Why are so many of you okay with not being able to be good at certain things.

brendhan21

So I have to ask but why are so many of you okay with not being good or able to do certain things. like i mean skill wise why are some of you okay that some people can just do things better then you and or how come you are able to ignore/be happy for people who are just naturally talented at something you are not. how come it does not bother you. do you ever think about it if not you are lucky you have so much more stuff to think about that it is impossible to think about that. unless you have such a busy life you cant think about it idk i just feel like so many of you are so lucky you can handle life.

joseandchocolate

I don't think talent comes naturally, I think if you want something REALLY bad, you most DEFINITELY will get there.

brendhan21

joseandchocolate wrote: »

I don't think talent comes naturally, I think if you want something REALLY bad, you most DEFINITELY will get there.

so are you saying that because you are not good at something it is because you just are not interested in doing it and you did not want it really badly enough.

lauravonawesome

there's a difference between talent and skill: skill can be refined and improved over time, whereas talent is something you're born with; you either have it, or you don't.

i am a good writer, not a great writer: i'm aware that there are much better writers than me out there: so i learn from them. i'm usually that person talking to the author at book signings: even if the book itself isn't something i'm interested in, i want to learn about where the magic happens.

i love drawing but am horrible at it; then there's my husband, who doesn't enjoy it at all, despite being a gifted artist.

skill is not talent: they can coexist, but are not mutually exclusive.

enzopenguin

Honestly, this was a struggle for me. As a kid, i was always praised for being "the smart one", so that when I got to university and was surrounded by smart people I felt incredibly inadequate. I felt that no matter how good at something I got, if i wasn't the best then I was still somehow a failure. But now I'm a happy grown-🐸🐸🐸🐸 adult, so here's the secret:

Being ok with things is a skill. A skill that requires practice and hard work. Ways to practice it:
1) find something else to prioritise. Being the smartest/best at a skill person in the room is ridiculously impractical, but what about being the kindest? the hardest worker? the most thoughtful? It might sound silly, but maybe think of it as choosing to be hufflepuff instead of a ravenclaw. What would Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson do?

2) It's all well and good to say "don't compare yourself to others", but here is how you practice that. We all have a stream of consciousness in our heads, all the time. Start paying attention to what it says when this start to bother you. Interrupt it by standing up for yourself! You're brain will be like, "so and so is better at x without trying", so you interrupt it with, "So?! I'm awesome at y! And I'm better at x than I was yesterday". It might feel super lame at first, but keep doing it. It's a proven method that re-wires your brain away from that other thought. If you're curious, google "negative self-talk".

3) as for handling life, well. If you find yourself struggling with depression (like I did) talking to a therapist is invaluable. Exercise also turned out to be a pretty good way of stopping my mind from dwelling on things. I take medication, to balance the chemicals in my brain. And I practice happiness by doing little things for myself or appreciating little things around me. It works.

MrSpaceman

That's an interesting question I love to ask, but still got no answer.
Always wonder why many people dream about something|have different promlems making their lives harder|want to change something or get any skills, but do really NOTHING.
Ok, nothing comes easy, but if you want something and you want it bad enough, why not to try? I had a couple situations when I thought that I want it so bad, that living without it is way harder than any try to reach it.
And I can't also find out, why many people who want to change themselves, do nohing, but pretend they are another. I mean people, who want to be slim, for example, but choose Photoshop instead of weight loss, but oftenly feel sad that they ain't really slim. Etc. Why don't become? Why just pretending?

Hippie_Simmer

I look at it as, everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. We can't all be good at everything because the world would be a boring place if we were. I admire others' skills and I'm sure others admire mine.