Aww, thank you. <3
    And also for your comment. I can't believe readers get angry when a plot turns out differently than they expected. :unamused: Sorry you've had those kind of comments thrown out at ya. :(
    It's an understandable reaction sure, but...you don't express that to the writer. Such a lack of common courtesy these days. They should accept the fact that it's just a story, like you said ;) , and hope that they'll enjoy the rest of it. 👍

    @Sourocha Thank you for your kind words too. <3
    If you wrote every character with same belief pattern, and action, as yours, in my opinion, that would get old fast, since, in real life, people don't usually agree on everything both morally and in other aspects of life, as you mentioned.
    ^Exactly! :star: I very much like to go for realism in my stories; hoping to appeal to many different audiences.
    And I don't want my readers to get bored with my stories. Nor do I want them to go into a new story of mine thinking, "Oh boy the plot and characters are gonna be just like the last 3..." You know? :lol:
    ...everytime some character with a real nasty opinion spoke, I would always make clear, in the beginning of the chapter, that their opinions are theirs only, and don't represent the writer's in any case. ;)
    ^Funny you should mention that because I felt the need to say something similar at the start of one of my recent stories. :p (Actually I've picked it up again to finish it because I never did...life happened...)
    Gotta love how easily offended (and critical) everyone gets these days...I'm in awe how many writers on here and on blogs have to put out disclaimers at the beginning of their chapters now. I've even felt the need to do it too because I don't want someone getting offended or triggered and lash out at me about it. (I don't do well with confrontations. :flushed: ) But yeah, y'all understand what I'm talking about. ;)

    I will say this: Writing out a character who has a complete opposite personality and beliefs as myself, has helped me to grow as a writer and I find that sometimes I write out their character/scenes better than the other characters whose personalities & beliefs are similar to mine. :)
    Funny how that works...

    But anyway,

    Thank you both. Your words have definitely put my mind at ease. <3
    ql.jpg
    *Celebrating 30 years of QL!*
  • IvoryButterflyIvoryButterfly Posts: 1,170 Member
    emorrill wrote: »
    **Sits on the bench**

    Hello fellow SimLit writers. :)

    So, I was worrying about something (I kinda do since I have this wretched anxiety that I've been cursed to live with forever. :confounded: ), but...say you have lots of friends on here/your blog, that know you pretty well; some even might look up to you, or esteem you as a good and wonderful person. And you are.

    Then you write stuff in your stories that is the complete opposite of your own personality and beliefs and...you fear your friends might be reading it like: :flushed: "Say what now?" "Oh wow..." "Never knew she had that in her..." (<--someone recently said that one to me actually) kind of thoughts. And you also feel that it might change their perception of you. :( Like you're not the person they thought you were.

    Yeeeah that's kind of the boat I'm in right now. Seriously, am I worrying too much??? :neutral:

    I mean, I'm a writer. I have many various different characters, with different personalities, and I gotta get into character when I'm writing about their life and actions. That's what makes a story realistic, I mean, everything can't always be sunshine and rainbows! I figure people should know it doesn't mean I would do or believe the same things personally, but...you never can tell what people think anymore. *sigh*
    Am I the only one that worries about this kind of thing? Or have some of you too?

    Please help ease my anxiety my fellow authors. <3 And I'm sorry if this sounds like something silly to worry about. Thanks.

    NOOOOO, don't feel bad. You summed it up perfectly with 'I'm a writer.' It's what we do, and also, YES, you're so right, not everything can be sunshine and rainbows, as much as we'd like it to be.

    I've a mug I bought ages ago, because of one of my stories that isn't on a blog I share; I hope you get a giggle out of it, and it helps shed some light on not taking yourself or other comments TOO seriously, unless they're being nice, soak up those like a dry sponge!

    https://www.amazon.com/Attention-Browsing-History-Writer-Serial/dp/B06XHZ8NG5
    (Seriously if ppl took my writing seriously I'd be in goal ROFL)
    mbytI0Z.png
    The Universe & I have agreed to disagree with each other!
  • AdamsEve1231AdamsEve1231 Posts: 5,867 Member
    *HUGS* and my deepest condolences to @AdamsEve1231 and @MadameLee, losing anybody human or fur-baby is never easy. Hopefully soon more happiness will come to you if it hasn't already.

