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We care! Supporting Simmers going through hard times.

Comments

  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    Gristolian wrote: »
    I think this is an awesome thread! ;u; I've had severe anxiety and major depression for about three years now. Right now it's been very difficult to find work in my particular field, and it's hard not to take every rejection personally. I use games (like Sims) as an outlet between work. Even though it's difficult to convince myself I need breaks, I usually feel much better after I do.

    Here's hoping all of you stay safe and healthy. Hang in there.

    Hello @Gristolian
    I send hugs to you <3 as you live day day with your anxiety and depression, and its effects on your life. I am sorry that you are having difficulties finding work in your career field. It is hard and can be quite upsetting and disressing to get rejections. Try to remember that the companies are not rejecting you as a person. You are still a very special person, who is loved by your loved ones.In the long run, by not receiving those jobs, you are getting closer to a job that will suit you much better and that you will enjoy doing, and will the most beneficial for you and the company.
    Simming is a great way of taking a break from real life and all the stresses and pressure that the day and our lives are holding. It helps us as we are enduring through health issues as it helps us to focus on other things. It is lots of fun too!
    Sending another hug to you <3

  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    Hmm... I recently moved (A month ago), it was stressful as a lot of moves are. My Mom had an amputation of her foot so she can't really walk properly yet. I've been on a bad schedule and have really only been seeing my family for 2-4 hours a day, which plum for me as that causes a lot of anxiety for me, so I've been trying to fix that. Weather is terrible and I have no shoes for it so I can't even spend my morning with my older brother and/or dad.

    On a lighter note, we are all in the same house now and my mom's infection IS getting better.

    Hello @Zinniavanilla
    Moving home is a very stressful time. It is very tiring too, as it involves both the packing up of items from the old home, then the unpacking in the new home. It is tiring both physically and mentally, with all the working out and planning of the move. I hope that day by day your settling into your new home and local environnrnt progresses well. I send hugs to you <3
    I am so sorry to hear that your mother 's foot needed to be amputated. I hope that the healing process after the surgery goes as smoothly as possible. It is an encouraging sign that her infection is getting better. It is good that you and your family are all together in the same house, and can caringly look after your mother and each other. I hope that you will be able to work out an improved work schedule that will help you to have more time with your family and ease your anxiety.
    Sending a wave to your Mother :) and another hug to you <3
  • emorrillemorrill Posts: 3,523 Member
    This is such a wonderful thread. <3 I'll have to start following it from now on.

    We all have our own battles we're fighting. Some visible, some not. And support from a loving community is always a day brightener and helps us overcome. <3

    God bless you all! <3
  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    emorrill wrote: »
    This is such a wonderful thread. <3 I'll have to start following it from now on.

    We all have our own battles we're fighting. Some visible, some not. And support from a loving community is always a day brightener and helps us overcome. <3

    God bless you all! <3

    Hello @emorrill
    Thankyou very much for your kind words about the thread :) I send a hug to you <3
  • UniquePuggleUniquePuggle Posts: 864 Member
    Gristolian wrote: »
    I think this is an awesome thread! ;u; I've had severe anxiety and major depression for about three years now. Right now it's been very difficult to find work in my particular field, and it's hard not to take every rejection personally. I use games (like Sims) as an outlet between work. Even though it's difficult to convince myself I need breaks, I usually feel much better after I do.

    Here's hoping all of you stay safe and healthy. Hang in there.

    We live in a culture now where it's considered selfish to be kind to yourself or it's lazy to take a break. But this is not the case. There is a huge difference between self-indulgence and self-compassion. In a world that is harsh and hurried, you need to slow down and be kind to yourself, especially to promote mental health. I always tell people that compassion is like a container of water. You can't fill others with it if your own is empty. Take care of yourself. <3
  • emorrillemorrill Posts: 3,523 Member

    We live in a culture now where it's considered selfish to be kind to yourself or it's lazy to take a break. But this is not the case. There is a huge difference between self-indulgence and self-compassion. In a world that is harsh and hurried, you need to slow down and be kind to yourself, especially to promote mental health. I always tell people that compassion is like a container of water. You can't fill others with it if your own is empty. Take care of yourself. <3

    @UniquePuggle I love that. <3 Thank you for sharing.

    Such comforting words to those of us who suffer from anxiety and/or depression. <3
  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    Gristolian wrote: »
    I think this is an awesome thread! ;u; I've had severe anxiety and major depression for about three years now. Right now it's been very difficult to find work in my particular field, and it's hard not to take every rejection personally. I use games (like Sims) as an outlet between work. Even though it's difficult to convince myself I need breaks, I usually feel much better after I do.

