Okay, here are two things that I think would really make throwing parties work better for me, and much less frustrating.
1: Being able to look at/invite people from the whole household. This is especially annoying when it comes to kids, because kids can't throw parties, but then if I want the kid's friends to show up, I have to go the trouble of introducing them to the kid's parents, which is a huge hassle. So, it would be AMAZING if I could just click on a button saying, say, "show (household member)'s contacts", and invite from that list as well. I mean, it makes sense in story too...if you're throwing a party for your kid, you'd be able to, Oh I don't know, ask them who they want to invite?
It would also be super cool if, when getting married to an NPC, we could look at the NPC's contact list once they've been designated as the bride or groom. I mean, just because they're an NPC their parent's don't get invited to the wedding?
2: Social actions to direct Sims you hire for your event. So, if you hire a caterer, you could go up to them, click, and say, "ask/direct to make Garden Salad" (or whatever). Same with mixologist. Hell, I'd actually appreciate this with the maids and repair people as well...being able to direct them towards a certain task.
And, lastly, this is mostly a quibble, but I've noticed that all the household members get the confidant "sucessful host" buff after the party, which kind of makes me wonder why we're asked to designate a host at all. Anyway, just some thoughts.
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3: I would like it if Dinner Parties had a formal dress code instead of party dress or, even better, if we were able to designate a dress code for our parties! So we can choose what the vibe is! Maybe it's just a casual house party, and we just want people showing up in their everyday outfits...maybe it's a fancy dinner party, and a more formal attire is approppriate, maybe it's a dance party and we want people in their party clothes...but it's weird for sims to show up in the same outfit for all these events :-/
4: Since City Living came out, I'd like to be able to hold parties--particularly birthdays--there, which we can't right now. That's probably an oversight.
5: I wish there was more variety in what sims wear at things like costume and black and white parties. Srsly, why does everyone where the same dress and the same 5 costumes? Just put in any black or white dress, and it's be cool if some of the more "historical" outfits were options for costumes, like the von haunt ghost outfits and some things from the vampire pack, that sort of thing.
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It's optional. Untick "prestige event" when you're creating the party.
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