    Goodness, defiantly been away too long :'(

    Sadly the reason is my health really gave me a good kick in the teeth and I wasn't able to do much over the past few months other than sit on the couch and read or watch TV, it got very boring very fast.
    After seeing a new Dr who took me off my medication and changed my diet (no starch), things are looking up finally and I'm not in as much pain as I have been.

    Thankfully this meant that my blog has now finally been updated to look like I've always wanted it to look! Like a normal blog that other storytellers have and a few bells and whistles.
    Big thanks to a Simmer friend of mine (can't find her tag to tag her).

    Hoping I can get the next chapter out sooner rather than later :)

    Thank you, @IvoryButterfly. I hope your health improves dramatically so you can feel good and accomplish all the things you want.
  • AdamsEve1231AdamsEve1231 Posts: 5,867 Member
    edited August 23
    emorrill wrote: »
    **Sits on the bench**

    Hello fellow SimLit writers. :)

    So, I was worrying about something (I kinda do since I have this wretched anxiety that I've been cursed to live with forever. :confounded: ), but...say you have lots of friends on here/your blog, that know you pretty well; some even might look up to you, or esteem you as a good and wonderful person. And you are.

    Then you write stuff in your stories that is the complete opposite of your own personality and beliefs and...you fear your friends might be reading it like: :flushed: "Say what now?" "Oh wow..." "Never knew she had that in her..." (<--someone recently said that one to me actually) kind of thoughts. And you also feel that it might change their perception of you. :( Like you're not the person they thought you were.

    Yeeeah that's kind of the boat I'm in right now. Seriously, am I worrying too much??? :neutral:

    I mean, I'm a writer. I have many various different characters, with different personalities, and I gotta get into character when I'm writing about their life and actions. That's what makes a story realistic, I mean, everything can't always be sunshine and rainbows! I figure people should know it doesn't mean I would do or believe the same things personally, but...you never can tell what people think anymore. *sigh*
    Am I the only one that worries about this kind of thing? Or have some of you too?

    Please help ease my anxiety my fellow authors. <3 And I'm sorry if this sounds like something silly to worry about. Thanks.

    @emorrill It's not silly to feel this way. I'm sorry other writers are giving you grief. Hopefully everyone knows these are just stories at the end of the day.

    I do this all the time. Write about beliefs I don't hold, values or lack thereof that are not my own, actions I wouldn't take, etc. I get pretty dark sometimes. Heh... :#

    Part of writing is exploration, getting to know other characters and worldviews. I think it helps make us, the writers, more sympathetic and open minded, and also stretches us and helps us grow. If you wrote characters exactly like you, everyone would be the same and it would be boring.

    Sometimes I wonder if I've lost readers because of X, Y, or Z and then I try to remind myself my stories aren't for everyone and maybe it's ok if I lose a reader or two. You just keep writing your stories, hold your head high, and remember it's ok to write things that are different from who you are personally. It's what makes all of us (and our characters) unique
  • sweetnightingalesweetnightingale Posts: 2,076 Member
    @emorrill - I'm going to add my two cents' worth here, as I know EXACTLY how you are feeling right now.

    First of all, your feelings are very valid and not silly at all. It's normal as a writer to be concerned about what readers might think. When you pursue creative outlets and put them out there for others to see, you're sticking your neck out there. When finding a supportive community, it's mostly good, but sadly, there's some bad, even nastiness, that you may encounter.

    Anyway, I had an instance some years back that totally threw me. One of my characters said something that a reader got highly offended over, then took it out on me personally. There were some other issues, but this was the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back. Anyway, it turned into a huge argument, and I ended up leaving that particular community. It was a lesson learned, and a hard one. I now put content warnings at the beginning of chapters that call for it, even if it's something slight that most people might just overlook. I also note, when needed, that viewpoints and beliefs of characters may differ from the author's beliefs and viewpoints. I figure by doing that, it's up to them to decide if they want to read it; they've been warned. This way, if I find myself in a situation like that again, I will politely point out the warning and remind them it was their choice to read it.