    Here's hoping all of you stay safe and healthy. Hang in there.

    We live in a culture now where it's considered selfish to be kind to yourself or it's lazy to take a break. But this is not the case. There is a huge difference between self-indulgence and self-compassion. In a world that is harsh and hurried, you need to slow down and be kind to yourself, especially to promote mental health. I always tell people that compassion is like a container of water. You can't fill others with it if your own is empty. Take care of yourself. <3

    Hello @UniquePuggle
    I too thank you for your caring and encouraging words that you have written <3 They are written very sensitively and caringly, and provide much encouragement to all who read them.
  • LoriTSpLoriTSp Posts: 197 Member
    Hi everyone. This thread is an awesome idea. The past couple of years have been a real challenge for me - without going into too much detail, I'll let you know what's happened ... the unemployment rate is steady at 10%, making it a challenge for both my son and I to find steady employment. At the moment we are living on social assistance and I have recently been diagnosed with a torn rotator cuff, meaning I don't have alot of range of motion in my shoulder. My son has applied for numerous jobs, with few responses, but we are always hopeful. Playing the Sims lets me escape from the real world for a short time. Despite the mountain of issues I am facing, I remain positive and hopeful. :)
  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    LoriTSp wrote: »
    Hi everyone. This thread is an awesome idea. The past couple of years have been a real challenge for me - without going into too much detail, I'll let you know what's happened ... the unemployment rate is steady at 10%, making it a challenge for both my son and I to find steady employment. At the moment we are living on social assistance and I have recently been diagnosed with a torn rotator cuff, meaning I don't have alot of range of motion in my shoulder. My son has applied for numerous jobs, with few responses, but we are always hopeful. Playing the Sims lets me escape from the real world for a short time. Despite the mountain of issues I am facing, I remain positive and hopeful. :)

    Hello @LoriTSp
    I am send hugs to you <3 with all that you and your son are going through in your lives. I am sorry to hear that you have a torn rotator cuff. It would be quite painful for you, and would be limiting you in your daily activities as you endure through the effects of restricticted movement. I hope that treatment that your doctor has ordered may help, and bring healing and lessening of pain.
    I hope that your son will be able to find employment soon. It can be quite disappointing when applying and not getting responses. Perhaps soon, a job opportunity will arise soon that is very suited to him, that his application is accepted, and will result in him being employed.
    Simming is a great way of taking a break from real life and all that our lives are holding. It allows us an opportunity to focus on something else, and helps to relax our mind and body. We laugh with , we smile with , we empathise with our sims!
    I send another hug to you <3
  • emorrillemorrill Posts: 3,523 Member
    LoriTSp wrote: »
    Hi everyone. This thread is an awesome idea. The past couple of years have been a real challenge for me - without going into too much detail, I'll let you know what's happened ... the unemployment rate is steady at 10%, making it a challenge for both my son and I to find steady employment. At the moment we are living on social assistance and I have recently been diagnosed with a torn rotator cuff, meaning I don't have alot of range of motion in my shoulder. My son has applied for numerous jobs, with few responses, but we are always hopeful. Playing the Sims lets me escape from the real world for a short time. Despite the mountain of issues I am facing, I remain positive and hopeful. :)

    @LoriTSp I really hope you and your son can find employment soon! <3 Gosh it's so rough in today's economy. :(

    Unemployment is real bad over here in oilfield country too. Thankfully, by the grace of God, my husband didn't get laid off while so many others did. We don't know where the heck else he would've been able to find a job....

    Yeah, Sims has always been my go to during hard times to help put a smile on my face. :)

    God bless. <3
  • SimTrippySimTrippy Posts: 3,194 Member
    edited February 2017
    MissBirdie wrote: »
    I've had severe anxiety for many years now, and it has got so much worse since I broke my leg in 2015, but currently I'm having a real hard time managing it.. any pain I get I convince myself I have something serious wrong with me.. it gets to the point that I can't sleep or do anything because I fully convince myself I have something wrong with me. Obviously I am aware that this is all in my head and I am fine. I have been offered CBT previously but I was too scared to go, and I really don't want to go back to the docs and ask for it as I'm coming up to my last few months at uni and my free time is non existant.. but, if anyone has had any experience with this kind of anxiety I would love to know what would help :)