    The bottom line is it's your story, so don't let anyone dictate to you how it should be written. if a person can't separate story and character from an author's personal beliefs, they aren't worth the time of day. You will find other more supportive readers to replace that negativity and toxicity.

    I'm so sorry you went through that. And I'm sorry if this sounds blunt. :) Sometimes I can be that way. You just keep doing what you're doing and try not to worry about the nay-sayers. Keep calm and write on. :)
    36314395402_b6f8316264_z.jpg]
    Simming With Sweet Nightingale. Short stories, pen pal letters, and longer works.
  • IvoryButterflyIvoryButterfly Posts: 1,170 Member
    *Sits in a lounge chair, curling up her legs under her, purses her lips for a moment and takes a deep breath*

    Ok... I know I don't HAVE to explain myself to anyone, but I feel in order to be... um... understood, I'd like to, I'll keep it short, promise.

    Most of my life I've been in pain, Drs can't explain it, it's beyond Fibromyalgia and not Chrones Disease.
    For years I was considered to be lying until I came across my most recent Dr who has diagnosed me with what he is calling a, Hyper-Sensitive Nervous System.
    My nervous system that controls what my skin feels, is like a frayed wire, some days it works fine and I feel, well, I guess like most people do, clothing is clothing, a breeze is refreshing and soft embracing cuddles are awesome.
    Other days, the wiring isn't working so fine... clothing feels scratchy and irritating, a breeze stings like an icy southern wind and soft embracing cuddles hurt too much and make me cry.

    I've known most of you for a long time, and some are new.
    The support and friendship here has been so wonderful, it's nice to come back after being away and feel like I've never left, and that my writing and appreciated, even liked by some of you. (It's cool if not everyone likes my stuff, everyone has their own taste).
    ALL of your stories keep my days filled when I can barely move to click my mouse to get to the next page, I'm sorry I've not commented much, it's hard to type when your very finger tips ache.

    My thanks to you all, and I hope this kinda help explain why I disappear without warning from time to time.
    I'm working on my blog right now, adding another short story page for a Legacy Story I just found and really want to work on for a bit of extra expansion with my writing.
    mbytI0Z.png
    The Universe & I have agreed to disagree with each other!
  • AdamsEve1231AdamsEve1231 Posts: 5,867 Member
    *Sits in a lounge chair, curling up her legs under her, purses her lips for a moment and takes a deep breath*

    Ok... I know I don't HAVE to explain myself to anyone, but I feel in order to be... um... understood, I'd like to, I'll keep it short, promise.

    Most of my life I've been in pain, Drs can't explain it, it's beyond Fibromyalgia and not Chrones Disease.
    For years I was considered to be lying until I came across my most recent Dr who has diagnosed me with what he is calling a, Hyper-Sensitive Nervous System.
    My nervous system that controls what my skin feels, is like a frayed wire, some days it works fine and I feel, well, I guess like most people do, clothing is clothing, a breeze is refreshing and soft embracing cuddles are awesome.
    Other days, the wiring isn't working so fine... clothing feels scratchy and irritating, a breeze stings like an icy southern wind and soft embracing cuddles hurt too much and make me cry.

    I've known most of you for a long time, and some are new.
    The support and friendship here has been so wonderful, it's nice to come back after being away and feel like I've never left, and that my writing and appreciated, even liked by some of you. (It's cool if not everyone likes my stuff, everyone has their own taste).
    ALL of your stories keep my days filled when I can barely move to click my mouse to get to the next page, I'm sorry I've not commented much, it's hard to type when your very finger tips ache.

    My thanks to you all, and I hope this kinda help explain why I disappear without warning from time to time.
    I'm working on my blog right now, adding another short story page for a Legacy Story I just found and really want to work on for a bit of extra expansion with my writing.

    Thank you for sharing, @IvoryButterfly. I send peaceful relaxing thoughts your way! Take care of yourself.
  • CathyTeaCathyTea Posts: 22,660 Member
    *Sits in a lounge chair, curling up her legs under her, purses her lips for a moment and takes a deep breath*

    Ok... I know I don't HAVE to explain myself to anyone, but I feel in order to be... um... understood, I'd like to, I'll keep it short, promise.

    Most of my life I've been in pain, Drs can't explain it, it's beyond Fibromyalgia and not Chrones Disease.
    For years I was considered to be lying until I came across my most recent Dr who has diagnosed me with what he is calling a, Hyper-Sensitive Nervous System.
    My nervous system that controls what my skin feels, is like a frayed wire, some days it works fine and I feel, well, I guess like most people do, clothing is clothing, a breeze is refreshing and soft embracing cuddles are awesome.
    Other days, the wiring isn't working so fine... clothing feels scratchy and irritating, a breeze stings like an icy southern wind and soft embracing cuddles hurt too much and make me cry.

    I've known most of you for a long time, and some are new.
    The support and friendship here has been so wonderful, it's nice to come back after being away and feel like I've never left, and that my writing and appreciated, even liked by some of you. (It's cool if not everyone likes my stuff, everyone has their own taste).
    ALL of your stories keep my days filled when I can barely move to click my mouse to get to the next page, I'm sorry I've not commented much, it's hard to type when your very finger tips ache.

    My thanks to you all, and I hope this kinda help explain why I disappear without warning from time to time.
    I'm working on my blog right now, adding another short story page for a Legacy Story I just found and really want to work on for a bit of extra expansion with my writing.

    Thanks so much for sharing this, Ivory. I have challenges with sensory processing, too. I know what you mean about clothing being unbearably scratchy (kinda ignoring the sensations on the back of my neck right now, as I'm wearing a new t-shirt I'm not yet used to), and touch can be tricky for me (it hurts to be tickled).

    I don't experience a lot of pain, so I don't know what that's like. One of the blogs I follow is by an autistic artist with fibromyalgia and other sensory processing issues. She writes about many of the challenges of chronic debilitating pain.

    How helpful that you've a doctor who doesn't dismiss your experience. To be not believed and accepted when you're experiencing something so challenging feels insulting and cruel, at least that's how I experience it.

    I always smile when I see you've been reading my posts. Feels like a smiling glance of acknowledgement from a friend.

    And I'm so happy you feel welcomed back by the community as if you'd never been away. That's the kind of community I need, since I sometimes need to withdraw or follow other interests, but I never want to feel like I'm not still part of this community. I always want to come back as if I hadn't stepped away.

    Thank you for being here and for being an essential part of what makes this community work!
    Cathy Tea's SimLit Anthology

    Dragon Name: Hywicoes | House: Ravenclaw | Wand: Dogwood, Unicorn hair 11 ¼" , Suprisingly Swishy
  • simscognitosimscognito Posts: 16,256 Member
    *Sits in a lounge chair, curling up her legs under her, purses her lips for a moment and takes a deep breath*

    Ok... I know I don't HAVE to explain myself to anyone, but I feel in order to be... um... understood, I'd like to, I'll keep it short, promise.

    Most of my life I've been in pain, Drs can't explain it, it's beyond Fibromyalgia and not Chrones Disease.
    For years I was considered to be lying until I came across my most recent Dr who has diagnosed me with what he is calling a, Hyper-Sensitive Nervous System.
    My nervous system that controls what my skin feels, is like a frayed wire, some days it works fine and I feel, well, I guess like most people do, clothing is clothing, a breeze is refreshing and soft embracing cuddles are awesome.
    Other days, the wiring isn't working so fine... clothing feels scratchy and irritating, a breeze stings like an icy southern wind and soft embracing cuddles hurt too much and make me cry.

    I've known most of you for a long time, and some are new.
    The support and friendship here has been so wonderful, it's nice to come back after being away and feel like I've never left, and that my writing and appreciated, even liked by some of you. (It's cool if not everyone likes my stuff, everyone has their own taste).
    ALL of your stories keep my days filled when I can barely move to click my mouse to get to the next page, I'm sorry I've not commented much, it's hard to type when your very finger tips ache.

    My thanks to you all, and I hope this kinda help explain why I disappear without warning from time to time.
    I'm working on my blog right now, adding another short story page for a Legacy Story I just found and really want to work on for a bit of extra expansion with my writing.

    @IvoryButterfly I'm sorry you're in pain. That really plum. And I'm sorry it's taken so long to find out what's wrong.
    I was in your shoes with chronic pain that no one understood. Then at the end of last year they gave me some explanations... I think. I'm not absolutely sure what they diagnosed me with exactly. I think it was a combination of hormone issues and sensory processing problems.