    First off, lovely thread @rosemow :)

    @MissBirdie I was curious: what kind of anxiety do you have exactly? Is it generalized, social, more OCD related? CBT can be extremely helpful for some, but not for everyone. If I remember correctly, some people think that CBT for pure obsessional OCD, for example, can actually make the symptoms worse. Depending on what your anxiety is, there's other kinds of therapy next to CBT - which isn't to say CBT may not be right for you btw, it's a proven method and it can be exceptionally helpful for certain types of mental problems. If you're interested, have a look at Exposure Response Therapy (ERT) & Systemic Therapy as well. I hope you're feeling better by now. Bless you!
  • UniquePuggleUniquePuggle Posts: 864 Member
    edited February 2017
    I hope everyone is having a beautiful day!! I wanted to share a picture my sister took of the sunset in my hometown.

    Breathe in gratitude. Breathe out negativity. :)

    3vsxTnh.jpg
  • ArchivistArchivist Posts: 4,019 Member
    I hope everyone is having a beautiful day!! I wanted to share a picture my sister took of the sunset in my hometown.

    Breathe in gratitude. Breathe out negativity. :)

    This photo is amazing. The beach never fails to make me feel better, even when I'm already feeling pretty good.

    Thanks for sharing. :)
    ztOU6CW.jpg
  • MirichaMiricha Posts: 348 Member
    edited February 2017
    I don't usually like opening up this way online, but my head is buzzing so maybe posting here will help a bit.

    Last summer, my beloved mum was diagnosed with cancer. She died in November. This is the first serious bereavement I've suffered, and although everyone says I'm coping well, I don't feel like it. I can't sleep and I'm an anxious mess. I miss her every day. On top of that, I have a chronic illness which leaves me disabled. Since losing Mum, it's been worse than ever. My specialist says that's not a surprise, but it doesn't make it any easier to put up with. I can barely feed myself some days, the house is a mess, and if I didn't have my aunt bringing me groceries and my medications I don't know what I'd do. And because my illness is so bad, I can't even lose myself in the Sims (or the other games I play to relax, Stardew Valley and Animal Crossing) because I feel too ill to play most of the time. I want to scream, it's all too much.

    Thanks for letting me vent, thread. It's so nice this is here. <3
    수리수리마수리 수수리 사바
  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    Miricha wrote: »
    I don't usually like opening up this way online, but my head is buzzing so maybe posting here will help a bit.

    Last summer, my beloved mum was diagnosed with cancer. She died in November. This is the first serious bereavement I've suffered, and although everyone says I'm coping well, I don't feel like it. I can't sleep and I'm an anxious mess. I miss her every day. On top of that, I have a chronic illness which leaves me disabled. Since losing Mum, it's been worse than ever. My specialist says that's not a surprise, but it doesn't make it any easier to put up with. I can barely feed myself some days, the house is a mess, and if I didn't have my aunt bringing me groceries and my medications I don't know what I'd do. And because my illness is so bad, I can't even lose myself in the Sims (or the other games I play to relax, Stardew Valley and Animal Crossing) because I feel too ill to play most of the time. I want to scream, it's all too much.

    Thanks for letting me vent, thread. It's so nice this is here. <3

    Hello @Miricha
    I send big hugs to you <3 I am so sorry to hear about the passing away of precious, loved and loving Mum. It is a very hard time and grieving process that you are going through. Our loved ones are so special to us, and when they pass away it is distressing You are missing her, which is very natural. You will keep memories of so many special times spent with her, through happy times and harder sadder times, in a very special part of your heart and mind. It is especially hard on you as you endure through your own health issues. It is good that you have the support of your Aunt coming to assist you with groeceries and medications. It is very hard, but try to take a day by day,an hour by hour when you need to. You wil have l better days or hours, and harder days and hours. Little things that occur through the day can trigger off memories of your loving Mum for you and that can be upsetting. Try to treasure the little memories as blessings sent by your Mum. She is only a silent whisper away.
    Cry when you need to. Tears are a part of the healing of our insides in the grief. They speak words that there are no spoken words for.
    Try also to get homehelp assistance through your doctor to help you with your home. There may be also services that can provide you with meals when you are feeling too ill and tired to cook. Talk over these things with your doctor. He may be able to help provide resources both for the short term and long term.
    I send lots more hugs to you <3 I wish I could take away the pain that you are feeling. I can't do that , but please know that I will keep you in my thoughts. I send gentle rose petals to encompass your heart.
  • MirichaMiricha Posts: 348 Member
    @rosemow Thank you so much <3 As much as they hurt, I am so grateful for all the memories of my mum, and I know she'd want me to smile when I can.
    I'll talk to my doctor next time I see him. He's very helpful, so I'll see what he suggests.
    수리수리마수리 수수리 사바
  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    Miricha wrote: »
    @rosemow Thank you so much <3 As much as they hurt, I am so grateful for all the memories of my mum, and I know she'd want me to smile when I can.
    I'll talk to my doctor next time I see him. He's very helpful, so I'll see what he suggests.