    You're absolutely allowed to take breaks from here and no, you don't have to apologise for doing so, or explain yourself. Your health and happiness comes first.

    I'm also glad you find comfort in this community too. It's always a pleasure to have you around. :)
  • emorrillemorrill Posts: 5,728 Member
    Finally getting some replies in to your sweet replies. <3 I've been a busy bee the past 2 days...

    @Ironbutterfly Oh my gosh that mug is awesome! :lol: I need it! Thank you for your comforting words. <3

    Aww, I just read your recent post and how hard and frustrating that must be for you. :cry: But I gotta say honey, my heart goes out to you because I understand! <3 {{{{Hugs}}}}
    Not in a personal way, but through watching my husband deal with his chronic illness. He was feeling horribly sick for a good YEAR until a dermatologist, out of all medical professionals, finally found the source to his problem. That was a hard year, because the not knowing was killing us, but also because he too was told by doctors that "perhaps it's all in your head" because EVERY test they did on him came back normal. :disappointed: And he was like, "Bull carp! I feel awful, I can hardly get up because this nausea won't ever go away, and my bones hurt, so this is NOT all in my head!"
    One day I noticed these red spots on his skin, that I had noticed 2 years earlier and we planned on getting them looked at, but forgot. I told him it was probably time to finally get them looked at. Then I said, "Wouldn't it be funny if the biopsy came back telling us what's wrong with you?" :lol: I mean we were seriously laughing...because at that point it felt like all hope was lost in finding out what was wrong with him. :cry:

    Sure enough, the biopsy came back.......
    With such an interesting diagnosis that the dermatologist had to pull out his 4 inch thick medical book to look it up so he could provide my hubby with some information about it. :lol:
    He has what they call Mastocytosis. It's a rare autoimmune disorder where the body can't stop producing mast cells so they overtake the bones, the marrow, internal organs, and the person is pretty much allergic to themselves. :( And there's all sorts of triggers out there that can give him a flare up. He's on more pills than he can count. :confounded: Right now it's being controlled and we are so thankful. (As per that article I linked there he has the "Indolent Systemic Mastocytosis" - and it is my constant prayer that he never gets to "Aggressive Systemic Mastocytosis" until he's like old and frail because this thing cannot be cured and I want him to live a long life with me and our daughter.) <3

    My thoughts and prayers go out to you and I hope they can provide you with some treatments that are effective and helpful. {{{Hugs}}}


    @AdamsEve1231 Thank you. <3
    Part of writing is exploration, getting to know other characters and worldviews. I think it helps make us, the writers, more sympathetic and open minded, and also stretches us and helps us grow. If you wrote characters exactly like you, everyone would be the same and it would be boring.
    ^Yes and yes! :star: I've noticed it's had an affect on me for the better; not just in improving my writing skills, but especially with being more sympathetic and understanding to others and not be so quick to judge. <3

    And yes I've also been reminding myself that my stories will not be for everyone and that's OK. ;) (Chillax emorrill! :lol: )


    @sweetnightingale Thank you. <3
    When you pursue creative outlets and put them out there for others to see, you're sticking your neck out there.
    ^This is very true and I hadn't thought about that...

    I read your experience there and I was like: :open_mouth: I almost felt like crying! :cry: I'm so sorry that person acted that way towards you and your character! (For me if someone attacks certain characters of mine I can get pretty sad and defensive because they are almost like my babies. :p ) People in this world sometimes......
    ...I also note, when needed, that viewpoints and beliefs of characters may differ from the author's beliefs and viewpoints. I figure by doing that, it's up to them to decide if they want to read it; they've been warned. This way, if I find myself in a situation like that again, I will politely point out the warning and remind them it was their choice to read it.
    ^Indeed! Amen to that! :star:
    The bottom line is it's your story, so don't let anyone dictate to you how it should be written. if a person can't separate story and character from an author's personal beliefs, they aren't worth the time of day. You will find other more supportive readers to replace that negativity and toxicity.
    ^Exactly. Thank you. <3

    You weren't blunt at all. I appreciated every word of it and it provided me comfort. :)



    Thank you again everyone for your kind words and support. <3
    ql.jpg
    *Celebrating 30 years of QL!*
  • simscognitosimscognito Posts: 16,256 Member
    @emorrill I'm so sorry. That sounds like a nasty disorder. I'm glad they've managed to get it under control. Yeah, the assumption that 'it's all in your head' is really annoying.
    I had that thrown at me by doctors for most of my life because every single test kept coming back as normal. It's nice when you finally find someone who believes you.
    I'm too on a reasonable amount of medication, which is helping to keep things in balance.
    I'm so glad you and your husband got to the bottom of the chronic pain. Finding out what's wrong can be a relief.
  • emorrillemorrill Posts: 5,728 Member
    @emorrill I'm so sorry. That sounds like a nasty disorder. I'm glad they've managed to get it under control. Yeah, the assumption that 'it's all in your head' is really annoying.
    I had that thrown at me by doctors for most of my life because every single test kept coming back as normal. It's nice when you finally find someone who believes you.
    I'm too on a reasonable amount of medication, which is helping to keep things in balance.
    I'm so glad you and your husband got to the bottom of the chronic pain. Finding out what's wrong can be a relief.

    Aww, thank you @simscognito <3 {{{{hugs}}}}
    Yes! Finding a doctor who actually validates what you are feeling is such a relief! :star:
    Yup, all my hubby's meds are keeping things in balance for him too. ;)
    I'm glad you're finding answers with what's ailing you and I hope they can provide you with an official diagnosis soon. My prayers will be with you too. <3
    ql.jpg
    *Celebrating 30 years of QL!*
  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 26,141 Member
    emorrill wrote: »
    @emorrill I'm so sorry. That sounds like a nasty disorder. I'm glad they've managed to get it under control. Yeah, the assumption that 'it's all in your head' is really annoying.
    I had that thrown at me by doctors for most of my life because every single test kept coming back as normal. It's nice when you finally find someone who believes you.
    I'm too on a reasonable amount of medication, which is helping to keep things in balance.
    I'm so glad you and your husband got to the bottom of the chronic pain. Finding out what's wrong can be a relief.

    Aww, thank you @simscognito <3 {{{{hugs}}}}
    Yes! Finding a doctor who actually validates what you are feeling is such a relief! :star:
    Yup, all my hubby's meds are keeping things in balance for him too. ;)
    I'm glad you're finding answers with what's ailing you and I hope they can provide you with an official diagnosis soon. My prayers will be with you too. <3

    its all in your head is what drs say when they don't want to admit they can't figure it out. i'm lucky i know whats wrong with me and how to manage it. but mom and dad didn;t know there was anything wrong til after birth.and i like cog had to find just the right dosage.

    i'm epeleptic with hydoscphalous. water on the brain.the second part went away when i became a adult.hang in there. i would have posted sooner but i couldn;t think of anything to say.
  • IvoryButterflyIvoryButterfly Posts: 1,170 Member
    @everyone you're all just, amazingly AMAZING!

    As weird as it sounds, it's very reassuring to know I'm not alone, and I don't mean that lightly.

    @emorrill I love your banner! Quantum leap was an awesome show, I love watching the reruns :)
    its all in your head is what drs say when they don't want to admit they can't figure it out. i'm lucky i know whats wrong with me and how to manage it. but mom and dad didn't know there was anything wrong til after birth.and i like cog had to find just the right dosage.

    i'm epeleptic with hydoscphalous. water on the brain.the second part went away when i became a adult.hang in there. i would have posted sooner but i couldn;t think of anything to say.

    Yeah I was getting pretty sick of being put in the "too hard / she's just lying basket". It's an odd sense of relief, not that anything can be done for me because hubby and I are trying to have a baby and they can't put me on anything that won't upset my body. (We're already having a hard time with me falling pregnant... but that's another long detailed story I'll leave for another time) <3

    Have a beautiful weekend everyone <3

    mbytI0Z.png
    The Universe & I have agreed to disagree with each other!
  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 26,141 Member
    @everyone you're all just, amazingly AMAZING!

    As weird as it sounds, it's very reassuring to know I'm not alone, and I don't mean that lightly.