    Hello
    You're very welcome <3
  • grovie2012grovie2012 Posts: 34 Member
    Hey all, do you feel like sometimes you family just doesn't want you? I have a narcissistic mother who kinda hates me. And very few friends. I have physical disabilities as well as PTSD from trauma so it is hard for me to make and keep friends. Any words of advice?
  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    grovie2012 wrote: »
    Hey all, do you feel like sometimes you family just doesn't want you? I have a narcissistic mother who kinda hates me. And very few friends. I have physical disabilities as well as PTSD from trauma so it is hard for me to make and keep friends. Any words of advice?

    Hello @grovie2012
    It is not nice for you that you are feeling unwelcome in your family and don't have many friends. It is upsetting when there are family issues. Your mother wouldn't hate you. There may just be times when people have other concerns on their minds, and give impressions that are not how they really are feeling. I send hugs to you <3 as you endure through your physical health issues and the effects of PTSD on your daily life. It is hard when we are experiencing pain and may be limited in what we can do due to disabilities. Perhaps try seeing if you can find a support group of other people who have the same physical health issues that you also have. By doing this, you will be able to talk things over with other people who can relate to how you are feeling because they too are undergoing the same experirences. Try looking up support groups on the internet. You may find some groups meet in your local area. This is a good way of making friends also.
    I send another hug to you <3
  • B_E2009B_E2009 Posts: 131 Member
    I love the idea of this thread. It's nice to have an emotional outlet, even if it is on a forum dedicated to simmers. I do have a very special relationship with the Sims franchise because my wife and I met on a Sims 2 writer's forum and got together, even though we're both from different countries.

    Currently our son is in the midst of being diagnosed with severe autism; he's completely nonverbal and intellectually disabled. Mentally he is around a year old, even though he should be starting school this year. His needs became so overwhelming that I had to stop my studies to look after him. We are inundated with meetings, assessments, therapy plans and have to decide whether or not to put him into special education, yet there is still no official diagnosis. Caring for him is rewarding but extremely difficult. Travelling anywhere with him is impossible. Because of not being 'normal parents' we have been socially isolated and friends have abandoned us. We have virtually no support from our family, as my parents live abroad and my relationship with them is strained at best, and my in-laws struggle with various mental health issues, are currently on bail for a crime I can't disclose and are not allowed to have unsupervised contact with my son. My other relatives are elderly and my beloved grandfather, who has been more of a father to me than his son, has recently been diagnosed with cancer and I'm unable to visit him. In addition, I was diagnosed with a low grade brain tumour last year, which is being closely monitored but can grow at any moment, which will mean I'll have to undergo brain surgery. If I'm out of the running, my wife is unable to work and has to look after us both, risking a nervous breakdown, and we'll be facing financial ruin.

    I have to say that life is horrifying at the moment. It's probably why I play the Sims so much.
  • rosemowrosemow Posts: 124,750 Member
    B_E2009 wrote: »
    I love the idea of this thread. It's nice to have an emotional outlet, even if it is on a forum dedicated to simmers. I do have a very special relationship with the Sims franchise because my wife and I met on a Sims 2 writer's forum and got together, even though we're both from different countries.

    Currently our son is in the midst of being diagnosed with severe autism; he's completely nonverbal and intellectually disabled. Mentally he is around a year old, even though he should be starting school this year. His needs became so overwhelming that I had to stop my studies to look after him. We are inundated with meetings, assessments, therapy plans and have to decide whether or not to put him into special education, yet there is still no official diagnosis. Caring for him is rewarding but extremely difficult. Travelling anywhere with him is impossible. Because of not being 'normal parents' we have been socially isolated and friends have abandoned us. We have virtually no support from our family, as my parents live abroad and my relationship with them is strained at best, and my in-laws struggle with various mental health issues, are currently on bail for a crime I can't disclose and are not allowed to have unsupervised contact with my son. My other relatives are elderly and my beloved grandfather, who has been more of a father to me than his son, has recently been diagnosed with cancer and I'm unable to visit him. In addition, I was diagnosed with a low grade brain tumour last year, which is being closely monitored but can grow at any moment, which will mean I'll have to undergo brain surgery. If I'm out of the running, my wife is unable to work and has to look after us both, risking a nervous breakdown, and we'll be facing financial ruin.

    I have to say that life is horrifying at the moment. It's probably why I play the Sims so much.

    Hello @B_E2009
    I send big hugs to you <3 You are going through so much in your life :( It would be very tiring both physically and mentally for you and your wife as you lovingly care for and suppprt your son. It would put you under much stress and strain,and needing to be ever alert to the needs of your son. At the same time, you have the concerns of needing to endure through your own health issues with the brain tumour. You also have the concern fir the health of your loved and loving grandather. The encouragement through it is that you have medical staff that are keeping their eye on the tumour and will be able to advise if and when surgery is needed.
    If you haven't done this aleady, it may help if you can find a suppport help group that has other parents of Autistic children. They would understand very much what your life is involving and offer helpful support and advice. There may be support groups on the internet.
    Simming is a very special way to help us take a break and rest from all that our days and life is holding. It helps to relax our minds and bodies, as we focus on our sims family,
    I send another hug to you <3 It is hard, and you would be taking each day by day.
  • FairyGodMotherFairyGodMother Posts: 6,729 Member
    It has been a while since I visited! I visit here and read posts. I realized a long time ago that everyone has a different experience and every post/experience counts. Life is not easy or fair at times, but I want you all to know....
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  • MissBirdieMissBirdie Posts: 2,999 Member
    MissBirdie wrote: »
    I've had severe anxiety for many years now, and it has got so much worse since I broke my leg in 2015, but currently I'm having a real hard time managing it.. any pain I get I convince myself I have something serious wrong with me.. it gets to the point that I can't sleep or do anything because I fully convince myself I have something wrong with me. Obviously I am aware that this is all in my head and I am fine. I have been offered CBT previously but I was too scared to go, and I really don't want to go back to the docs and ask for it as I'm coming up to my last few months at uni and my free time is non existant.. but, if anyone has had any experience with this kind of anxiety I would love to know what would help :)

    I am going through severe anxiety currently. I suffer from chronic migraines, endometriosis and (possibly) trigeminal neuralgia. I recently tore small ligament in my leg in September of 2016. I also have small episodic attacks in my head that are extremely painful but only last a minute or two and the doctors cannot explain it. Due to all this living in a normal manner is very difficult. Managing my pain and anxiety is hard. It is a constant battle.

    You will have to do detective work to find out what coping mechanisms work best for you. Some things I am trying out now are diaphragmatic breathing, physical therapy for my illnesses and behavioral therapy. I know this sounds juvenile but journaling works for me sometimes. I express myself and those feelings leave me and stick to the paper. You mentioned that you are aware of your anxiety. I feel that is one of the biggest steps for anyone facing anxiety of any degree is to realize they have it.

    CBT may sound like its too much but I've only been to a few sessions and I can feel how much it has helped me. I'm not done with my anxiety but I feel more calm knowing I'm not alone in the situation anymore. My therapist is very thorough and forthcoming about what to expect. It is a partnership of sorts to help you manage your anxiety. Severe anxiety is extremely difficult to trek through on your own. I don't know anyone with it that hasn't sought CBT but you may be able to. I would highly encourage you to consider it after your studies are over. One more thing: Don't just go into CBT alone. I would ask your doctor for other treatments as well. I'm in physical therapy and have medications. Sleep habits and diet is important. I would do bloodwork and everything to get to the bottom of the anxiety. Your mind and body are connected. Taking care of both during this process will be the key.

    Much luck to you with your severe anxiety. I pray that you find the path that will manage it better. If you need anything just ask. I am here for you. Once I complete my CBT, I'll let you know what I think of it overall. Much love and Happy Simming.

    I have only just seen your reply but thank you! I really appreciate it. I plan on when my studies have finished in a few months to start focusing more on my health and will probably go for CBT as It seems the best option.

    Again thankyou for your kind words! What you are dealing with sounds awful and I hope you are well and the CBT is helping! <3
    “Lying, the telling of beautiful untrue things, is the proper aim of Art.” – Oscar Wilde.
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