    @emorrill I love your banner! Quantum leap was an awesome show, I love watching the reruns :)
    its all in your head is what drs say when they don't want to admit they can't figure it out. i'm lucky i know whats wrong with me and how to manage it. but mom and dad didn't know there was anything wrong til after birth.and i like cog had to find just the right dosage.

    i'm epeleptic with hydoscphalous. water on the brain.the second part went away when i became a adult.hang in there. i would have posted sooner but i couldn;t think of anything to say.

    Yeah I was getting pretty sick of being put in the "too hard / she's just lying basket". It's an odd sense of relief, not that anything can be done for me because hubby and I are trying to have a baby and they can't put me on anything that won't upset my body. (We're already having a hard time with me falling pregnant... but that's another long detailed story I'll leave for another time) <3

    Have a beautiful weekend everyone <3

    i work tomorrow. i'm here cause remote controls need beepers so if you drop them someplace you can find them. i never found the one i was looking for but i found one i didn;t know was missing.
  • friendsfan367friendsfan367 Posts: 26,141 Member
    yeah i found the firestick remote. desining women is coming to hulu tomorrow. please look it up if want to know aboutit asking me what its about will just make me feel old. i have a younger brother who already did that. my niece asked how old i was and he told her. jokes on him though hes having one of the bigger birthdays and i will tell my little nieces how old daddy is over and over.
  • emorrillemorrill Posts: 5,728 Member

    its all in your head is what drs say when they don't want to admit they can't figure it out. i'm lucky i know whats wrong with me and how to manage it. but mom and dad didn;t know there was anything wrong til after birth.and i like cog had to find just the right dosage.

    @friendsfan367 ^My gosh that is SO true!!
    Bless your heart. <3 Your conditions aren't easy to live with either, but I'm glad to hear you know what it is and how to manage it.


    @IvoryButterfly
    @emorrill I love your banner! Quantum leap was an awesome show, I love watching the reruns :)
    Thanks. :blush: And indeed! :mrgreen:
    Can you believe it aired 30 years ago this year!? :open_mouth: I wish more than anything I had discovered it in my younger days, but...my parents didn't have cable TV when I was a kid...not even the satellite stuff.
    The ending of that show was a dagger to the heart... :cry: BUT...I wrote a continuing story fanfic of it (Sims style! :grin: ) and if you're interested in checking it out you can read it here: https://emilyssims3stories.wordpress.com/ql-sam-beckett-story/

    It seems like you're feeling better and I'm glad we could provide some comfort to you. <3 Hang in there, you got this! :star: Better days are ahead, I know it. {{{{Hugs}}}}
    ql.jpg
    *Celebrating 30 years of QL!*
  • IvoryButterflyIvoryButterfly Posts: 1,170 Member
    emorrill wrote: »
    @emorrill I love your banner! Quantum leap was an awesome show, I love watching the reruns :)
    Thanks. :blush: And indeed! :mrgreen:
    Can you believe it aired 30 years ago this year!? :open_mouth: I wish more than anything I had discovered it in my younger days, but...my parents didn't have cable TV when I was a kid...not even the satellite stuff.
    The ending of that show was a dagger to the heart... :cry: BUT...I wrote a continuing story fanfic of it (Sims style! :grin: ) and if you're interested in checking it out you can read it here: https://emilyssims3stories.wordpress.com/ql-sam-beckett-story/

    It seems like you're feeling better and I'm glad we could provide some comfort to you. <3 Hang in there, you got this! :star: Better days are ahead, I know it. {{{{Hugs}}}}

    Oh I'm SO following that story, I'll add it to my Reading List. Really 30yrs... Oh goodness!!!

    And yes I am feeling much better, my hands are feeling a bit sore today, but I'm pushing through it and using a lovely new moistener hubby bought me with some cotton gloves on to help. It's a little awkward but I'm making it work :p

    I'm going to be adding a new Story Legacy to my Library section of my Blog, I'm going to be focusing on it when I don;t feel like writing my main story... which at the moment I'm procrastinating on... I just can't seem to feel lit out properly right now and refuse to write anything half plum!!!


    mbytI0Z.png
    The Universe & I have agreed to disagree with each other!
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